I mean the knee-jerk reaction is probably to say yes but here's an example that makes me wonder. A coworker told me that another coworker had been talking unkindly about me behind my back. It served no positive purpose and only hurt my feelings. Did I really need to know that?
share No, that is a falsehood, what your coworker did was stir drama. NEVER tell that person anything that will feed their weird need to start trouble
Sometimes white lies are required to keep the ship afloat
Yes, a lot of damage can be done from the drama associated with "just being honest".
shareImagine some guy’s wife getting her hair done and buying a new outfit asking him, ‘do I look really good?’
Even if she looked like Miss Piggy
He’d tell her she looked super sexy.
The truth can sometimes cause trouble.
Indeed it can. 😁
shareWhen it comes to a question like that,I ask if they want the truth or something that sounds good?
shareOf course not. But it usually is, though not at all rarely, isn't.
shareExcessive honesty in not the best policy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9AwrqMA0O9o
Interesting clip with a lot of truth in it. I'm not sure I've ever heard the term "excessive honesty", but their reasoning made a lot of sense.
shareSome people use the excuse of 'I'm just being honest' to be rude and obnoxious. Honesty is not a shield against social niceties.
I don't think honesty is always the best policy. I think avoiding lying is a good idea. But they're not necessarily the same thing. And, in any case, everybody lies from time, even if it's just out of kindness or tact.
As for your colleague telling you someone has been talking about you behind your back, this has happened to me too. And my immediate reaction is 'He was talking about me, not to me. I don't need to know about it.' Because, well, it's just unnecessary shit-stirring, isn't it?
Indeed it is, and this particular shyte-stirrer has quite the history of shyte-stirring. 🤢
And I also know that human beings are complicated and that it's possible in a weak moment to say something unkind behind someone else's back and still like them overall. She shouldn't have said it but I shouldn't have heard it (second-hand) either. Now sadly, it will always be in the back of my mind when I interact with her. 👎
It's more of an ideal saying than it is a practical one.
Cynically, honesty is the best when you're bad at telling lies. People are going to spot a poorly told lie.
Philosophy assumes all ideas and thoughts work in pursuit of their own self-interests.
Honesty can backfire in a self-driven environment.
This saying works best in a high trust society where there's a lot of cohesion; everyone works on the same thing towards the same goal (like a sports race team) because a lie in this situation has untold consequences, usually at the expense of all.
~~/o/
Not always, but usually is. Do you really think that discovering a hidden enemy served no positive purpose? How naive! I've always had enemies on the job and there's no worse enemy than a two-faced co-worker or a false friend. I've had lots of episodes like that, they always led me to directly confront the person, and I'm grateful to the other co-workers who had the integrity to bring it to my attention.
shareI think it depends on the character of the person sharing the information as to whether or not integrity was involved. Sadly some people are pot stirrers and it soothes their soul to stir the pot.
shareThat's a grey area that requires discernment but with my experiences, my direct confrontations always yielded positive results.
Well....it's one thing if someone requests you be honest, but often being brutally honest can be a social minefield, even among friends and family. There are other situations where you're honest about how you feel, or what you've learned about the truth of something, and people personally attack you despite you not intending to be cruel or nasty, and just telling a universal truth nobody wants to hear.
It's one reason Machiavelli is misunderstood. Many people see him as "evil" for the book he wrote, when in fact, he was just doing an honest take on politics in his home country during the time he was alive, and they are themes that still remain relevant to this day. I don't think he was a bad person, just brutally honest.