Lancaster Bowl Manager: Look, I've told you. We don't need nuthin'. We don't even have a novelty machine in the men's room anymore.
Roy: And you call yourselves a bowling alley?
Roy: Take that, you freaky piece of *beep* You don't mow another guy's lawn.
Ishmael: Ten frames?
Ishmael: That's for Quakers.
Roy: Hey! Listen, you stupid banana head! You don't have to bet. I'll bet for you.
The scene with them pretending to be dictionary salesman.
Bartender: Your friend says you're the best salesman in the company. You must be a pretty smooth talker.
Ishmael: Uh.....yeah yup.
Bartender: You usually get that way when you drink Ginger Ale?
Roy: He was sniffing glue in the parking lot.
Bartender: I haven't heard this one in a while, how does the rest of this hustle work?
Roy: Nice going De Niro.
Ishmael: It's Steve. You wanna blow the whole thing?
Roy: Let me tell you something Mother Theresa, just because you spend most of your time in the missionary position doesn't make you a missionary.
Claudia: Must be tough when you're spanking your monkey
Ishmael: You have a monkey?
Claudia: Listen Mr. Munster, you're the not exactly smartest guy I've ever ran across.
Roy: Oh yeah, and who are you, Alfred Einstein?
Woman in bar: Oh God, that's my boyfriend, Skidmark.
Ishmael: I'd like to meet him.
Woman in bar: I don't think you want to meet him.
Ishmael: Hi Mr. Skidmark!
Roy: Shhh. What did I just say?
Ishmael: I think I tore my sac?
Y'know, I could eat a peach for hours
"So if I were you, I would start doing some tongue exercises by Friday"...
All the other quotes have already been said.
Great movie.
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