Disturbing - The Spectacular Now (2013) Discussion

[–] Imnotmark 11 years ago

Not disturbing but its sort of the point, its supposed to be that way.

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[–] NiKoDay 11 years ago

It's what makes it a realistic first boyfriend experience for a girl whose never had one. Also, she's sort of reliving her experience with her father, a man who died of addiction, trying to save him, I think.

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[–] dini0519 11 years ago

Yes, it was sad. She was desperate to keep him since she had lost her virginity to him. She was almost killed when he pushed her out of the car, but yet she still wanted the relationship so badly. I could relate though, unfortunately, and I'm sure many other women and girls can as well. Hopefully, most of us grow beyond that and learn to love ourselves and only then can we seek healthy relationships.
Dini

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[–] akswan88 11 years ago

Yes, Dini0519, I can also relate. Took me quite a while to grow past it as I married a man who was verbally and physically abusive to me mainly because I'd fooled around with him during our engagement (during which time he became abusive) and felt like my bed had been made and I needed to stick it out.

I was upset that they ended up together and then finding out that the book ended up with him staying broken up with her and staying an alcoholic made me wish I'd read the book and not seen the movie.

Actually, think I'll read the book now.
~~~~~~
Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once. ;)

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[–] dini0519 11 years ago

I may read the book as well. Thanks for such a thoughtful response.
Dini

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[–] hrstar24 11 years ago

How do you know they end up together in the movie? It is completely up for interpretation. When we see Aimee at school, she looks like she has completely changed (now wears make up/etc.), it looks like she has moved on, and the look on her face does NOT make it seem like she is happy to see Sutter.

Also... How do you know Aimee is a virgin?? I certainly don't remember hearing that in the movie, and even Roger Ebert says specifically in his review that neither Sutter or Aimee are virgins. Everything about the entire sex scene makes you think Aimee has at least some experience. You really missed the point of the movie if you think the only reason Aimee loved Sutter was because he took her virginity.

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[–] dini0519 11 years ago

We really DON'T know if they end up together. You are right. I assumed she was a virgin because she said she'd never really had a bf. She certainly seemed less experienced than Sutter. The point is, she was desperate for a relationship for at least part of the movie. It was a high point when she went on the bus without him, toward her dreams and her plans.

Dini

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[–] hrstar24 11 years ago

She wasn't some desperate vulnerable girl that Sutter just preyed on. There relationship started small and grew, it had its ups and its downs. The relationship wasn't all rainbows and unicorns, like all real life relationships are, but Sutter wasn't just using and abusing this poor helpless girl like you guys are making it out to be. They both learned a lot from each other.

You say a high point of the movie was when she went toward her dreams without him, you do remember that it was Sutter who convinced her in the first place she could go to college? She was just going to stay at home after high school and pick up after her crap mother until Sutter convinced her otherwise. Both Sutter and Aimee gained experience and became better people because of their relationship.

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[–] lanis_cupus 9 years ago

Sutter had no business pursuing Aimee and his friend even called him on it multiple times. He had too much social advantage over her making it like an 18 year old dating a 12 year old. Also, he knew Aimee would validate anything he did so he used her to feel better about his life. Just awful.

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[–] Films411 11 years ago

What part of the sex scene leads you to believe that Aimee is not a virgin ? In the book Aimee tells Stutter that she's been with another guy before him. Is that in the movie ?

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[–] op-prdigy 11 years ago

I thought she was a virgin as well, considering she said she never had a boyfriend before when they were walking through the trees at that party. And while, obviously, people don't exactly have to be dating to have sex, she didn't seem like the type of girl to just have a fling either.

Mind you, I have only watched the film.

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[–] audiopinions 11 years ago

Also, the "go slow" line made me think she was a virgin.

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[–] lanis_cupus 9 years ago

Yes, that seemed pretty obvious.

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[–] DeniP 9 years ago

Really? Obvious?

Well, I thought it's obvious that from her numerous previous sexual escapades, she had come to the conclusion that she preferred slow sex.
How about that?
She only had one boyfriend before. So just imagine how much sex she got, being always single and cute. She just knows her preferences well by now.

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[–] lanis_cupus 8 years ago

Except there's this thing called *plausibility* based on story context that you seem to ignore. Is that intentional?

We needn't hear more than 3 lines from the character to know she's a 12 year old trapped in a 20 year old's body, which is the most offensive element of the film.

Is this to be an empathy test?

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[–] hillww 11 years ago

The DVD has a deleted scene where Aimee explains she is not a virgin but that the bloke had his way and fled and that Sutter is therefore a great improvement...

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[–] moviefan098 11 years ago

the book is probably more realistic but i needed this movie ending. it would've been too bitter for me and it would've tarnished the great feelings i had watching this or in the case of the book, reading it up until that point. also, don't compare your abusive husband to this guy. all he did the whole relationship was boost her self esteem. he just freaked out at the end when he met his dad. realistically, since he's an alcoholic, we can say that he'll become an abuser later but this is a movie and we can only discuss what has already happened.

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[–] moviefan098 11 years ago

it was a healthy relationship, up until that point and it was understandable because one of his life long ideas have just been crushed by seeing his father for what he really is. he was extremely supportive of her for their entire relationship. everything he said and did it was to boost up her self esteem and help her free herself from those who kept her down. the only bad thing he did was freak the *beep* out and told her to get out of his car. he didn't cause that accident. the women here are making him out to be some kind of abuser when he is actually a really good boyfriend. the only thing disturbing about him was his alcoholism and he was only 18. he's all good intentions now but he won't be for long if he doesn't stop drinking. ultimately, in the end it is hinted that he would stop drinking. all we can hope for is to be better in the future. no one knows what he'll do tomorrow.

