What if he leaps into the showrunner of this show
...and his mission is to come up with something fucking original instead of dragging another old franchise up and ruining its name?
shareThat’s actually pretty good👏🏻
shareI kinda wish I could see such an episode now...
BEN SONG: Where am I?
ADDISON: It looks like you've leaped into the body of Bryan Wynbrandt, a hack television writer at Universal Content Productions, in the year 2021. Ziggy says there's a 99% possibility you're here to stop his writing partner Steven Lilien from rebooting an iconic 1990s TV series. The godawful pitch they put out for the reboot was greenlit.
BEN SONG: Why so bad? What happens if the show airs?
ADDISON: Apparently, the reboot doesn't even use the star of the original in even a cameo. They gender-swap the co-star, race swap the main character, and decide the little guy with bad breath who is a reoccurring character in the original show should instead be a "non-binary person to represent the LGBTQ community"
BEN SONG: Yikes! What happens to that pile of trash once audiences see it?
ADDISON: According to Ziggy, the show only lasts 30 episodes and gets cancelled after two seasons, forever tarnishing the legacy of the brilliant original series because it has the same name.
BEN SONG: Oh boy...
Translation: Boo hoo they rebooted a show I used to like, but I'm old and it's not the same... BOO HOOOOOOOOOOOO....... :-P
I don't know what people expect of a reboot to a show that aired 30 years ago... Obviously it's going to be different... SOCIETY is different than it was in the late 80s/early 90s... Newer generations aren't going to appreciate the old characters and storylines in this day and age. And unfortunately, they pretty much dictate what is and is not successful. Sooo... The writers adapt. Unfortunately, this show rebooted at the absolute worst time: the rise of Trumpism and "MAGA," which is currently trying to do everything in its power to take us back to the time when women and minorities had no rights... So many people are all anti-woke, anti-LGBT, hyper-masculine/hyper-feminine, hyper left-wing, hyper right-wing... We're a society living in extremes; it's not always easy to make a show that everyone likes. Probably more so than it was in the 90s.
You see what you expect to see. If you expect to see trash, you're gonna find it no matter how good it is. I saw the show a different way; a "passing of the torch" from one generation to another. Nothing wrong with that, as long as it's not pissing on the original... And I don't see how they did that at all with this series.
BEN SONG (trying to talk the NBC execs into going back to the drawing board): Look guys, I'm all for "diversity" too, but you can't introduce a "non-binary" character just for the sake of having one and then "only cast a real-life LGBTQ community member to represent them", it has to be organic...
STU PIDDIGOT, NBC PRODUCER: Nonsense! What are you, some guy of MAGA cheerleader?? Don't you realize this is the 21st century now? Audiences LOVE non-binary characters! We need to have one just for the sake of having one, the most important thing is diversity, not good writing! Why are you against DIVERSITY?!
BEN SONG (to ADDISON): It's not working, they really can't see how shallow and pathetic their pitch is. They seem to think I'm "anti-diversity" and a "Trump fanboy" if I point out the writing sucks...
ADDISON: That's the problem with leaping back to 2021. The Covid pandemic caused mass insanity for a while. You've got to find another way to reach them, Ben...
BEN SONG: Hey, hold on! Did you hear the script is written by a Zionist who supports the genocide of Palestinians?? I heard he donated to Netanyahu, too!
STU PIDDIGOT, NBC PRODUCER: I think the reboot will last AT LEAST seven seasons. In fact, I smell a few Emmy nods and -- WAIT A MINUTE?!?! WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY? We can't let a script by a known Zionist go into production! We will ALWAYS stand with the Palestinian people! That's a promise from NBC's shared values!
ADDISON: Whew, that was a close one, Ben. These pandering fools in the entertainment industry are their own worst enemy.
Is it pandering, really? Or is it just fair representation? Just because you want to pretend the LGBTQ+ community doesn't exist, doesn't give you the right to demand their absence from your life. They're on screen, they're in your neighborhood, they work at the stores you shop at... They're literally everywhere now. Deal with it.
A whole cast worth of Cisgender characters and all you can think about is the one gender non-conforming character... I weep for the future of mankind. JFC...