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This girl I work with is a lesbian and married

posted 5 years ago by MovieBuff224 (5053)
46 replies | jump to latest

To a woman. I’m 36 and she’s 30. She’s very attractive, very feminine and I can’t help but notice some sexual tension between us. I don’t flirt at all for obvious reasons in the world we live in today but I’m wondering if she’s really even gay or just had a really bad experience with an abusive guy?

She has not made her sexuality or marriage to a woman public, but most of the people at work know by now. I do not want to make a move or anything because she’s married, but I am very curious to know if she’s really gay.

[–] Kowalski (79058) 5 years ago

WOW...ENJOY THE REPLIES...

[–] froggyandtoadie (835) 5 years ago

🍿

[–] StoneKeeper (28333) 5 years ago

I actually expected the worst when I read this title but the post is not so bad.

[–] chilone (18316) 5 years ago

Maybe her door swings both ways. I applaud you not wanting to make a move. Infidelity is the worst sort of betrayal.

[–] [deleted] 5 years ago

It's possible you're imagining things, not having been there for any of this alleged sexual tension.

Whatever the case may be, I'd follow HR rules to the letter, if you like or need your job. Even if she overtly flirts with you or makes risqué comments. Most companies won't care that you were only responding to things that she said or did. I've seen how these things go down, and the focus is always on the dude when a woman makes an official complaint.

[–] Kowalski (79058) 5 years ago

YOU DESCRIBE HER AS 30,VERY ATTRACTIVE,VERY FEMININE...BUT YOU ONLY DESCRIBE YOURSELF AS 36.ARE YOU HIDEOUSLY DISFIGURED AND WEAR A CAPE WHILE PLAYING THE PIANO?

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

Haha I wish! I’m above average looking.

[–] [deleted] 5 years ago

get back to work and leave the woman alone

[–] Kowalski (79058) 5 years ago

HAHAHA,AWESOME.

[–] [deleted] 5 years ago

this made me laugh

[–] [deleted] 5 years ago

I think it's a fantasy.

[–] [deleted] 5 years ago

of course it is.

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

See below, you are WRONG!

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

I don’t spend much time away from my duties talking to her. Don’t you think it’s a little silly and obvious to go straight for the predator angle? I clearly stated I wasn’t pursuing her or even considering it. I don’t ever go for married chicks anyway.

[–] GlenEllyn (21659) 5 years ago

Nice to hear you have some ethics respecting marriage - whether it's yours or someone else's. Workplace relationships are not a good idea anyway.

[–] [deleted] 5 years ago

how comfortable do you think she would be with knowing that you're thinking and fantasizing about her? how comfortable would she be with you posting about her on an internet chat room? I'm not saying you're a predator, I'm saying you're a child.

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

There’s nothing childish about being curious and trying to learn. Who said I fantasized about her? I just said I thought we shared a mutual attraction and wondered if that was even possible.

[–] Ladronmc (176) 5 years ago

I agree. That poster seems a little hellbent on making silly comments.

Strawman arguments are usually the work of 11 year olds. You never stated that you were "fantasizing" about anyone and nobody with a brain would conclude that from your posts. Just ignore the odd attacks.

With regards to the topic on hand, I agree with most. Work relationships ships are not something you should pursue. Avoid that. Suppress that curiosity.

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

Thanks, yeah you’re prob right.

[–] twinA (4921) 5 years ago

Please, do not covet another person's wife.

Too often, love is a one-way street, with respect only given to one and not the other.

Do not create friction where none exists. You may only be attracted to her because she is unavailable to you.

Request a transfer if you find yourself unable to work with her. This way, you are not only being fair to her, but to yourself too.

Even in films, love triangles rarely if ever work out. "Your Sister's Sister" is the most relevant example to your current experience, giving you the benefit of a doubt as to your intentions with this topic here.

Go in peace.

~~/o/

[–] AmeriGirl26 (15104) 5 years ago

If she's married to a woman, she's gay. The fact that she isn't ugly or taking on the butch dike look, merely means she likes being feminine, despite the stereotypes put on her lifestyle. They call those "Lipstick Lesbians," and they're very hard to spot, because they look exactly like ordinary, attractive, straight women. Such women are actually not common in the Gay Community, based on what I've observed in the past 20 years.

It's better if you busy yourself with your own life and don't bother her about it. Be polite, kind, and maybe a friend, but don't pry, or she'll suspect you of being a homophobe.

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

Yeah, that’s a reasonable explanation.

[–] [deleted] 5 years ago

have you seen the scene in "Chasing Amy" where one guys explaining about a lipstick lesbian?
vFunny.

edit - here it is:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LS7gEGl_dKg

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

Yes, great movie

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

So new development - a couple nights ago she opened up to me, went into specific detail of being gay and her history with coming out, made it a point to tell me she’s “dated lots of guys” and that she simply feels a bit more of an emotional connection with women. She then went on to tell me she has a very strong desire to give birth. I knew I was right, I am always going to trust my gut, this gets reinforced more and more the older I get. Your response was reasonable, Amerigirl, but to all of the hateful comments from feminazis in here - kiss my ass I told you so!! (You only get to say this so often but boy is it sweet.)

[–] AmeriGirl26 (15104) 5 years ago

Be careful if she petitions you to be the donor dad. Things get very tricky when gay couples (particularly the lesbians) try to look for ways to have kids in ways that are....creative. You're gonna have to make your own judgement on that one.

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

Lol yeah I thought about that, prob not worth getting wrapped up in that (no pun intended)

[–] AmeriGirl26 (15104) 5 years ago

Smart move.

[–] [deleted] 5 years ago

sperm donor alert!!

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

I’ll just spike her drink w plan b, if it gets me a 3 way w 2 hot chicks it’s worth the effort

[–] Quasimodo (16388) 5 years ago

Only one way to find out. Confront her at work with a raging boner and see what happens. What could go wrong...?

[–] [deleted] 5 years ago

"Do you find this technique usually works?"
to quote "Trainspotting"

[–] MovieBuff224 (5053) 5 years ago

Haha