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Losing a loved one and how it is...


Has anyone here ever lost a loved one and found it hard to get rid of some of their stuff? I found it hard to get rid of some of my mom's stuff. I get choked up.

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You have to do it in a detached, business-like manner, then, the next day, cry for 20 minutes.

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Thanks.

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Been there.....

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Yes it is difficult. Been there.

God Bless

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Lost my dad many years ago. He was younger than I am now (which is still hard for me to get my head round). Had to clear a lot of stuff. So very hard. I still have some.

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I've lost several loved ones, but the responsibility for the human loved ones' stuff didn't fall on me.

When my paternal grandma died, my aunt (dad's older sister) took over figuring out what to do with grandma's things.

When each of my grandpas died (on both sides of the family) other family members took over what to do with their things. When mom's dad died, grandma kept some of his stuff for herself, and gave other things to family members or sold things.

Now in the case of our pets, I think when our guinea pig died we didn't have difficulty getting rid of her cage or anything in it, because it would have been too painful a reminder. We had no use for a large cage, a water bottle, a large PVC elbow pipe, a little blue food dish, or the pine shavings. We adopted a dog the very next day after she died.

In the case of our last three dogs, things were interesting for each one.

When our Alaskan Malamute, Aspen died, I think my brother kept her collar and tags, we stored her doghouse away in the garage, and I have no idea what we did with her food dish. I think we threw away her water bucket because it was old, dirty, and the handle was broken.

For our Husky/German Shepherd Mix, Ginger, we kept all her stuff and our next dog, a Siberian Husky named Domino, inherited most of it. He got to have all her bandanas (we love putting handkerchiefs around our dogs' necks), her water tank/bowl, and the scoop/dish we used for food. He was not allowed to wear her pink, girly collar, or any of her pink bandanas, and he did not like sleeping in her kennel, so we had to store that in the garage with Aspen's dog house. Her tennis balls did not interest him, so we didn't bother getting Domino any new toys.

Domino passed away early in 2021, so we still have most of his stuff, but we've had to store some of it away. We haven't gotten a new dog yet, though I don't think the new dog will get a lot of his things. I had to cut his collar off of him at the vet's so my brother only kept the tags (I have Domino's first tag, which we exchanged for a soft one because it was so noisy when he shook himself, my brother has the soft tag). We stored Domino's pillow bed in the garage. I think we might be able to recycle Ginger's kennel and water tank/dish, but I'm gonna have to get the new dog their own food dish.

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I’m in the same situation. My parents died in 2009 and 2014 and I inherited their home. It is full of there stuff that I have a hard time getting rid of. The only suggestion I can make is to do it slowly over time.

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