MovieChat Forums > You Again (2010) Discussion > one of the most IRRESPONSIBLE movies I h...

one of the most IRRESPONSIBLE movies I have ever seen!!

posted 14 years ago by sourpuss
73 replies | jump to latest

Okay, so I totally am the person who never understood why people go on sites just to bash a movie but having just seen this movie I felt instantly compelled to express my complete shock at how horrible and irresponsible this movie unfolded before my very eyes.

I just watched this film on Netflix and was at first excited to endulge in one of my guiltiest pleasures, the "chick" flick. But I just could not believe how horrible it just kept getting and getting.

How is this film irresponsible? Because it teaches that if you bully a person for four years and never own up to it (unless you get caught, of course) that not only do you get to marry the man of your dreams, but the family of the person you tormented will welcome you with open and loving arms.

Joanna's character is one of the most deplorable characters I have ever seen on film. Not just because she bullies someone (I actually agree that we do stupid and sometimes terrible things when we are children and should be forgiven for them if we are truly sorry) but because she willingly seduces the family of the person she tormented without telling them the horrible things she did to their daughter. If she truly had forgotten, then her actions would make sense. But the film tells us that she does remember them...so she has been willingly withholding something incredibly important from them the whole time she was with Tim. She lied to her fiance and she lied to his family. She did it because she just wanted to be a part of a family? Okay, I could buy that but then she still continues to bully the sister even further. Just horrible!

Could the film have redeemed Joanna? Yes...by making her truly sorry for what she did to Kirsten Bell's character and apologizing not only to her character but to the whole family. But instead Joanna just says "Look at what you did to me!!!"

I am truly not trying to insult anyone who liked this movie...I for one just felt really insulted while watching it.

Did I put too much thought into it? Perhaps. But thank you for letting me get this off my chest!

[–] shewasasourgirltheday 13 years ago

AGREED! IMO, Joanna never truly redeemed herself. Yes, she gave Marni her apology eventually, but come on - it was too little, too late. When Marni outright confronts her and demands an apology, Joanna responds with, "Sorry," and continues putting on her lip gloss. Her tone was completely bitchy. More importantly, how do you justify lying to your fiance about being engaged to some weirdo? I didn't like Joanna's character. I didn't sympthatize with her AT ALL. And I also find it funny that Marni's brother had NO idea that Joanna had picked on Marni in school. I know they had that one scene in the tree house (where Marni's apologizing for making him miss the basketball shot. What a bitch Marni is for doing that on purpose. OH WAIT! Joanna pushed her into him!) and she doesn't tell him who is picking on her, but come on. If they really went to the same school for 2 years (Marni and her brother, since she was 2 years behind him), wouldn't he have some clue?

[–] litaps27 13 years ago

idk. while, i agree that she was REALLY REALLY horrible, i think that she already got the punishment she deserved. i mean, she was humiliated at her own engagement party. it's only natural (and REALISTIC) that she would get angry at marni. it's one thing to be humiliated in front of peers that are nothing to you and it's another to be humiliated in front of the people you love. but at the end of the day, no matter how she reacted at first, what matters is that she DID SAY SORRY AND genuinely apologized. if youre still hung over at what joanna did despite her efforts to make ammends and become a better person, then i believe the message of the movie didnt really reach to you---> past is past. forgive and move on.

[–] staticsaber 13 years ago

We get the message... the problem was that the movie didn't. For two hours you have these characters go on about, "Forgive and forget," but then they turn around and try to show up someone for doing something years ago.

See... the main character is searching for an apology... but the villain never gave it to her... in fact, she knew she was tormenting her future sister in law, the same girl she humiliated on a daily basis back in high school... but then she turns around, "I did some horrible things to someone... but I'll make up for it some how, I'LL PROVE TO MY DECEASED PARENTS I'M A GOOD PERSON!"

Only to continue to bully the girl.

See what I'm getting at? I get what the film is trying to say... the problem is the film doesn't know what it's trying to say.

And ruined her engagement party? For what? Inviting some guy she left hanging at the alter and showing a video of her being a loud teenaged bitch? ALL THIS IN FRONT OF HER FRIENDS THAT MOST LIKELY KNEW ALL ABOUT IT!? OHHHH, HOW AWFUL!

She didn't want her new family to find out about this? She should have told them... or better yet... Apologized.

And she still deserved it. She recorded herself doing that. She lied to the family. She continued to be a bitch... And the movie wanted us to feel sorry for her? That's the only funny thing about this movie, really XD

"Rhino, you won the coin toss. Will you crush his skull or simply impale his heart on your horn?"

