Best Dean Learner/Thornton Reed quotes - Garth Marenghi's Darkplace (2004) Discussion

[–] Francine_Pefko 18 years ago

I love the Dean Learner line in the first episode when he discusses how his cat was "a write-off".
I can't remember the exact quote but it slays me ;-)

"May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one."

reply

[–] irishpatrick11 18 years ago

th-rach thats my favourite line too!!! I seem to recall it's:

"I had a cat once, dropped a sofa on it. It was a write off so I stood on it's head"

I nearly die everytime I hear it!!!

---'Gimme a Martini, would'ya?'---

reply

[–] sheamusNB 18 years ago

'My mother, God rest her. She's not dead but let's hope God gives her some rest.'

Just always cracks me up that line, it's in the extra interviews on the DVD which are just really funny.

reply

[–] The_Frederick 18 years ago

Reed: Understood?
Dagless: As crystal.

reply

[–] Ghostshadow187 17 years ago

The one where Dagless & Sanchez give Reid's number as a masseuse service. It was such a great pisstake of those "funny" bits at the end of the A-team or Knight Rider.
"Hello yes?? I keep telling you that's not my bag."

The first episode when they're at the graveyard, & they cut away to Reid & he's at a completely different location with a shotgun firing away then they cut back to Dagless & he's gotten a flamethrower from somewhere.

"Garth is the most significant artistic force I've worked with...and I've worked with Lulu...& four other people."

The BMX chase in apes of wrath
"I thought I'd lost you back there!!"

Republicans dont watch stand up, theyre busy watching cartoons, trying to see who's gay.

reply

[–] fastdub 17 years ago

sanchez
"weRE gonna pop down to see the poor guy. wanna come with ?"
thornton
"NO"

its the delivery and the set up that blows me away

reply

[–] teamcream 17 years ago

"Personally, I think, from the age of 13 and up... turn the other way. It's not a popular view I know."

I am an genius

reply

[–] DarrenDirt 16 years ago

Ghostshadow187 WINS!

- - -

Chipping away at a mountain of pop culture trivia,
Darren Dirt.

reply

[–] dawn-stanney 17 years ago

After Garth finishes off his mate with a shovel,

"If that's how you treat your friends I dread to think how you treat you enemies, worse I'd expect"

We live for The One, we die for The One.

reply

[–] diskoboy1974 17 years ago

"I can't hold these plates off much longer, Liz! Why don't you help instead of standing there dreaming about lipstick?"

reply

[–] mindsoulja 11 years ago

winner winner chicken dinner

reply

[–] Ghostiejo 17 years ago

The whole 'episodes were running 8 minutes short' talk gets me everytime.

"Anything without dialogue was considered for slow motion"

reply

[–] sehaitt 17 years ago

"Cool it Sanchez or you'll get a knuckle supper!"

---
Jesus would back me up on this I think.
"Dually noted." - My boss

reply

[–] sim_hardacre 17 years ago

anything from the 'scotch mist' episode cracks me up
..." you god damned evil misty jocks"
..." please accept this shortbread, i'm afraid i can't offer you any salt to go with that" (something like that)

and his description of Glasgow is priceless

reply

[–] Fangmacher 17 years ago

The entire part where he tries to justify punching a child actor is hilarious.

reply

[–] jimjamjames 17 years ago

They go a little something like this! -

1 - As I turned the corner, I felt muscular and compact - like corned beef.

2 - (Shoots shotgun rifle in the air) compose yourselves!! this is a hospital.

3 - Liz?! Give us a hand and stop thinking about lipstick.

reply

[–] THE_Uberto_Bartono 17 years ago

She's smooth, like ice, cold to the touch and it isn't very nice, when you left alone, you let them treat you badly, leaves you hanging on the phone, take off. shove you loving to the wheel, put the pedal to the floor, cos your heading for the hills, got to get away, cant take it no more, man you don't need this leave it, leave it, leave at the door,

team DDWZJMSRJMU - GET THE "F" Out Taking this off when TNA finally gets a 3.5 rating Since 9/20/07

reply

[–] Lake908 17 years ago

Thornton: *after hanging up the phone*.....Goodbye....