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[–] colorado_moviebuff2012 11 years ago

..this movie wasn't good at all.. and yes very disturbing it also sends a horrible message.

- a drunk alcoholic goes after a young teen girl and she has no self esteem or self respect so she gives him a chance and thinks she knows what love is. He than yells at her, gets her to swear, and gets her to drink and sleep with him, than pushes her away, and causes her to be hit by a car, ...pathetic! .

...Mean while we all know he still has feelings for his ex too. He was a joke and so selfish.

...this is one of the worst movies of the year.

...

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[–] PacificHeights 11 years ago

a drunk alcoholic goes after a young teen girl and she has no self esteem or self respect so she gives him a chance and thinks she knows what love is. He than yells at her, gets her to swear, and gets her to drink and sleep with him, than pushes him away, and causes her to be hit by a car, ...pathetic! .

Aimee was an intelligent teenager. He gets her to swear? She wasn't mentally challenged and they were the same age. Aimee had control of what she did and didn't do. She choose to swear. She choose to drink. She wanted to sleep with Sutter, and so she did. Sutter didn't cause her to be hit by a car. It was an accident.

Sutter and Aimee both benefited, learned, and grew because they were a couple. Aimee never would have gone to college if it hadn't been for Sutter. He gave her the courage and the self-esteem to go.

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[–] theoretically 11 years ago

You completely misunderstood the entire movie.

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[–] PacificHeights 11 years ago

There was nothing disburbing about Sutter and Aimee as a couple. They learned from each other. Sutter and Aimee grew as individuals because they were in a committed relationship. Aimee drank more than she would have if she had not been with Sutter. She was trying new things, testing her own limits, doing things that healthy teenagers do to broaded their life experiences.

Sutter didn't make Aimee do anything. Aimee did what she wanted to do because it made her feel alive, made her feel a part of Sutter, and she was in love with him.

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[–] ambeezy21 11 years ago

I do. I was expecting her to be a good influence on him NOT him being a bad influence on her. Sutter had a lot of stuff he needed to work on and Aimee loved him so much and kind of took on his bad habits herself. Definitely not healthy but it's pretty realistic, especially with teenagers.

honey badger don't care.

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[–] paulfitzpa 11 years ago

I agree the relationship was broken. It reminded me of battered person syndrome.

We don't know all of the details of her background either. Was the mother an abuser? We know the father died, but the rest of her character is not fleshed out.

Was she seeking a dominant person to attach herself to? The relationship was disturbing for certain.

That ending in the book in definitely too bleak for a movie designed to be "light entertainment".

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[–] Oleander2010 11 years ago

I think it was realistic. So many relationships operate that way. Aimee was the nice girl next door. She had little to no experience with dating, and probably had some insecurities of her own. During their first party, she told him that "guys don't look at me that way," and she didn't believe she was attractive. So, at times she adjusted herself to fit his personality, and she gave more of herself in the relationship to maintain their dynamic.

Honestly, I probably would have advised her to rethink the relationship, but fortunately, in this situation, it worked out okay. Many times it doesn't and someone ends up hurt...for good. Thankfully, he wasn't really a bad guy (just lost), and hopefully in real life a guy like Sutter would go to great lengths to rebuild the trust and make amends for the ringer he put her through.

So was it twisted? A bit. But I can't help but focus in on the end result, and I think they both eventually got what they wanted. I mean, who hasn't put their parents through copious amounts of stress during their adolescence? The hope is that children grow up, realize their wrongs, and make peace with the very parents who put up with all of their crap. Is it right? No. But it happens.

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[–] brahma-3 11 years ago

Life is disturbing, which makes ppl. run away or into addictions, and very few movies catch the realization of what we can do and who we can do it with without pathos, clichés or lies. This one delivers the most authentic script of any Hollywood movie I've seen in long time, and there's no lack of confidence in the direction and performances either. Bravo!

If you dag the movie and can imagine the characters a bit older in a different setting, watch Susanne Bier's superb After the Wedding, the 20-years-later version of what-if-it-didn't-work-out-between-them.

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[–] rexpress99 11 years ago

You are right bout one thing for sure. The girl played an excellent character. Him too for the immature little boy that he portrayed. There are a lot of opinions on this message board so I'm not going to try and piss a lot of people off by saying they didn't get it or for taking someone's side. I was a lot like that kid in the fact that it took me 40 years to grow up and it was a heroin addiction that helped to stunt my growth into a responsible adult. I became worldly. A lot of addicts do. I had a few women that took care of me or I should say tried to take care of me, because all we do as addicts are drag people down with us or we try to destroy everything good around us. That kid in this movie was worldly in a way. he helped Amy grow sexually and she learned some things from him, but I dare say that I hope he was serious about doing the right thing if those were his intentions when he caught up to her. I really liked that girl and if that guy was one of my friends I would've been so mad at him for hurting her again and again. Girls like her will forgive over and over and it sucks watching someone tear them down even as some poster put earlier that they let it happen. Love is a hard emotion to resist. Ask someone who has had a few bad breakups. They seem to hurt forever. We didn't get to see where that movie went, but dollars to donuts that girl takes him back and he crashes and burns a few more times before he gets his life in order and just by her loving him she gets hurt in the process. Look at the boys mother. She still looks hurt even after being away from his father all these years. It was a decent movie and that part where he yelled at her to get out of the car and she got whacked, I thought I was going to die when that happened. Talk about bad things. That just about blew me away how quick and awful that was.

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