[–] hellotrouble 13 years ago

I agree with the OP. Joanna still showed signs of her old behavior. If she had totally changed, why would she give Marni a necklace that says "moo" on it when that was the nickname she called Marni to make fun of her in high school? And why does she sing "we are the champions" when she once sang that song to imply that Marni was a loser? And there's the scene in the bathroom where Joanna tells Marni that Will won't believe her (Marni) and that Marni still is four-eyed and pimply like before. She acts really sweet in front of her fiancee, but when it's just her and Marni, she says and does things she wouldn't want Will to know about. If Joanna had shown no signs of this old behavior, maybe, after she'd apologized to Marni, the movie would have been okay. But the sugary-sweet way she acts in the beginning seems so fake I wonder if she really had changed.

Maybe I'm not very forgiving, but I was glad to see Joanna humiliated and was hoping she wouldn't end up with her man. Maybe I'm just prejudiced because I dealt with bullies in elementary school and it's had a very negative effect on my life. I can move on now and live a normal life, but if I found out of one of those bullies was going to become part of my family? I don't know if I could handle that.

[–] lisatherookie2 13 years ago

Ugggg. I am so in agreement with almost everyone on this board. But one more thing bothered me. MARNI'S FAMILY!!!!
Her father the good doctor was basically reaming mother and daughter out because Marnie's tape and the pool debacle. WHY THE HELL DIDN'T HE TAKE HIS DAUGHTER'S SIDE?????? My father would have locked horns with anyone who did that to me. Especially after seeing it with his own 2 eyes on tape not 2 hours before. Furious and on my side.
The mother was too involved in her own drama to see what her daughter was feeling. She said "Didn't you see the tape in there?" and then said she wasn't going to do this in that room and walked out. When they argued outside no more was mentioned about how Ramona's neice was a big ass bully and out and out bitch to her daughter.
The grandmother Bunny loved JJ. Why? Because she went to the mall a couple times with her? She saw the girl put a necklace on her grand daughter with the word MOO on it and let it pass? No way would my grand mother let me wear that. She would have told JJ/Joanna that she needed to get me something else. STAT!
The brother Tim, Oh what a moron. It was kinda implied that he was some sort of hero to marnie through HS and he protected her in a way. Yet he was pissy when some mean ass cheerleader (who he was going to marry 5 yrs later) SHOVED his beloved sister into him at a basketball game. She was clearly pushed yet he blamed her. How did he miss JJ's bullying all those years???? Was he blind? THEN his sister showed him how bad it was for her and how horrible his future wife was and he again blamed Marni. For what???? Saving him from marrying a liar? Oh no. Bad Marni! As if.
The only one on Marni's side was the little brother. And only by coercion.

[–] hellotrouble 13 years ago

I'm getting confused....people keep calling Marni's older brother Tim.....isn't Tim the weird guy Joanna was engaged to and then backed out? But yeah, I keep thinking of Joanna as "Megan" in my head because she really reminds me of Megan Fox, in looks anyways and there is another movie where Megan Fox plays the mean, popular girl .

[–] jmota-1 13 years ago

This film showed the most common conception, a bully can only get to you if you let them....At the end of the film the protagonist, was a professional, successful in who she was, and confident....To where she realized that her bully was not mean but rather weak....The film is not about redemption but of overcoming and growing up, and believing in your self, it was only when she tried to get vengeance, or be like the bully or bully the antagonist, she caused hurt and damage to her family and brother. In the end the bully could not bully her, because she knew who she was, and what she was....In high school she did not, the bully did not change but the protagonist did....

[–] RainyCloudz 13 years ago

Good thing I didn't finish watching this mess. It was so mean-spirited and dumb I had to turn it off early.

[–] painterjane25 13 years ago

It was a horrible message. This was a terrible movie, and I am usually a sucker for lame comedies, but this one had zero heart.

[–] nereidon 13 years ago

seems like most people in this thread did. since they all missed the part when she truly said she was sorry, and explained that after her parents have died she realized what a horrible person she had been and she wanted to change into someone they could have been proud of. she actually did change, but when she realized who the sister of her husband-to-be was she just panicked and played dumb (and dirty). because as she also said she was afraid to lose them all once the truth was out. i mean ... that is not so far fetched, is it?

________________________________________
" People being stupid is not a plot hole " - by redwingjs

[–] The_Mad_Professor 13 years ago

Okay, it's time to play Devil's Advocate here...

