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10 Reasons Why Spider-Man: Homecoming is Complete Garbage

posted 7 years ago by JediJones (235)
48 replies | jump to latest

Adapting a character faithfully is usually what makes superhero movies great, especially when that character is very well-known and very popular. That's the number one reason why Wonder Woman was a great movie. As seen in the trailers, Spider-Man: Homecoming has deviated so far from the essence of Spider-Man that the character has become totally unrecognizable and unappealing.

1. Spider-Man does not dream about becoming an Avenger. He did not choose to become a superhero for fame, fortune and glory. Quite the opposite. He learned not to seek those things out after those pursuits led to Uncle Ben's death. Spider-Man is only a superhero out of a sense of guilt, obligation and responsibility. What he does as Spider-Man gives him more angst than joy as Spider-Man 2 captured absolutely perfectly. He does not brag about his exploits. He is just happy to survive them.

2. Aunt May is not young-looking and hot. She is a doddering old Aunt. Raimi's movies cast her brilliantly. Webb's less so. Now this movie has hit rock bottom with its casting. Having Spidey's aunt be weak and dependent on him is important to enhancing his sense of burden and obligation in life. If she could easily walk out the door and land a rich husband, the whole balance of their relationship is thrown off.

3. Spider-Man builds his own gear, equipment and costumes. He does not depend on outside help to give him his abilities and powers. Writing him that way diminishes him greatly as a character. Having the MCU staff work on this movie is like having the Iron Man writer come in to guest-write the Spider-Man comic for a month and writing a story that makes Spider-Man look like a loser totally dependent on that "awesome" Iron Man character.

4. Ned Leeds is not a hideous-looking, overweight teen-ager in school with Peter. He works at the Daily Bugle and becomes the Hobgoblin.

[–] Underdog_73 (768) 7 years ago

You only came up with 10?????

[–] ZenGalacticore (1) 7 years ago

I absolutely, totally, completely agree! In addition to what you said, Spider Man never ASKED to join the Avengers! I grew up reading the comic books in the 1960's and '70's, and, if IIRC, it was the Avengers who ASKED Spider Man to join THEM!

He always said, "No thanks, fellas. I'm a LONER!" (And that was BECAUSE he was a kid, but behind the mask, he was Spider Man!) I can't believe how badly Disney would eff up Marvel's flagship superhero. Peter Parker's powers are organic, they're in his DNA; while Tony Stark's "powers" are nothing but tech. Spider Man--though he be just an 18 year-old kid and/or college student, could whoop Iron Man, no problem!

Like tech could beat Spider Man? Bullet, rocket, 'death ray', whatever, Spider Man's too quick to be hit by any of those weapons and others! Not only that, my friend, but in 'Homecoming', effing Tony Stark's supplied AI computer tells Spider Man that if he falls from the Washington Monument, he'll most likely die, as it's "550 feet to the ground" or whatever. Well BS! Spider Man could fall a thousand feet, onto concrete, and just be knocked unconscious for 10 or 20 minutes! (He'd still wake up with a sore head or whatever, but he's okay.)

Perhaps it's time for another movie, where the Avengers try to challenge Spider Man. And Spidey blows them away (um, without actually killing or seriously harming any of them), the fools! :)

[–] R_Kane (15828) 7 years ago

This was on HBO this weekend. Against my better judgement, I watched it. At least, I watched the first hour. Then I turned it off and deleted it from my DVR. I know that I'm not part of this thing's target demographic, but this is the first comic book film that I just turned off. Ever. Beyond bad.

[–] MaximRecoil (4599) 6 years ago

Spider Man--though he be just an 18 year-old kid and/or college student, could whoop Iron Man, no problem!

Like tech could beat Spider Man? Bullet, rocket, 'death ray', whatever, Spider Man's too quick to be hit by any of those weapons and others!

No, classic comic book Spider-Man could not even come close to defeating classic comic book Iron Man, though he could definitely beat classic comic book Captain America. Spider-Man is fast, but not insanely fast like DC's The Flash or Superman. He's certainly not fast enough to dodge energy weapons, nor even plain old bullets.

Classic Spider-Man was only in the 10-ton strength class, and Iron Man was in the 100-ton class (the top strength class, after which it is undefined). On the other hand, Captain America is only "peak human"; classic Marvel statistics said, "He can lift (press) a maximum of 800 pounds with supreme effort." That means Spider-Man is 25 times stronger than him, so Stark's claim in this movie that Captain America could lay Spider-Man out if he wanted to, was ridiculous relative to the classic comic books.

[–] TJLamb0518 (3316) 7 years ago

So....this whole thread is "WAAAAHHHH!!!! This is not like the comics I grew up reading!!!!".

Lighten up, Francis.

[–] Kurt (189) 7 years ago

JediJones, I agree. I read the Spidey comics when I was a kid, and I felt the first two Raimi movies were reasonably like the comics in feel, while this new one is nothing like the comics.

This movie was plain annoying throughout, imho. It just wasn't any good at all. Didn't feel at all like a Spider-Man movie, more like a random Avenger in spe. I just can't stand the Avengers any more, one movie was enough.

Ps. that quote posted by the TMC-4 poster is just an opinion, it does not justify how Spider-Man is in this movie. Spider-Man is one of the most well developed superhero characters, this movie does not show any of that. He must have very selective memory of the comics.

[–] [deleted] 7 years ago

Kinda glad I never read the comics now because I loved this movie. I get why changes from the comic bother people but with the 5 previous movies I'm guessing they felt they needed to do something different this time around. Overall it seems like it was well received but obviously some of the more hardcore Spider-man fans feel let down. The problem for them is that the studio likely feels that those people are going to go see any Spider-man movie regardless of how faithful it is so they're making movies trying to appeal to a general audience.

