I mean, she saw/knew him first (in a way). I know it's a childish logic, but to the ladies of this forum, don't you think Alex had every reason and rights to do what she had to do? It happened to me before. And I did the exact same thing (except I didn't steal my friend's name and apartment and her life). But yeah.
sharei think everybody should have a fair shot. thts all! if you have done tat, den i think you should at least fight a fair game. not good to do so.
shareI felt sorry for her...and I also felt sorry for Matt's friend...basically they both got hurt...the only differenc is that Matt's friend didn't deserve it that much. Alex was a really cute and kind person...but she fell in love and did everything to break them apart...if you do that your relationship with the person is doomed to failure. Altough I did not like what she did....I felt sorry for her at the end...and if it were reality (which almost looked like - realistic movie) I'd try to make her smile... ;)
shareRights???? What she had to do????
These are polar opposites! With rights, go obligations, not compulsions that control you. This line of thinking makes the “Son of Sam” heroic. He did what he had to do! He had a right to follow his inner voices! Where do you draw the line with your rights, when you poison someone, or frame them so they end up in prison for the rest of their life??? And your justification is that she can't control herself, because she wants what she wants, and consequently she has no obligation to give a flip about anyone else. Are you saying that if you are so self-centered and abandoned of all self-control that you have no alternative BUT to satisfy your compulsive cravings without regard for anyone else – and that is OK??? A person like Alex is in need of the greatest compassion because she has been completely abandoned by what it means to be human. Any dog has more character than she displayed, and dogs are still wearing oversized canines for holding their prey down while they tear them to shreds. The simplest rule for human conduct is to ask your self the question -"How would I like this if it were happening to me?" If you don't like the answer and do it anyway, you are not fit for human company. Alex is one of the most dramatic examples of how NOT TO BE that I have seen in film in a long time. You don't have to go to Shakespeare (ironic, no?) to find the most depraved treachery. This film is contemporary, so it stops short of poison and daggers.
Sorry, I guess I kinda lost it.
Human nature is paradoxical. If you love someone, you should want what is best for him or her. In Alex’s case that would mean that she should remove herself as far as possible from the situation, because she is a malignant curse. First, she wrecked two lives because she didn't get what she wanted. And that was without prospect of turning it to her advantage. It was simply to wreck their relationship. Then two years later, she wanted to trick Matt into thinking that she was something that she was not, so she could sell him this bag of sh it that she was. Would you give someone you love a bag of sheet after tearing out of their hands a bag of gold? She didn't love Matt - she only loved herself. But if she would really see the situation for what it was and want to remove herself, if she would have that much capacity for self–sacrifice, then she wouldn’t be a bad person at all, but someone deserving of admiration and support; someone whose company was valuable and whom you would want to be near. You get what is most valuable in life, by giving – not by taking.
I too sympathised with Alex and this is why; Matt was similar to her in how she felt and what she did. Matt loved Lisa almost to the point of obsession and after she left he broke down, actually shutting down his emotions to where he wasn't living his life anymore because the person he loved was gone, and after being given a chance of getting her back lies to and betrays his fiance to track her down. Alex did what she did in desperation of wanting to be loved the way she loved Matt, the way Matt loved Lisa. Now, saying she had the right to do what she did may be going to far. But she only acted on her emotions, which was, in my opinion, her only fault. It is a hypocritical notion to compare her to dogs, and what does it mean to be human? To be wanted and loved by what we love. That was all she wanted. She acted on what characterizes humans, therefore, I guess that makes us all dogs with oversized canines to simply be able to take what we want, no? Yes, that is a simple rule for human conduct, from both point-of-views, Alex and Lisa's. Who is to say Lisa wouldn't have done the same thing if she was in Alex's place? If you don't answer the question truthfully than you are not fit for human company. Shakespear is the greatest example we can go to because he, most of all, understood human nature, about which you shouldn't make assumptions!
Yes, human nature is paradoxical. When you love someone you do what you can to make him/her love you in return. It is naive to say that everyone does what is best for that person. In Alex's case she did what she thougt she had to do in order to have Matt love her the way she did him, because she thought she was best for him. It was only a story of how unfair love can be. And how she was a victim of that unfairness. She did love Matt, but Matt didn't love her, that was the tragedy. In the end she did let go, which was her sacrifice, which was the sadest part of the whole movie. She's has my admiration and support, because in the end she knew she couldn't have him, and she let go. She gave back by letting go of what was most valuable to her, but everything was taken from her. The unfair tragedy of life and love.
