MovieChat Forums > Jeff, Who Lives at Home (2012) Discussion > This movie changed my stance on homosexu...

This movie changed my stance on homosexuality.

posted 13 years ago by dontbelievethehype-2
21 replies | jump to latest

Hi, I'm 28 years and grew up in a time/place were gay children were openly harassed. To give an example I remember one field trip in the sixth grade were the entire bus chanted "Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah,nah,nah,nah, hey, hey, Giuseppes gay"

I'm ashamed to say that I participated in the chant and took part in many other cruel encounters with gay classmates.

When I was 16 my father died of cancer it had a large effect on me, one of which being that it led me to be a kinder an gentler person. Not long after my father's passing I openly apologized to Giuseppe, he didn't except and I can't say that I blame him.

Even though I had apologized for my cruelty and as I person I had changed drastically I wouldn't say that I was ever a supporter of gay rights. I believed that people had the right to be gay, but that people also had the right to openly openly opposed to homosexuality. I lost a friend a few years ago defending Miss California's right to be anti-gay. I was an idiot.

The scene in this movie where Rae Dong explains that at this point in her life it doesn't matter if it's a man or a woman, she just wanted someone who got her. I couldn't help but agree entirely, and I couldn't help but look back at the bravery of the young people I grew up with who realized that years ago.

[–] 13 years ago

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[–] novimovieman 13 years ago

First of all it is 'accept' not 'except' (then again he did 'except' your apology.) And it is 'Rae Dawn' not Dong which sounds like a sex tool.
Rae Dawn Chong's position may seem well intentioned but at the end of the day we all need close physical sexual contact and that pretty much contradicts her stance and defines homosexuality which is sex with a person of the same gender. Did the kiss really satisfy Sarandon? If so what next. If not then what? Are they going to sit around naked and making out and masturbating? We also need a clarification of what Rae means by 'got her.' I get it when my friend says he really needs a blo_job, but don't look in my direction for one. I believe she was probably gay. If it walks like a duck, ... Well you get the picture. This scene is now a mandate of the ultra-liberal set that wants everyone to believe that they are at least partly homosexual.

As an apologist turned authority I don't defend my comments because I am always right.

[–] pezzltj 13 years ago

unless you are an older person who may have lost the love of your life I don't think you can make any prediction or your opinion matters in this case. I thought it was kind of funny because to me what they set up was Sarandon and her coworker being Thelma and Louise, who weren't lesbians but were partners in crime who kind of completed one another.

The point was that, they might not be sexually attracted to one another, but they get along and like each other as humans on earth, and sometimes the companionship and the compassion of another person is enough to satisfy you. Much easier to set this up and end the movie than actually play it out and see what happens, because I think the only way it goes is they eventually become lesbians, having sex with each other, or it doesnt work out. Sarandon never falls for her coworker but the coworker is in love with her. The coworker would get her heart broken for sure.

[–] Bagelchic 13 years ago

Wow, sorry you did not get the 'Love' back in response to your comment. I think it is really fabulous what you've written!

[–] b530 13 years ago

I thought that part of the whole movie was pointless, and didn't do much to help with all the other stuff that was going on in the film. Plus, I don't see how coming out of the closet is considered bravery. It's perverted.

[–] badscene 13 years ago

You are a bigoted ass munch, dude. I hope one day you meet the wrong gay guy and he kicks your sorry ass to a bloody pulp.

[–] sydnee_man 13 years ago

I really think this movie is about loss, pain, loneliness and how people cope with it. And basically there is no right or wrong way, just as long as you keep moving forward.

Follow me on twitter @sydsmoviepicks

[–] SilentBrett 12 years ago

Well written, Sydnee. It's too bad that a post like this will be lost in between threads about pot, who knows more about mental disorders, and how "generation Y" kids were coddled too much.

[–] sydnee_man 12 years ago

Well thanks! And I also agree that too many parents coddle their kids. I see my nephew struggling with that now :-(

Follow me on twitter @sydsmoviepicks

[–] 12 years ago

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[–] TheFilmGuy1 13 years ago

This was very interesting to read. That's really cool man. :)

[–] Trackmaster 12 years ago

Support gay rights all you want, but do not change your mind because of this movie. There are so many other movies that done a much better job with it.

[–] grinch031 12 years ago

As someone who has had several gay friends over the years and supports gay rights, I think this sub-plot was liberal propoganda. Look the co-worker sends anonymous secret admirer emails and romantically kisses Sharon. If that is not a romantic crush, I don't know what is. She is certainly not heterosexual even though if she sort of said that she was when they were talking about it on the phone.

I know that there is no way I would ever develop some kind of pseudo-romantic relationship with a man just because he "gets me". I have male friends who get me, and because I find the idea of kissing them or touching their hairy legs repulsive, I'm content sticking with females for that. I have never been in control of who I am attracted to, and that is one reason I support gays, because I know they don't have control over it either. Over the last 3 decades from when I was 5 years old til now, I have only ever been attracted to females and never felt confused because I had some special bond with another guy. For me it really is binary.

So yeah its propoganda and I think some gays probably fantasize about converting a straight person over, but for most its just not going to happen.

[–] fe_faqet 12 years ago

"For me it really is binary."

Exactly, for you.

I remember back in high school i had a really good friend named Mark. To relate it to the movie you could say he really "got me" and i really got him. I considered (and still do) myself as a heterosexual, but he had such a huge impact on my life that when i look back at it i can't help but compare it to having a crush on someone. Though it's not like i was walking on air, in fact a lot of the time he actually annoyed me. I might have to add that the "attraction" was never physical. A few years later it came up when i was talking to my psychiatrist, and she explained to me that i might in fact have been in a little in love with him, but that it probably had more to do with where I was in my life than with any kind of romantic attraction. We're very good friends today, and i have (thankfully) discarded all those complicated feelings i had back then, of course i haven't told him about it 'cause he doesn't need to know.

My point is that even though you think of yourself as heterosexual it is possible that you can create bond with another person that is even stronger than one you would have with a person you're physically intimate with. Think of people in the army, or twins, or generally just people who have been through a lot together.

The physical part is another thing, some have an easy time getting physical with a person of the same sex, while most people find it a bit repulsing. I have met gay guys who used to think of same-gender sex as a disgusting thing, though they learned to enjoy it when they did it with the right people. Another argument is relationships between prisoners and the ones between the ancient greeks. There was a lot of gay sex in Greece, but was that because they had a higher percentage of homosexuals? Unlikely. In prisons in-mates learn to satisfy each other because there simply are no females around. These are of course extremeties, but i believe they are still worthy of mentioning.

Experimentation between women is a lot more prevalent than between men, i guess they just aren't as grossed out by the thought as much as men, but what do i know, i just looked at some numbers.

What i am trying to say is that although the 'hetero', 'bi' and 'homo'- boxes are pratical, and in most cases fitting, they don't really give you the whole picture.

[–] bluethreads 12 years ago

what a beautiful post.

I'm so glad that movies can inspire an increased tolerance and understanding of other people's views/ways of life.

Almost all of our biases, etc. are a lack of education and/or understanding.

[–] kaiser100 12 years ago

Brutal and nasty responses to this post. I guess some people have growing up to do.