[–] Kurt (189) 7 years ago

Markdown474, I do actually not disagree about that, I do think they HAVE to change some aspects of Superhero comic books when they make movies. The stories are usually very short and, frankly, not very well suited for a general movie audience. That said, it was a mistake for me personally to see it. Spidey was always a character for kids or teens, but at least he did actually have some depth to him, unlike most other superheroes, and that is completely missing in this movie. It seems to me they focused on the teen aspect, in the sense they made it a movie which would appeal to teens specifically.

Unlike you, no matter whether they tried anything new or not, I just didn't like the movie and I think it's a bad movie, badly written and badly structured. In addition, I think Tom Holland is awful in the role. I'm never gonna watch any movie in which he has a major role, that's for sure (I've seen him in other movies before this, just as bad there). Sure, change can improve the movie and make it more interesting, but not any random kind of change for changes sake; It's like if you made superman an annoying whiner who sat in a bar throughout the movie complaining about lack of sensitivity in his dick.

[–] [deleted] 7 years ago

"It's like if you made superman an annoying whiner who sat in a bar throughout the movie complaining about lack of sensitivity in his dick."

Well he wasn't sitting in a bar but I really hated the mopey Superman of MoS and BvS lol. One thing I liked about Homecoming was that it was a young superhero facing relatively low stakes. The one thing I've become sick of in these movies is the world ending threat with some giant other-worldly creature. In this one Spider-man's final battle was simply stopping Vulture from hijacking the Avengers plane and it was less about saving the world and more about finding his own place in the world as a hero.

You and I disagree on whether this was badly written/structured but I totally get where you're coming from in not liking this one. For me this film worked and I liked it much better than either of the Andrew Garfield flicks and Spider-man 3 as well.

[–] Kurt (189) 7 years ago

Lol, I will forget Spider-Man III even exists. I'm not a true comic book fan at all, but I did think 1+2 was ok movies. But 3?, nope, it was plain bad, worse than this one imo.

Frankly, I liked the first Avengers movie, it didn't take itself too seriously. The second? Not so much. Same with Iron Man, first was good, with good performances, the others, not so much. It's simply the scripts, just uninspired stuff. I felt S:H was like a second movie in a series, Spider-Man's aspirations to become an Avenger, conflicting with school or whatever, basically very "whatever".

It ties strongly to the other recent MCU movies and what happened in them, so much so that it becomes annoying (to me) - and one of the reasons why I don't like the Avengers any more, it's all just so forced. With this movie there's the additional fact that I disliked the actor's performance, I felt he was extremely annoying. I didn't dislike him before this, as in the other roles I've seen him in he wasn't the focus. He just annoyed me throughout the Spiderman movie.

But I guess it depends on what you like, it's obviously not a fact, I just didn't like the movie.

[–] [deleted] 7 years ago

Yeah if you dislike Holland's performance, the movie really is a bust because he's on the screen for 90% of it. Hadn't thought of it but I think you're pretty accurate with S:H seeming like the second in a series of movies about him wanting to be an Avenger. Of course that arc seems to have wrapped up at the end of Homecoming and I'm looking forward to see what they do for the next one.

Spider-Man 3 has become kind of like Batman and Robin to me; I know it's not a good movie and was incredibly disappointed when I first saw it, but have learned to like it for just how stupid it really is.

Pretty much agree with you on your feelings toward the Iron Man movies. I didn't even see the second Avengers movie but I really liked Civil War and am looking forward to the one later this year. I'd say the comic book movie trend is becoming played out but based on Black Panther's box office that apparently isn't the case lol.

[–] TMC-4 (20123) 6 years ago

In theory, having Aunt May be "young and hot" makes more realistic sense. I never entirely understood why Aunt May and Uncle Ben had to be depicted as old enough to be Peter's grandparents, when he was still a teenager (I think that Peter was 15 when he got bit by the spider). I mean, how big of an age disparity was Uncle Ben from his younger brother, Richard (Peter's father). Did Peter's parents have him relatively late in their lives (i.e. when they were in their 40s)?

[–] TMC-4 (20123) 6 years ago

Spiderman Homecoming is basically Hey Arnold

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DC_AqezinXM

[–] [deleted] 6 years ago

I understand what you're trying to say. But don't you think it's pretty pointless to do a remake and have it exactly the same as the other versions. Not all changes are always bad.

I know you'll hate me for this, but Spider-Man: Homecoming is my favorite Spider-Man movie (I know, unpopular opinion.) It's the one I enjoyed the most. There were some things in the movie I didn't appreciate. Many of the things you said are correct, but most of those things didn't bother me and I liked a lot of the changes they made. Sometimes it's ok to like old and new, as long as it's good. But I guess that's kind of the problem here, you don't think it's good. (Trust me, there's plenty of new stuff I hate.) Like for example, when you said how there was too much comedy and how superhero movies shouldn't be comedic, that was kind of the main reason I loved this movie. I liked how it had the teen comedy feel to it because well, Peter Parker is a teenager, so it kind of makes sense and helps me relate to him more. Thor Ragnarok did it too, and it worked. So many superhero movies are so overly epic and take themselves so seriously, sometimes a little too seriously. Spider-Man is supposed to be more humorous and light hearted than other superhero movies.

I do agree with you on some things, like some semi-obvious PC messages, although obviously it didn't keep me from liking the movie. There are some changes they made I don't like, like his friend Ned I just find super annoying and wish someone else would have played him in a different way.

There may be more things they expand on in the second Spider-Man, so some things you said that weren't in the first movie could be in the second one. There are some flaws in this movie, and you have made some pretty good points