Just the way he says it is hilarious!
Uberto you're on here too huh?

"But the temperature's too HIGH!"

Jeff Hardy: Captain Hold-My-Beer-And-Watch-This-$hit - SGTtype

reply

[–] 17 years ago

[deleted]

[–] THE_Uberto_Bartono 17 years ago

Yep, I'm a new fan after seeing this show a few times while I was drunk usually I'd turn it on half way and be to shi+faced to understand the show let alone pay attention, so I recorded the episode and when I got really high I would watch them, and just laugh so hard.

Dagless: Don’t drink that! Look, it’s bright green.
Reed: Thank God I only took a tiny sip.

team DDWZJMSRJMU - GET THE "F" Out Taking this off when TNA finally gets a 3.5 rating Since 9/20/07

reply

[–] LuckyGingersnap 17 years ago

Dagless favorite quote is "I'm not Jesus Chirst, I've come to accept that now"!

Who would win in a crazy fantasy fist-fight between Lizzie Borden and Anne Frank?

reply

[–] Louise2212 17 years ago

I love the way Reed says "I beg your pudding"
and the whole reasoning behind why he got into medicine in the first place

reply

[–] siwelk 17 years ago

Any quote in which Wan Ton is mentioned is golden.

"If Wan Ton heres about this. My ass is grass. And he's got a lawnmower, you dig?"

reply

[–] John_Allerdyce 17 years ago

I love how he says "Nowhere can be a lonely place to be."

____________________________________
I am 57% of StrangeEnchantedGirl's PM Inbox.

reply

[–] Goosehoundv2 17 years ago

lake908 "Thornton: *after hanging up the phone*.....Goodbye...." lol yup followed by the close up shot and "flying objects..? "It beggars belief!" Classic.

"That gentleman has placed a deposit on this meat.. No.. a monetary deposit hahaha!"

reply

[–] Mental_Plague0 17 years ago

His quote about losing a technician or whatever to the mist. How they discovered it was poisonous after he died. Haha. Anyway, he basically talks about how if someone's gonna die on set it might as well be them because another will just come and nobody really cares anyway. : P

All glory to the Hypnotoad.

reply

[–] goats_head_soup 17 years ago

"If Wan Ton catches wind of this he'll be all over me like knockers in a wind tunnel!"

"I'm with Dag 110% on this. That means I could backtrack 10%, and still completely support him."

reply

[–] GohiLabrie 17 years ago

People need to stop quoting Dagless in this thread.

Thornton > Dagless

reply

[–] cutie1309 17 years ago

She was like a candle in the wind... Unreliable.

Gets me every time

Oh and

I said to Garth, I looked him straight in the face. I've never been afraid to hold a mans gaze. It's natural.

Genius

reply

[–] acetremendous 16 years ago

I might not get this exactly, but the general idea is:

I'm not going to call up his mother and tell her that we have to burn her son to close the gates of hell. I'm just not going to do it.

The way he delivers that is priceless.

Everything quoted above is great too.

*********************************************
* "We may be stupid, but we're not clever!" *

reply

[–] smeg_head 16 years ago

"He's right sanch, one of the main reasons I went into medicine was for the laughs, that and the pussy, and that dried up ten year ago if you'll pardon the expression."

reply

[–] movie_punk 16 years ago

I was hooked the very first time I saw garth "heroically" scuttling from the ambulance, baby in arms, and springing into a flip just as the ambulance exploded.

Of course the random shotgun shooting at the funeral and I beg your pudding are some of my favs.

What I love about this show is that it feels like a live action version of one of those cheesy late 70s/early 80s japanese anime shows....the ones with the really horrible english dubs.

-i need a nap-

reply

[–] behereyes 16 years ago

I crack up everytime I see that scene where he picks up the phone and goes "Uh huh...Bye"

I was willing to give you whatever life you wanted...just to keep you out of mine!

reply

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]