What would you think if someone told you that you aren't a good match because of your job? Let's say, you had been intimate (had sex) on one occasion, and by all accounts both of you were satisfied with how it went. But they say their looking for someone with a job more like their's. And what if you were somewhat happy at your job and it was an alright paying important job. But they still said this.
shareI would say it’s an excuse. Although some people are really anal about jobs. My best friend got dumped by a girl while he was in college because he worked at 7-11.
shareSometimes the kind of job is important. One of my friend can't stand his girlfriend's job. She works in a bank. He's more adventurer kind of guy so he wants to move alot doing travelling and doing odd jobs here and there, then move on to different parts of the world, living in shacks, etc. While she wants to stay in one place building her career and living in a large house.
Being a couple isn't just about the sex.
After years of listening to others and my own experiences, I think we underestimate the importance of sex. I think it's very crucial for a healthy relationship.
shareNever change for anybody. If they can't accept you for who you are they are not the right person for you, no matter how unfair it seems.
sharePersonally I think it's just a convenient excuse to tell someone that. But as far as never wanting to change goes, I think sometimes that's wrong also. For instance, if someone starts to gain lots of weight and is becoming obese, that's unacceptable. And if your significant other wants you to care like you should, that's good. And if the person getting fat thinks it should be okay to say "accept me as I am", well that's the wrong attitude.
shareYeah but not before you start dating someone.
shareI don't that's specific enough to respond to. It can't be based solely on the job, but something that the job entails, like long hours that mean you won't see each other often, or a conflict of interest between the companies you both work for, etc. Or if you work in an abattoir and the person is a vegetarian, there's a moral component to it. Just saying I want someone in the same field is too vague to respond to. Just let that person go, I'd say.
shareI'd think 'Jeez, I hope my wife doesn't hear about this!'
I kid, I kid🙃!
what was the job? hitman?
shareI think you just dodged a bullet!
You don't say what the issue is, but if this person has ethical or political objections to your job, they don't think you earn enough money to maintain the lifestyle they want, or just doesn't think it's cool enough, then the relationship will not work. And whatever you do, do NOT try to change your life to please this person!
Remember: Sex is great, but our genitals will not lead us to people who will make good long-term partners. Our genitals have a different agenda.