would YOU be OK with your 16 year old daughter having sex & smoking pot? - Better Things (2016) Discussion

[–] MissAgnes 8 years ago

Pam is a liberal and since this show is basically based on her real life I can see her allowing it since most liberals believe in being liberal in how they raise their kids.

reply

[–] ColinInLa 8 years ago

since most liberals believe in being liberal in how they raise their kids.

Any facts to back up this gross generalization?

--------------------
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

reply

[–] RetiredNLovinIt1209 8 years ago

As long as we're generalizing here, most conservatives are idiots who actually believe Donnie Drumpf should be president.

reply

[–] dperth-33500 8 years ago

That was not an intelligent thing to add, making you the idiot in this conversation.

reply

[–] SweaterCannons 8 years ago

Jesus, what is it with people dragging politics into everything? Are you serious? Are you and TheGrindfather poster the same person? Is your life so awful that you've become this bitter, small person that can only gripe about "liberals"? FX is a Fox property, you know, maybe you could take some consolation in that. Or if you're so bothered by Pam's politics, maybe you could just stick with that other Fox property, Fox News. Whatever you do, just know that you're annoying as hell.

Christ.

reply

[–] mrmad2001 8 years ago

In episode 3 she sets up an escort service for her daughter...

reply

[–] MissAgnes 8 years ago

Seriously?

reply

[–] ldlamb74 8 years ago

I doubt it

reply

[–] P-rock52 8 years ago

She's watching her daughter go through exactly what she went through and has to toe the parent/friend line

reply

[–] otter68 8 years ago

parents are NOT friends to their children. They are mentors, role models, and disciplinarians, not friends.
When parents try to be BFF with their kids, the kids suffer

Don't hate on contrarians

reply

[–] cinsmith1 8 years ago

There's actually nothing wrong with being both as long you aren't a friend when your kid needs you to be a parent.

reply

[–] geezwhatnext 8 years ago

That is a great answer! ITA.

reply

[–] lubin-freddy 8 years ago

It doesn't matter if you're okay with it or not. As if the kids care. So it's a normal, albeit problematic, attitude of "don't ask, don't tell".

This isn't the Cosby Show, where everything was supposed to be ideal, and parents were, even if a bit funny, always wise. But then again, speaking of Cosby....

What can be asserted without evidence can also be dismissed without evidence.

reply

[–] corry-helmond 8 years ago

It doesn't matter if you're okay with it or not. As if the kids care. So it's a normal, albeit problematic, attitude of "don't ask, don't tell".

This isn't the Cosby Show, where everything was supposed to be ideal, and parents were, even if a bit funny, always wise. But then again, speaking of Cosby....

In this particular situation, I appreciated the mothers thought. She's working her butt of, and has to deal with a lot of different child-age related problems.
The last thing she needs at that very moment are the complex matters of teenage experimenting/freedom.
But it touches another issue as well. In her own youth these topics were not or less commonly addressed in a family situation. As teenager you didn't discuss everything with your parents, while nowadays every topic is spoken about at the dinner table and parents want to be more "friends" than parents.
Perhaps "don't ask, don't tell" isn't always so bad......

Appreciate your Cosby reference. LOL

reply

[–] monkeyalien 8 years ago

^^^ This ^^^

I loved how Max was being so open and honest to which Sam responded "No! Hide things from me!". Not that it was the wisest response, but it's not surprising coming from an over-stressed single parent. It's a big difference from the Cosby Show format following TGIF stuff that I grew up watching with "special episodes" that touched upon serious stuff but were so unrealistic. I've seen what happens when kids don't feel like they can talk so openly to their parents & sneak around, and the parents try to catch them. I've seen what happens when parents shelter their kids to the point that when the kids to rebel they do so in spectacular fashion and one could argue much worse than if the parents gave them a little breathing room.

(this signature was absent on picture day)

reply

[–] corry-helmond 8 years ago

Well that depends.
As a mother you'd rather see your kids stay "kid" for a much longer time, when we're talking drugs and sex.
At the same time you expect your child to act as a "grown up" in all other situations.
Quite hypocrite when you're honest, isn't it?

