I was wondering, as a woman, do men think that way about women? Do they only care about looks when they meet you? Ex: Do they look at your boobs & butt? When they ask how you are, do they really not care? I'm just wondering, should I be aware of these things that Mike was saying? I wonder if that would really work what Abby did to Colin, like make him wait on the phone etc etc...? Please men explain? Thanks!
shareWe do think like that, but only to a point. They exaggerated a lot of things for comedic purposes.
shareI feel like he hit it on the head. Mike was right about guys looking for beauty first as supposed to personality. It's very true. I'm not saying you have to be a size 2 and 98 pounds because curves are gorgeous. Just not obese curves.
sharepvchick32001-
There will never be a specific playbook for picking up every guy. Guys are just as varied in their tastes as women. The best way to get the guy that you lust after is to put him in your crosshairs. Watch him. But be discreet. You don't want him to think of you as 1. A stalker or 2. Too available. Take a look at the women he has dated in the past. Are they tall? Are they short? Are they emaciated? Are they voluptuous? Do they have big eyes? As best as you can, mimic this look. Next up: look at the girls' personalities. Are they demure? Are they sleazy? Are they highly intelligent? Are they complete idiots? If their behavior is far blown from yours, you might as well pack it up and go home. You're not going to be happy with this guy. No woman likes to pretend that she is something that she is not. But if their personality type is close to yours, and you can mimic their look, you might cautiously proceed. Next up: find out if his interests are close to yours. Does he like quiet nights in while you like to party it up? Is your favorite artist Verrochio, while he leans more the the artistic stylings of Jim Lee? Is your idea of literature the latest issue of Cosmo, while he prefers Elmore Leonard? Before you decide to go any further, check out the things that he likes to do. See if your tastes gibe. If they don't, cut and RUN. No girl can be happy pretending to be someone that she's not. If you think that you can acquire an actual enjoyment for the things the man loves, go for it. If the most you can muster is a strong respect for the things he admires, walk away. After a while, you will get annoyed at the fact that you are focusing on his enjoyments to the exclusion of yours. If you can enjoy his interests, start engaging in them right away. Also, make friends with his friends. If his friends hate you, the relationship doesn't stand much of a chance of working.
@valleester,
The love of my life reads Cosmo before bed, while I read spy novels, so what? We make each other laugh after years together, the sex is still hot, ie we adore each other physically & intellectually. We laugh a LOT. We share common core values and similar senses of humor, and imo in life/love, thats much more important than whether our favorite cocktails, artists or authors are same/similar. Chemistry starts the process, and after that, it's consistent work/compromise & a good dose of plain old luck to really find/keep someone you both love being with. And I agree the previous poster who said: don't use rom-com flicks to base or gauge your real life on.
Ugh, brettrq-1, just ugh. For some, favorite cocktails, artists, or authors *are* core values. For some, favorite cocktails, artists, or authors create a base for chemistry. My husband cracks a joke about everything, and I'm about as serious as they come. My husband is really inexperienced. The sex was never hot. Granted, a similar moral base can be important, but, really, how often does that come up? Most recently, my husband and I have discussed whether or not Aerosmith should hang it up, whether or not we think that James Cameron's script-writing or directing has any short-comings, our tastes in furniture (which was actually more of an argument than a discussion,) how I should handle the accidental immersion of an electronic device in water (which was kind of an unverbalized argument,) his two most recent shopping buys, make-up application (which led to a mild argument,) and whether or not a friend of his is in a good place to be in a relationship. And we discussed each of these things while sipping our favorite beverages, while perusing items from our favorite authors. Morality, or lack thereof, is really not high on our agenda of discussion material. More than that, morality is not a common topic of discussion among my male friends, either. We don't buy a few pizzas, some hotwings, and some beers and discuss morality between playing video games and watching supercross, nascar, football, and baseball. We buy a few pizzas, some hotwings, some beers, and we give Robby crap for loving fenders when pre-'89 PRS clearly put out a better guitar, we give Joe crap for buying a $30,000 truck he never drives because it eats too much gas, we reminisce about the 80's and how pizza parlors put out bigger pizzas with bigger toppings and better tasting pizza sauce back then as opposed to now, we give Blaine crap for showing up late, we give Gary kudos for having the best job in the group, but then wonder at his logic for favoring a Spector above a Tobias, we comment on whatever is going on the TV screen, we give Mark crap for spending 99.8% of his time on the phone or on the 'net, I get crap for refusing to go back to work until I finish my degree, we finish playing video games, we finish watching TV, we finish off the food and the beers, we go our separate ways, and then we do it all again next week. Work and compromise are great to maintain a relationship, but shared interests (or lack thereof,) can be a pretty good indicator of whether or not a relationship is going to be a disaster before a person ever has to experience said disaster. But I'll agree with you that no one should base or gauge his or her life on a movie.
