MovieChat Forums > Art School Confidential (2006) Discussion > art students -- describe some of your pe...

art students -- describe some of your peers' lamest artworks


Here's one...

I went to C.U. Boulder during the whole Jon Benet fiasco. Anyone could reserve the wall down the hallway of the art building to display their work. In the middle of the investigation, a classmate painted the entire hallway flourescent yellow, put 3 photocopies of Jon Benet's photo from Newsweek on the wall, and stenciled in 2-foot tall letters: "Daddy's Little H**ker".

The sad thing is, that display garnered more attention than anything else produced all year. All of the gossip TV shows were there and the "artist" just ate the attention up. He had nothing worthwhile to say, but just spent every interview grinning from ear to ear. He even videotaped the shows and made us watch for his critique.

(Paul, if you ever read this, I still think you are a no-talent loser!)

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Back when I was a struggling young studio art (photography) at a pretty well known institution a girl in one of my 400 level classes did this ridiculous series of dogs in a shelter. It was so stupid and shallow. The first thing my 6th grade photography teacher taught me was to avoid dogs and babies unless its a paying job (like some sh*tty calendar). Anyway it was terrible and of course it got way more attention than my much more deserving prints.

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Do I have to? It just makes me die a little bit more inside if I do.

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off the top of my head i'll drop this one:
i had an illustration assignment called "101." you have a big piece of illustration board with 101 squares on it and you have to do 101 variations on whatever idea you pick (i did 101 imaginary flags- some friends did suns, george washingtons, gumball machines...whatever). so my friends and i slaved over this thing for weeks, staying up late and so on. the day of the crit the kid that we all couldn't stand showed up with a bunch of photographs of himself cut up and glued into all the squares- and not neatly i might add. i'm sure i have a better story than that, but i will never ever forget the murderous rage that filled me that morning.

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I feel bad about this because I liked this girl a lot, but it was pretty terrible. (background, I think that art should have appeal beyond the knee-jerk. most people at my school disagree with me)

She made a hanging installation (all precut plastic pieces, with binder rings, she didn't MAKE anything) that had all kinds of random slang on it. It was in silver, white, black, and red. It was supposed to have something to do with 'white' America taking over 'black' culture. It made NO sense, it was ugly as hell, and she couldn't even explain it well (which might have made up for the slipshod presentation) There was one other student who stuck up for her, and the rest of us were there 40 MINUTES AFTER CLASS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE OVER because they kept trying to defend it. Even the teacher was like "This sucks"

That class was such a failure. What a waste of $800 a credit.

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Actually this last year some Senior working on his final thesis Xeroxed and enlarged newspaper obituary photos for all the dead soldiers in Iraq. He then proceeded to paint a bloody-red number on their faces, eventually tallying up to the total number of dead Soldiers. And if that wasn't enough he decided to deck 'em out with swasticas to make another point. Then he took each individual photocopy and taped them up around the interior perimeter of the building until they made a full circuit.

Everybody hated it. He kept saying that he was trying to call Bush a Nazi, but most everybody, even extreme leftists, said it was uncalled for. If you're going to attack Bush, google-search his face and blend it with Adolf's, just don't attack the dead, especially those who died defending you. He had to take it down before he planned to after the school got close to a thousand phone calls. Long story short, I don't think the kid'll be an interior designer in the near future.

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I can just imagine what the guy was thinking people would say...
Original!!!
Shocking!!!
Poignant!!!
Thought-provoking!!!
Controversial!!!!

When everyone was really thinking...
Trite.
Ham-fisted.
Pointless.
Offensive.

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I am going to ignore the question a little, and share my peer's lamest critique...
The artwork itself was fine - pretty basic expressionistic portraits of the girl, her family, and her boyfriend - But the critique of them was ridiculous. The girl had an ongoing habit on trying to control the conditions of her critiques in odd ways. In this case she announced that the critique was going to be run like an episode of "The Weakest Link", and preceded to ask people trivia questions (about subjects such as Harry Potter and Tori Amos) and whoever got the questions right were then asked a question about her paintings, or something, I dont remember exactly...It was hard to pay attention with compulsively rolling eyes...I just remember that there was a lot more discussion of the rules of "The Weakest Link" than of the paintings, and at one point she went off on a monologue about how unnattractive she was, until the professor volunteered somewhat intoxicatedly (It was the last crit of the quarter, and someone had brought wine) that she was, in his oppinion, quite an attractive girl.
This is why I enjoy any movie that satarizes art school. It really is rather difficult to over do it.

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Now the real question is how many people here have no problem criticizing these pieces of art yet go home everyday and flip on their MTV or bow down to cheesy 80's metal.

Words of Wisdom are of the Wise-The Wise Man.

