How would you set it up? Say you had 5 screens. The rest of the theater is blank space.. What are all the things you'd do?
shareHaving a naked woman talk before each screening.
shareSounds like an incredibly pointless and thinly veiled attempt to sell tickets (I'd buy a season pass if available).
shareThe metoo movement would probably lit the cinema on fire sadly XD
sharewhat are you twelve?
shareNo, i just try to figure out what would make my movie theater draw in lots of money. And it seems it would work. I already sold a season pass to Sam above.
shareI'd prefer three screens to five. Five is too many. I prefer a cosier establishment. I'd have one big screen, showing more populist and/or family films (and maybe the occasional horror and cult classic during special late-night screenings), whilst the two smaller screens would show arthouse, classic and foreign fare.
I'd have a café/restaurant that only sold vegetarian and vegan, and ethically sourced foods. Definitely no meat, and a decent balance between dairy and non-dairy options. And a small lounge area with copies of the latest movie magazines (i.e. Sight and Sound, Empire, Little White Lies, etcetera) on display.
I'd utilise some space for a display cabinet filled with cinema memorabilia and, wherever possible, press kits for the films being screened (does anyone else remember when that was a thing at your local cinema?)
I’d just have 1 screen & would run it like a club, so all the members would vote what film they’d like to see next. There would be a fully licensed bar, plus snacks available. Also, since money was no object, there would be an honesty box, so you only pay what you think the film was worth. Finally, all idiots would receive a lifetime ban.
shareI love your ideas but regarding the idiot ban can you clarify if you mean idiots who do stupid (yet innocent enough) things like get their shirt caught in their zipper to a point that they have to walk around with a piece of shirt sticking out of their half-down zipper until they can locate either a new pair of pants or a pair of pliers? Because if that wouldn't be disqualifying you can count me in!
shareMate, people that do daft things like that would qualify for platinum membership! By idiots, I mean things like: -
Talking all the way through the film.
Shouting out spoilers.
Putting their shoes that have potentially trodden in dog shit on the back of a seat that someone’s head will eventually rest against - ewwwwww!
Throwing food on the floor on purpose.
Anything that could be considered anti-social.
Being silly is fine by me.
I share your distaste for dog-shit-covered shoes, but if they're putting their shoes on the back of the seat, would anyone really be eventually resting their head there? Unless they're like me, and they lean their head forward against the chair in despair, possibly because the film is bad, possibly because life.
Sorry for being a pedant. Are pedants allowed at your cinema?
Sometimes people actually dangle their legs over the seat in front, meaning that their heels are probably touching the area where someone will place their head (I’ll let you figure out the rest).
Pedants are welcome, as long as they are factual.
In addition, I would invite the person who nominated the winning film to do a short talk before the film started to say why they had nominated that particular film or to share any useful trivia (sans spoilers, naturally).
shareOne boldly unpopular move would be to ban food inside the theatre. I take my films seriously and I want to concentrate. I don't want to distract myself, much less have some pigs around me scruffling and shuffling, snapping their plastic and dropping their garbage on the floor. Snacks are a staple of the movie world, but not for me.
shareIt's just a movie. Why so serious?
shareWhat part of "I take my films seriously" etc do you not get? This is a money no object scenario so I said my piece.
shareMan, I pity the poor bastard who gets caught sneaking in a pack of Milk Duds lol
shareIf you can keep the great majority from acting like idiots, we can tolerate the few numb-skulls.
I already stated (perhaps elsewhere) that popcorn and snacks are forever woven into the movie experience -- for some. If I'm looking at the Mona Lisa, I don't want to be the guy standing there with a mouth full of Juju Bs and a triple Big Gulp sputtering, "What's the big deal? She ain't even that pretty." I would like to experience Art in an uncontaminated fashion. If you want to have sex with a woman who is chewing gum and not even pretending to get off, well, good for you. I'd rather LIVE in that experience.
And no one gets prosecuted for this transgression. Shamed, hopefully. No Concessions offered.
If you want to have sex with a woman who is chewing gum and not even pretending to get off, well, good for you.
Hey, I'm the one paying. She is the one needs to pleasure ME! Maybe bubblegum is her style of choice. Part of her individuality, y'know... Like how Miles Morales chose not to tie up one of his shoes. I won't impose my world view on other people. So if she's here to chew bubblegum and spread ass, and she's apparently not out of bubblegum, so be it.
shareBut you'd tolerate some numbskull who sputters "What's the big deal? She ain't even that pretty?" sans food?
But why can't I enjoy the finer points of cinema and still have my carton of popcorn?
The only time I'd consider it vulgar to allow junk food during the screening is if we were watching something like Shoah or an equally harrowing film.
Once again, this is just a made up scenario. I'd prefer not to feed into the notion people can't sit for a couple hours w/o feeding their faces, especially with garbage food. But if it helped my bottom line and people expected it, I'm sure I'd put in the snack / popcorn / soda counter.
shareOne screen would be dedicated to horror/thriller/drive-in theater type films from the 60s-80s
Another screen for foreign movies
Mainstream recent hits on two more screens and older, popular hits like E.T. or The Godfather, etc for cheaper prices
A bar, arcade, kitchen offering 'pub type' food and lots of props and posters on display
I would make sure each room was sound-proof.... I would show some of the great movies, especially ones that aren't as popular for whatever reason. I'd also reserve one for local film-makers who have no funds, and I'd play anything I thought was good. One screen is for the new movies, and I'd make sure I'd have plenty of foreign stuff, too, but I think a huge chunk would be documentaries, since they seem to have diminished less than feature films. I would have one screen reserved for nothing but classics, b&w, and then one screen for PG/Family stuff.
No phones. The stuff I liked would be 50 cents a ticket, to subsidize what I like... $5 for shit like Batman Part 32.
Ahh, man...
I'm looking forward to Batman Part 32.