Regarding drugs: education first; but if they want to try pot, it better be at home than elsewhere.
Regarding sex: education and morals first. Same rules apply to boys and girls!
You can't do more than that as a parent - and keep your fingers crossed. :D

reply

[–] burnthebeautiful 8 years ago

I agree with this. At 16, a kid is less than 2 years away from legally being an adult. They're too old to be held on a leash with strict rules, if you ban them from doing something they'll just do it anyway behind your back. The best thing you can do is try to be honest and educate them about the risks without exaggerating.

reply

[–] otter68 8 years ago

the effects of drugs and alcohol on the adolescent brain are not the same as the adult brain.
A parent should do what they can to steer their kids away from drugs and alcohol, but as I know from my youth, I drank behind my parents' backs, but if they found out about it, they would NOT have been cool with it. Then again, they didn't talk to me about drugs and alcohol at all when I was a teen.

Don't hate on contrarians

reply

[–] corry-helmond 8 years ago

the effects of drugs and alcohol on the adolescent brain are not the same as the adult brain.

True if you speak of continuous use.

IMHO The major point is to teach your children how to deal with alcohol and (soft)drugs.
I'm from the Netherlands, where the situation is different than in most other countries, but the problem remains the same.
Surely you won't encourage kids to do alcohol or drugs; so first comes education.
Consuming alcohol still is considered "normal" and at least social.
What is forbidden is interesting and tempting. If you allow your child an occasional drink at festive occasions - and yourself not consuming more than two drinks EVER in their presence - they're more likely to treat a drink for what it is: something that could be part of a festive occasion.

What I really don't get are those reality TV-shows about teens/young-adults like "Party down South", "Ex on the beach" or "Rich Kids of ...". Which idiot allows this, is beyond my comprehension.

Then again, they didn't talk to me about drugs and alcohol at all when I was a teen.

Exactly. Have you ever asked them later on in life why?
Very curious to hear that.

reply

[–] otter68 8 years ago

No, never asked them why. Maybe it's because I'm the youngest of seven, and none of my siblings every got into trouble for it. Also, my parents rarely drank in front of us. They also taught us to obey the law and respect their rules. If they ever found I drank, their disappointment in me would be the worse punishment they could have given me. Letting my parents down was a big cloud I had to carry around when it happened. It was worse than being grounded.

Don't hate on contrarians

reply

[–] corry-helmond 8 years ago

Thank you.
I think you had a good youth; with six siblings above you the conduct code was solidly set and parents tend to trust upon that - so no reason to discuss the topic.
(forgetting that the youngest might try something because of the trust the parents have in him. LOL) I recognize the feeling of not wishing to disappoint; so embarrassing.

reply

[–] stewieboy2008 8 years ago

Yeah exactly I seen the commercial for this show and the daughter looks like 15 and she's talking openly about smoking pot to her own mother. Sex too? Wow. And how is this funny? Bad parenting I'd say. It's just dumb and not funny.

reply

[–] dperth-33500 8 years ago

According to this link, Max is 18, not 16.

http://hiddenremote.com/2016/09/07/fall-tv-16-new-faces-to-watch/5/

As Max, the teenage daughter of a beleaguered single working mom (Pamela Adlon), Madison ups the angst factor to eleven. At first, Max is painted as a typical – yet very open – teenage girl. She begs her mother to score weed for her, has co-ed sleepovers right under her mom’s nose, and blows off school so she can party.

Throughout the first few episodes of the series, Max floats through life as an acerbic and opposing force in the household. She seems to be selfish, rude, and self-centered. However, layers are pulled back as the series progresses and her character begins to take on nuance. Madison slowly reveals vulnerabilities and insecurities in Max that remind us all that no one has it all figured out at eighteen.

Edit: In episode 2x02 Sam says that Max is 16. So the above article probably made a mistake of some kind. Perhaps Pamela's real daughter is the one who is 18.

reply

[–] KinksRock 8 years ago

She's definitely 16. She mentions in last night's episode that she will be 18 in two years, and she feels like she has already blown it.

Jaan Pehechan Ho

reply

[–] dperth-33500 8 years ago

Yeah I saw it too and I agree. So whoever wrote the article made a mistake. Maybe 18 is the age of Pamela's real daughter.

reply

[–] KinksRock 8 years ago

Maybe she wishes her daughter was not having sex, but is grateful that at least she is using condoms. Sometimes you need to be thankful for your kids being responsible, even if they are not doing exactly what you want. Example: If your kid drinks alcohol, but he and his friends have a designated sober driver. You'd just be grateful they are being responsible, even though you wish you could keep them from drinking (and no, sometimes you just can't).

Jaan Pehechan Ho

reply