Thank you for starting this interesting discussion. It has attracted a lot of heated off-topic posts.
To bring it back on topic... no, I don't think "Helen made Hoover go gay". Helen had a high work ethic and so did J Edgar. I think he respected her for that.
He had even more respect for his mother though. In a featurette about the film, Judi Dench described her character as being a bit like Lady Macbeth in having high aspirations for J Edgar who, in this case, was her son and not her husband as in the case of Macbeth.
Anyhow, it was through his mother's subliminal manipulation and his deep respect for her that made J Edgar the task-orientated workaholic that he was. That meant that he had little opportunity to hone his social skills. He did his bit of dating and romancing. He seemed to be merely asking Clyde as a buddy what he thought about marrying which seemed mainly for his image. J Edgar seemed to admire Clyde's suave style and relaxed air. He certainly felt comfortable in his company.
Clyde, however, was gay and had great affection for J Edgar. This might have been in a platonic way like Helen. Jealousy, however, overtook Clyde when J Edgar was considering marriage. As I said before, J Edgar's image was a significant factor. The feeling of missing Clyde seemed to make J Edgar wonder about his sexuality. J Edgar even went as far as touching on this topic with his mother. She, in no uncertain terms, let him know which side of the fence she stood. He, as usual, acquiesced.
J Edgar's mother seemed mildly concerned when she heard that he was going out for dinner. I suppose she felt it was a good thing for him even though it would mean him moving away from her. She probably felt that she would be still be able to keep J Edgar in line. It seems he would continue to respect her.
This is all getting a little speculative because, as presented in this excellent film, he never did marry. For the record, I'm rating this film 10/10 (perfect). Superb acting, story, cinematography and directing.
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