Without going too deep into the philosophy, why I bring the dogs into the equation is to illustrate the difference between the character of instinctive impulses and the character of a human who exercises discrimination, judgment, and self control in spite of them - good or bad. A good dog has extra-ordinary qualities that resemble human characteristics; loyalty, courage, self-sacrifice among them. He acts however out of pure instinct, and without circumspection. I am one of those people who likes to think that we are not compelled by our instincts. The fact that few exercise that option, has no impact on my assessment that as an option, it does exist. To say that she had no option, in my evaluation, is to say that she did not exercise the option to think, feel, behave as a human but relegated herself to the animal kingdom. ...reminds me of Flip Wilson, "The devil made me do it!" Except that this is serious.
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke
The idea that dogs act only out of pure instinct is an often-stated, yet completely unproven, and not-very-strongly supported assumption that I think arises both out of a wish to downplay the human actions that come entirely or at least partly from instinct (to make us better than "animals") and to downgrade dogs for the same reason. At least from the evidence of observations of dogs dogs make choices every day (a dog of mine had great difficulty deciding whether she would rather watch television or eat her dinner that was being served at the same time, but finally -- if unsurprisingly -- decided she would rather eat dinner; dogs decide they would rather come in or go out on the porch, &c.) and this should be a no-brainer to anyone who's ever lived with dogs. It's a dialectical distinction rather than a binary one (probably, dogs act _more_ on instinct than we do). But, again, we're probably too close to the question.
share"She gave back by letting go of what was most valuable to her, but everything was taken from her. "
I'm with you on sympathizing with the Alex character, however love isn't posessive. Nothing was taken away from her, she didn't give back squat, because she never had Matt's love ever. She didn't even have a prayer to hang on. She was just wasting her time over nothing. Worse, she gave in to obsession, lied to her friend, deceived the one she "love", and hurt the lives of two people. There's no way I can overlook that. I've had a chick who tried the same thing on me and my boyfriend, but my boyfriend saw through it.
Alex didn't really love Matt, she was obsessed with him, it's not the same, real love involves a mutual feeling and connection, obsessive love is posting your ideals on another person and expected them to forfill that. I've been on both sides of this coin and it hurts anywhich way unless you don't care at all. It never would have worked out between them coz Matt could never really have been the ideal person she imagined him to be and she never had the courage to take the chance to let him know the real her. She realises this when the two men watch her play and she says those Shakespeare lines with all her heart realising as she does that she's living a lie to herself as much as to everyone else. It's only after the play, in the restaurant that she is brave enough to come clean to everyone and let them free to live their lives. It's this realisation on her part that make her a sympathetic character and this a really beautiful movie.
After this movie I look out for Rose Bryne in any movie as this kind of complexity is far from easy to act plus she's gorgeous.
i thought this movie was kinda meh, but i'd totally watch it again because Rose is SO goddamn adorable.
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What she did was completely wrong and there was no reason involved. Her situation was quite unfortunate, but what she did was despicable. She should probably have told her friend exactly what the situation was instead of doing what she did. It's quite heartbreaking what happened, but sometimes feelings you have for someone are not reciprocated.
sharei thought she was completely insane, and i was very angry at her throughout the film.
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Alex deserved to die a slow horrible death and everything in life for her up until then should be hard. The difference be between her and the guy was that the guy tried to move on with life and when he was reminded about his soulmate, he did everything he could except ruin other people's lives to find her. What Alex didn't get was that she was emotionally unstable and the feelings between her and the dude were not mutual.
Anyone that behaves this way deserves what karma has coming to them. More power to true love, may the opposed spend eternity searching for what they will never find.
i completely agreee with you aleixa77, i couldnt havesaid it better
shareThe difference be between her and the guy was that the guy tried to move on with life and when he was reminded about his soulmate, he did everything he could except ruin other people's lives to find her.
