Why people DISLIKE this movie so much
Before I begin, I want to say that I really liked this movie... so much so that I had the movie's poster up in my college dorm room (not typical, as Cuckoo's Nest, Scarface and Reservoir Dogs posters were more common fare) and was nicknamed "the english patient" by friends.
However, there are many who DETEST this movie (as lampooned on Seinfeld), saying it's too long, too boring and too melodramatic. Back then, I could appreciate why they would say those things (different strokes for different folks). But until I recently re-watched it in full, I didn't understand why.
I think I now understand why...
The foundation of "getting into" and caring about this movie is the love between Almasy and Katherine. Everything that unfolds in the movie hinges on that idea hooking into your consciousness. If you don't believe in their relationship, then nothing else works.
For (American) movie-watchers, however, I believe Almasy and Katherine were much too boring, sexless, cold, and uninteresting to give two-craps about. Almasy is boring, doesn't like to talk, insulting to people in a not flirting way - I wouldn't want to spend 2 minutes with the guy. And, Katherine? A bit annoying, a bit of a prude, not all that attractive (let's be honest... KST looked like she was 50 years old when she was 33) - makeup and soft-lighting do wonders.
Their relationship sparks during an intense reading around the campfire. Really?? Much too blase of a start to this raging love that must sustain a close to three-hour movie.
Ultimately, I think it was miscast. Ralph Fiennes is good looking, but can't really pull off the "brooding" loner guy as well as other guys. Brad Pitt would've exuded that quality much more, but not sure if he could pull off a convincing accent. Plus, by that stage, Pitt had done his share of "brooding" leading men (River Runs Through It, Legends of the Fall).
As for KST, please see earlier comments. They needed a much younger and warm-blooded actress... someone who exudes more passion, sex and warmth.
Colin Firth was perfectly cast as the bumbling, "buddy" husband, but the two leads were not. I still loved the movie, but more warm-blooded actors in the lead roles could've made this movie one for the ages (instead of being the "artistic" film that got Elaine Benes angry enough to yell, "Just die already!" in a packed theater).