Why do most people feel sorry for Holden but not Alyssa?

Alyssa changed her whole life around for Holden where he didnt have to change a thing, she points this out to him in the movie, at the beginning of the film she was already in a relationship with another woman before Holden came along then she ended it to be with him changing her entire sexual orientation, alienating all her friends, a total upheavel of her life. Then Holden finds out about her past and wants her to do more just so he can feel like a big man?! Then a year later after she shifts her life drastically once more, because if you didnt notice she wasnt with another man at the end it was a woman, meaning she had to change her sexual orientation once more and then Holden comes along with a comic book that basically apologizes and admits he was wrong and what is she suppose to do change her entire life again because this man is really slow on the uptake?


So I ask those who sympathize with Holden: How can you feel sorry for this trifle little fool of a man???????