Jetfire, Now from a certain standpoint you could rightly say that Matt owes Rebecca a little more, no - a lot more. And under other circumstances, she probably would have been given more. But, wrong time, wrong place... The clock was ticking and Lisa was about to board a flight for London. If Rebecca really knew him, she should have known something was wrong a long time ago. So it starts to get deep. The very first dialogue of the movie is with the jeweler. Matt knew what he was SUPPOSED to do. He was supposed to buy the ring, and marry the girl and everything that went along with it; the job, the condo, and finally the mini van in the suburbs. Proposing to Rebecca would just be another meaningless and empty link in the chain wrapping around his neck. The jeweler somewhat rhetorically (and prophetically) points out that the decision connected with the selection of that ring is made in a deeper place than the head. So Rebecca comes to represent the deadening world where everyone does "the right thing". Even if Matt hadn't run into Lisa again, he knew he was slowly dying, going down for the count and had to get out. And so in a certain sense Rebecca can't die over this, she is dead already. It was just a matter of time. To really resolve it well would have taken some time and it was not essential to the story. It was not about Rebecca and Matt. Rebecca was just part of the whole situation which Matt fell into when he lost his heart and his direction 2 years earlier. It is tragic to her for sure, and I personally can feel for her, but again, she should have sensed that something was not right a long time earlier. But she was pushy, just like her brother. On the phone when Matt says he is really out of it, he was obviously troubled. Her response was, "Well, you'd better get in it!" She just wasn't tuned in to who Matt really was and failed to read the warning signs. So in a certain sense she became "collateral damage". And again, Matt had to make a choice and move fast. Wrong time, wrong place for Rebecca. In a bad situation, there is sometimes only damage control, not prevention.
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke
Point well taken. I wasn't really paying close attention to the first 10 or so minutes. As for Matt owing Rebecca; I like to think he would at least attempted to make a more sincere, meaningful apology to her after he had finally cleared things up with Lisa. One thing I meant to point out in my previous post: Alex did finally do the right thing and confess to both Luke and Lisa. I feel she deserves at least a little credit for this. She could have just as easily left them all to figure things out themselves.
"Funny how your feet, in dreams, never touch the Earth" -Nancy Wilson
I definitely agree about Alex's turn at the end. She also leveled finally with Luke. So, she started to become so sick with herself that she was coming clean everywhere. A life "ain't over, 'til it's over", and Alex showed signs of finally starting to live one, instead of trying to manipulate one.
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke
That's the most retarded thing I've ever heard...it's a very childish thing to grab onto something or someone that doesn't belong to you in the first place. Do you honestly want to be with someone knowing that their feelings for you aren't mutual and that they like someone else? she liked him and he didn't like her back, big *beep* deal, happens every single day. I wouldn't even dream about doing that to a stranger never mind someone who is your friend.
shareI do sympathize for her to a point, I was in exactly the same position as she was a while ago, and although I was gutted the guy was with another girl (a stick thin blonde actually) , I didn't do anything about it and basically accepted that we wern't going to be together again. It hurt hearing about them 2 and seeing them but I never did anything along the lines of what Alex did, and believe me I loved this guy a lot. I knew I wasn't going to get him back so I left them too it. I wouldn't say she needed to die a horrible death or anything ridiculous like that, because she loved the guy and people are all different and this was probably her way of dealing with it (or something along those lines), but what she did wasn't right and she should have thought about who she was hurting before herself, therefore avoiding making two peoples lives a misery.
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You said "I knew I wasn't going to get him back," which gives the impression that you had something with this guy before he got with the blonde.
shareUnrequited love is one of the worst kinds of pain. Anyone who has been there knows that. The deep, penetrating, nagging pain, like a toothache in the soul that is always there, trickling through everything you do, through everyone encounter, through every moment can be maddening. But how does that explain why it is OK to introduce such torment into the lives of others as Alex did. Personal suffering is not a justification for immorality. If anything, she should have known best of all what she was doing.
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke
I felt very sorry for her; despite the horrible things she may have done, she was just in love--even if it was to the point of obsession.
"Au revoir, les enfants."
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It was pretty obvious that she was in love with him. She even said she was when she was at the table in the end with both Luke and Matthew.
"Go on Oprah and tell the world that I loved kittens."
-Veronica Mars
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The insane reasoning "but I loved him/her is the motivation behind many domestic murders and murder-suicides.
shareI bet in your case (and I HOPE in the case of the OP as well) that the guy in your personal situation at least knew you. In the film, Matt didn't even know Alex' name and had never laid eyes on Alex until he came back into town two years later. How does that give her any "rights" (as the OP says) to interfere in their relationship?
shareShe's a psycho. Period.
«Any of you *beep* pricks move, and I'll execute every *beep* last one of ya!» HB
she's a greedy bitch. I mean, so what if she saw the guy first? she knew her friend was completely in love with him, but she tried to keep them apart so she could have him. basicaly. So that's that. who would seriously do that to their friend over a guy? i know i wouldn't.
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