Let's hear some of your favorites. Here's one of mine:
The prison scene with Dr Klan (this is the best I can remember it).
Klan "These are men who do care, but don't drink!"
Prisoner "Hey, I don't care"
Other prisoner "Yeah, and I don't drink"
Klan "Do you care?"
Prisoner "No"
Klan "Guard, put this man in cell number one and get him a drink!"
Guard "What do you want to drink?"
Prisoner "I don't care"
LMAO
During Catholic High School Girls in Trouble, a title card says "BEYOND PERVERSION!" and the next shot has a cream pie hurled at a horse's ass. I damn near choked.
Also, Loo teaching the guard dog a lesson in A Fistful of Yen.
Fistful of Yen... the guards with the flashing lights and the megaphones sending the alarm.. The girl asks John Landis, "can I see your/you're nuts?"
share"someone pissed in your popcorn. FILM AT ELEVEN!"
"moscow in flames, missles headed for new york. FILM AT ELEVEN!"
"I'm not wearing any pants. FILM AT ELEVEN!"
*beep*
*guy aims a kick at loo which he easily blocks* "What was that? THIS is not a chawade! You need total concentwation! Now try again. WITH FEEWING!" *guy kicks loo in the stomach hard causing him to double over in pain*
strange how thats all i really remember...having just watched the movie yesterday. But what i do member is scenes...not quotes.
Dr Krahn's answering machine:Herro.this is Dr.Krahn.I am currentry buirding a fighting force,of extra-ordinary magnitude- and cannot be disturbed at this time.prease leave your name,and your message,after the beep.you have our gratitude!
shareThis guy's tough and ruthless, while this guy's rough and toothless.
"Every fight is a food fight, if you're a cannibal" - Demetri Martin
[deleted]
I think it was in the catholic School Girls in Trouble, the girl says "Show me your nuts.."
The guy looks around around on the sly, then suddenly actin crazy- wagglin his fingers, runin around wild and makin weird noises
It gets me everytime.
Flim Springfield!
All the listening devices in Loo's room.
After Loo beats all the guards and the camera pulls back and he's knee deep in bodies.
More offensive than mandingo.
Willer Time!!
When Loo is training his student.
Scott Free the Board Game.
"This guy's tough and ruthless, while this guy's rough and toothless."
I was looking to see if anyone posted, that just sticks with me. HILARIOUS
"The popcorn you're eating has been pissed in... film at eleven."
"Samuel L. Bronkowitz presents..."
"Catholic High School Girls in Trouble"
Lawyer: Is it not true that you are also a driving instructor.
Man: No
Lawyer: So it is true
Man: Yes
Lawyer: That you're NOT a driving instructor
Man: No
Lawyer: Your honor I object to this line of questioning
"...and the capitol of Nebraska is Lincoln!"
This is the knowledge that I bring. It's universal, and worldwide!
"This is Butkus, Klahn's bodyguard. He is tough and ruthless. This is Kwong, Klahn's chauffeur. He is rough and toothless."
"Christ! Did a cow *beep* in here?"
Claude LaMont: "I live ze unknown, I love ze unknown, I AM ze unknown."
Paul Burmaster: "Claude, where are you living now?"
Claude LaMont: "Zat... is unknown."
"Mrs Burke! I thought you were Dale!"
Everytime Klahn says "Butkus".
The "AHHP AHHP AHHP" alarm guy with the police light on his head in Klahn's compound.
Evan Kim slo-mo mouthing "What the *beep*
When the sex instruction record guy says "B" as his multiple choice answer.
And pretty much everything else in the whole movie. :)
The popcorn your eating has been pissed in...film at eleven..
--- So perfect for an opening line of a movie when people are settling in with a tub of popcorn.
Entire Fistful of Yen bit...
Zinc Oxide... I've seen enough of the old school film strips (still had a few when I was in grade school in the mid-late 80s) to know the thing is spot on!
This movie is hysterical - Rex Kramer: Danger seeker, Catholic High School Girls in Trouble, Big Jim Slade and United Appeal for the dead are standouts, but in the courtroom scene the "happy birthday dear Sheldon" always cracks me up.
share"This is Butkus, Klahn's bodyguard. He is tough and ruthless. This is Kwong, Klahn's chauffeur. He is rough and toothless." kills me on the 20th watch!!
....
http://soundcloud.com/dj-snafu-bankrupt-euros
Coz lifes too short to listen to Madlib
SHE... was six feet of black dynamite!
HE... was a short, Hasidic Jew!
SHE... fought a savage battle to stay alive in the ghetto!
HE... studied the Talmud at night!
While SHE burned the ghetto to the ground,
HE kindled the Sabbath candles!
Theirs was a love of passion, a torrid, sensual lust, fueled by those who said "NO!"
Samuel L. Bronkowitz presents... CLEOPATRA SCHWARTZ!
"It was a dream of extraordinary magnitude!" (hides flamethrower)
transongeist.com
"Never before has the beauty of the sexual act been so crassly exploited."
share"If The Poseidon Adventure was chilling was chilling(CHILLS!in big letters),if The Towering Inferno was thrilling(THRILLS!in big letters),you will be scared *beep*(SCARED *beep* in big letters)by That's Armegeddon."Donald Sutherland's clumsy waiter was classic physical comedy.
The newscast while the couple got down & dirty was great.
"Jesus,did a cow *beep* in here?"
The courtroom drama parody was very funny.(Jim McKay was host of a show like that before Wide World of Sports.)
I loved the whole movie.