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While I haven't seen MTV in a long time, I can tell you with some certainty that more skill and thought went in to the excecution of the WORST hair band video than the kind of things people tried to pass off for art in some of my classes.

Here's another example: three people stand in front of a microphone. Each one rolls up his or her sleeves and dips their hands into a tub of vaseline. For the next ten minutes they squish the vaseline between their fingers while holding them close to the microphone... and that is interesting, how?

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You just don't understand the deep social comentary that is vasaline squishing. It is obviously a depiction of tbe inner trust one human being can have with another during moments of vulnerability in which only the truest and deepest love can allow. In this case anal sex. Jeez get hip.

Words of Wisdom are of the Wise-The Wise Man.

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moviedude... thanks, now I get it! All the while I just thought it was something they pulled out of their a$$

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OK, were you able to keep a straight face, and if so, how? I was cracking up over your description. If I had to witness it, I would have been rolling on the floor or my head would have exploded.

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circa 1983...

this one student's senior show had his paintings displayed but he incorporated a performance in which he climbed a ladder, ripped up a photo of Breshnev, descended and then smashed a mirror. as if this wasn't enough, a soundtrack of whales mating played in the background.

i don't recall what the paintings looked like. ha.

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GG Allin *beep* and rubbing the fecal matter all over his face and naked body

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A painting of a swastica formed by cigarette butts. Pretty deep stuff.

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Man, most of the pieces I saw freshman year was pretty awful.
Some girl once brought in a bunch of rocks and made some stupid analogy to the female body and earth and all that hippy mumbo jumbo..and of course our teacher loved it.

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Heheh.

That actually sounds quite interesting. What I don't get are people going to Art School to draw pictures of their hands. Or paint barbed wire ('We're a prison society!'). Or make fabric hangings with sanitary towels.

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HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA.

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One piece stood out as being particularly bad when I went round a Uni's art degree show the other week - a photo of a withered old tree with photoshopped transparent figures of family members dotted around it - the title: Family Tree - I kid you not !!!

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The funny thing is, that piece was probably deeply profound and heartfelt to them. You always have to walk that fine line in which you want to be polite and not step all over their feelings, but at the same time, crappy art is crappy art.

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i have to get in on this.

I am currently going to art school and have seen more then enough *beep* being presented durring crits. One of my favorites was last year in my begining screenprinting class. This girl screenprinted a jamaican flag on a mirror and with negative space there was some slang...something to the effect of "im jammin" or "hangin out" or somthing completely stupid.

well anyway durring the critique all of her friends in the class tried to stand up for it, when finally the teacher spoke up and said "it looks like you won this at a carnival"

i felt so bad for her but i could not stop laughing b/c it was so true!

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My English teacher once told the class how his roommate in college (an art student) *beep* in a clear plastic box, covered it glitter, and called it art.

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This one is a musical fiasco. I was at a student run multimedia festival. The opening act was your typical garage type Nirvana wannabees...or so I thought. It was much worse. The entire act consisted of two of the bandmembers crouching on the ground with their guitars (ala Jimmi Hendrix) and violently strumming to create a constant noice that sounded like the volume cranked up on a TV without a signal. The lead "singer" did nothing more than scream into the microphone, roll on the ground, and combinations of the two. At one point, a fourth band member went on stage and broke a piece of styrofoam over his head. I understood what they were going for, but it came off really lame (try swinging a piece of styrofoam in the air--it catches wind, so the guy had a hell of a time actually getting it to break on the other fellow's head). To top it all off, the thing went on non stop for twenty minutes! Sucked big time

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I'm extremely open-minded about contemporary art but I'm also very aware there are alot of "artists" who miss the point.

This guy presenting a "performance art" piece had his friend go around the audience asking everyone to sign disclaimers IN CASE THE ARTIST DIED during the performance(?!). I refused to sign it and was one of only two people to boycott it and stay in the bar, but we still could view it on a tv monitor. So the artist had his friend string him up nude and whip him until he could take no more. All I saw after that was the artist wrapped in a blood-drenched sheet being carried off to hospital. He was okay, later he came back to the bar to bask in the glory of his genius.

The ridiculous thing about it is that his paintings and drawings are amazing so really he should just stick to that.

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The guy currently sitting next to me does photo-realistic paintings of American Gas Stations (we're all Northern Irish). He has no reason for it, no justification that stands up and is aggressively defensive in group critiques.

I wouldn't, perhaps, mind so much if he wasn't a beanie-hat wearing, pretentious bollox who drains the life out of our little workspace and gets his thuggish six foot friend in to help him put up his paintings (in case I've encroached on his space and he needs to defend himself).

A boy last year was painting cartoon people raping each other, but he seems to have grown out of it.

And then there's the guy painting (badly) pictures of the burning towers on 9/11 and Osama Bin Laden. He didn't even try and explain those ones.

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