It's hard enough knowing that you're adopted, then having to be constantly reminded about it, having your creepy ass biological parents essentially stalk you, and always talk about you even though they are basically strangers to you.
It's incredibly creepy and predatory to act and behave this way.
If I were Carly's parents I would be mortified by MTV and Tyler and Catelynn and would want to protect my child from being exposed to that type of exploitation. Every time these two bring up Carly her adoptive parents have to worry about what they said, how it affects Carly, will she see it on tv, will someone at school tell her, will she be made fun of, etc. and so on and so forth.
And then you have to worry about when she becomes a teenager and when the terrible teens come in and how Carly could say something like 'you're not my real parents!', or 'I'm going to go live with my biological parents', etc. It totally undermines the adoption process.
It literally skeeves me and grosses me out every time I see these two vent about the little girl they put up for adoption.
That's literally all Carly is to them, and it should stay that way.
Can you imagine the mind-f--- Catelynn would induce on Carly is she had one on one time with her or something?
NO WAY!
I'm sorry, but it's difficult to adjust and accept your adoptive family, even when adopted from birth, like I was, while knowing you're adopted, without having to worry about your biological parents coming around to check up on you like some aliens abductioners.
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couragecash
8 years ago
I agree! She's only 7 years old and I'm sure she's starting understanding certain situations. Cate and Tyler wanting to visit her yearly would be a major *beep* for Carly.
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Katiedidd
8 years ago
I so agree with everything you said. If you don't mind me asking, what do you think of open adoptions for some people? Say... the egg and sperm donors are nothing like Catelynn and Tyler, and they actually don't carry unhealthy obsessions with the child, and they actually understand/respect their role? I used to hope Catelynn and Tyler would be those people one day, and initially I thought the visits early on were a good idea, but I'm starting to wonder if closed adoptions are for the best in almost all situations. While it is nice to see the baby is thriving and happy, maybe having it open just keeps the wound open. Not to mention, once the child is older, it runs the risk of being unfair to them. I know it's easy for some fans of the show to focus on C&T, but Carly is the real one to think about.
And because all people see is C&T complaining, they forget that B&T are the real parents. I also have to say I'm also not buying C&T were 16 and didn't realize what they were signing. In season one or two of TM, it was acknowledged that the adoption was "semi-open." They always knew it was some pictures and yearly visits at most; there'd be no "joint custody" kind of nonesense someday. They could fantasize about having a parental role, but they knew from the start what the reality was.
And maybe that's the problem with open adoptions: continued contact--even in semi-open adoptions--blur the lines for many. I'm interested to know what you think about open-adoptions in general. Can it ever be healthy for the child? Should it stop when they're babies or never begin in the first place? Would continued pictures but no visits be where the line should be drawn? That way the child isn't affected, but the gamete donors get to have updates on the child. Or maybe purely closed adoptions are better for all concerned as a general rule...
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