Joanna was (rightfully) trying to let it go and move past high school, but Marni wasn't having any of that, and (rightfully) wanted her apology. When she didn't get it, Marni started pushing Joanna over and over again, essentially becoming the bully and tormentor she so despised (a fact that Joanna backhandedly told her when she called her use of the time capsule tape "genius"). When Joanna had enough, she started lashing back at Marni, reverting to her old ways. This might not have happened if Marni had acted like an adult instead of a butthurt child.

Marni was so wrapped up in her desire for an apology and was so focused on the past that she failed to see what was going on in the present. She was blind to the fact that Joanna had genuinely and legitimately changed for the better and was a good person. Had she been completely farcical as a person, her true colors would have shown when she was away from Marni and her family. However, she was shown to be scared, apologetic, and vulnerable, a far cry from her Queen Bitch of the Universe persona in high school.

In this movie, Marni, not Joanna, was the villain, a Well Intentioned Extremist, perhaps, but the villain nonetheless. Marni let her own personal vendetta get in the way of common sense, and in the process nearly destroyed a legitimately happy couple, ruined a rehearsal dinner, broke the law (digging up the time capsule before the due date could be interpreted as vandalism), and even drug her little brother into the mess.

Make no mistake, Joanna was no angel, but at least she was trying to get past it all, as opposed to Marni, who wouldn't let it go.

Corrupting Impressionable Youths Since 1976.

[–] GypsyNomad 13 years ago

Eh... But JJ went from 'not knowing' Marnie, even to Marnie's face, and she almost believed her, to looking in the mirror, intentionally terrorizing Marnie with the song outside of the high school, and then diving off from there. She could have easily ignored the digs from Marnie for a while longer, and then Marnie might have dropped it, or pulled her aside later, admitting she finally remembered and apologized. Marnie only went to drastic measures because JJ was antagonizing her and making Marnie to rising to higher and higher levels to retaliate, or get her brother's attention. Her brother didn't want to listen to her and JJ went vicious quickly. She didn't even really try to be nice to Marnie.

"I totally saw his wolf junk"

[–] sourpuss 13 years ago

playing devil's advocate is important and painting marni as the villain is an interesting take.

i simply disagree. joanne pretended not to know marni, which means she was trying to avoid getting her mean past discovered. even if she legitimately did not remember marni, then that says she has done little to no reflection to her horrible behavior in high school.

marni was no saint either since she could have simply told her brother the truth from the beginning. but joanna was just a terrible character in a terrible film.

[–] thetrev 13 years ago

But she explains that she was trying to reform herself but got scared when she realised that her past would be brought up, especially in the family of the person she tormented.

To me, what this film showed was that dwelling too much on the past can ruin your present. Joanne shows she has lied to her fiance and future in-laws because she is ashaned of her past and scared... Marni is twisted by it (and I can understand why!) but turns herself into a bit of a monster, not thinking how her actions will affect her family, especially her brother.

[–] The_Mad_Professor 13 years ago

Was Joanna wrong for pretending that she didn't remember? Sure. Was she wrong for not revealing her past? Sure. However, her reasons were, if not commendable, at least understandable. She despised who she was before, and by not talking about it, she hoped to just avoid the situation entirely. Then Marni came along and brought everything to light.

Joanna was perfectly happy to leave her past behind, as that was not who she was anymore. When Marni started bringing up the past in her misguided but understandable attempt to help her brother, Joanna regressed a bit into her JJ persona to strike back. She tried her best to ignore all the taunts and the pointed questions and jabs, but there's only so much a person can take, so she struck back. If you notice, Marni was the one on the attack. Joanna's actions struck me more as half-hearted and defensive, as opposed to mean spirited.

Marni, however, was reveling in the idea of getting back at Joanna. She claimed she just wanted a heartfelt apology, but she got a taste of what it was like to be on the other side of the bullying, and she liked it. I dare say that, had Marni looked in the past as she did in the present, she could have very well been the mean girl in school.

Corrupting Impressionable Youths Since 1976.

[–] MarblesLove 8 years ago

Just playing a little devil's advocate to your devil's advocate.

If Joanna really had changed, as you point out in your comment, then why couldn't she have just apologized for what she did, and then let it be? That's all Marni wanted, so why not just apologize, especially if she really was sorry and really did regret doing to things she did to Marni (and I'm assuming others as well) in high school?

Once upon a time there was a magical place where it never rained. The end.