MovieChat Forums > Roseanne (1988) Discussion > favorite responses

favorite responses

posted 9 years ago by Ditto-head
18 replies | jump to latest

We had a thread awhile back for our favorite responses/comebacks, but since I couldn't find it, I thought I'd start it up again:

Reporter: But if eat fat, won't you get fat?

Roseanne: So? (I loved her delivery on that one.)

Roseanne: It's your fault I got fat in the first place.

Darlene: Oh yeah, like I invented double Dutch chocolate

Roseanne said something I don't remember

Darlene: What're you picking on me for? Did I take the last doughnut or something?

Roseanne inviting Todd to visit sometime

Kathy: After I recover from my operation.

Jackie: I didn't want this blow to be soft! This was the one! This was the one that COULD HAVE KILLED HER!

Roseanne: If you believe in reincarnation at all, this is not exactly the ideal time to KILL MOM!

Roseanne: If you're looking for a job, sorry, but we don't have an positions open for useless corporate suck ups.

Leon: Oh, I'm already employed. As a health inspector.

Roseanne: It's going to be really hard, finding a buyer in this market.
Bev: Oh, it wasn't that hard (looks over at Leon and smirks.)

Leon: She just kept lowering her price.

Roseanne: That's what you do! Bang, right for the alcohol!

Jackie: Well, have another shot of pancake, Roseanne.

[–] selenedm999 8 years ago

From the episode when they're wrestling and the couch breaks when Dan falls on it:

Roseanne: "Well there goes that family of kittens."

When Darlene is dyeing her hair in the sink and Molly asks her what she's doing.

Darlene: "Interpretive dance." (And sticks out one leg for effect).

My all-time favourite line is when Nancy says that Arnie is always complaining that she's smothering him.

Roseanne: "If you can still hear him whining, you're not holding the pillow down hard enough."

[–] jessicass 8 years ago

Roseanne: When? I've been watching you like a hawk.

Darlene: Hawks generally don't pass out on the couch after eating a quart of ice cream.

I'm tempting the wrath of the whatever, from high atop the thing.

[–] kristen1165 8 years ago

Roseanne: "You're grounded til menopause"
Darlene: "Yours or mine?"
Roseanne: "Your fathers"

[–] WhiteManFromTown1986 8 years ago

Roseanne picks up the phone.

Roseanne
Hello...Darlene It's for you.

Darlene
(Lazily laying on sofa)
Who is it?

Roseanne
(gruff)
Who is it?.........It's Marcy!

Darlene
What's she want?

Roseanne
I don't-
(Throws phone on floor)
-she wants you to pick up the phone!

[–] Edge1978 8 years ago

there are so many but here is one of my faves...

Roseanne walks in from work.

Dan- How could YOU DO that?
Roseanne- (yelling) BECAUSE I FELT LIKE IT THATS WHY!!
Dan: Do you even know what I am talking about?
Roseanne: (still yelling) No, but I don't like your tone!