share@valleester: I have to say: I am completely with brett! You don't need to find common interests. There will always be enough of them, but mostly you just need to respect the partner's interests.
Far more important is the chemistry, making each other laugh and, yes, very important, good sex! The sexual aspect is an integral part of a good relationship, so if sex with your husband is not hot, work on it! Try something, because if the sex isn't good that means there is no passion! And love is passion, lots of it. And when you have passion and love you try work on a relationship and find common ground and common interests. Not the other way round. Passion very seldomly evolves out of shared tastes!
I do, of course, hope that you are the exception to the rule and wish you all the best in your marriage!
So... oysters and beer? Until we puke! (The Good Guys)
"The problem is skinny young and dumb will get plenty of SEXUAL attention from men. Maybe even brief relationships, but ultimately if they have no substance then they're never going to find a lasting relationship. Then you know what they are ... 40 year old + women spending a lot of money trying to prevent the inevitable ... aging. They become even sadder than ever. They then find themselves no longer a object of lust, but an object of humour. Worse yet, they have to settle for some *beep* because they don't have any REAL qualities to attract a good guy."
Wow... I think this statement is well written and insightful. I never thought about the women that get plenty of sexual attention and what they can be like (possibly) in t the future.
Sorry, but that's just an excuse that not so pretty women use: oh, she's pretty, therefore also dumb!" They may keep telling themselves that, or open their eyes to the truth: beautiful people have an advantage in life and jealously calling them dumb doesn't help any, but only downplays their own value as apparently they have not only lost to someone prettier, but also dumb.
So... oysters and beer? Until we puke! (The Good Guys)
@pvchick32001.
The problem with your original question is that it is asking for a generalisation. A mans need and/or requirement from a woman will vary greatly depending on many many factors. It could be as simple as
a. Pure physical attraction - that can be vastly diffirent from male to male.
b. He has seen a woman that looks like his best mates girlfriend whom he adores.
c. The actions of the lady could spark some sort of reaction.
Those 3 are just examples the list goes on and on. A male can and will be attracted to a woman HE sees as attractive, fat, skinny, big breasted, tight butt etc etc. On the other scale men go out to hunt women just for sex and don't give too much thought to anything else. Other men genuinely respect women and will be hesitant to even approach one that he is attracted to, no matter what.
One could go on and on with this subject. If you asked the question "What do you find attractive in a woman" - then the diversity of answers would be the same as your original question.
Simple answer... yes.
share"c. The actions of the lady could spark some sort of reaction."
Reminds me of when I went to a grocery store. The clerk wasn't ugly, but I didn't find myself particularly attracted to her. Then a mildly awkward moment occured, which caused her to laugh (I was gonna pay for items on both sides of a seperator, and I didn't notify her of this, so she awkwardly laughed as she realized it). And just like that, I thought she was really, really cute, and I couldn't quite get my mind off her the rest of that day.
I really do think the way a woman acts add A LOT to the attraction. A few months earlier I saw this other clerk who, granted, was extremely gorgeous to begin with (I would go as far as calling her one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen - it pains me that I have never gotten to see her since), but the way she acted made her that much more compelling. She sat there looking really happy, and she talked and laughed with this elderly customer in front of me. She seemed like a really sweet girl all around. Had she just sat there looking pissed off, I doubt I would be very attracted to her, and I would probably have forgotten about her. I can't stand grumpy people, good looking or not (I know this for a fact, as I've seen a lot of beautiful women that I'm not attracted to, just because of how they act). This might have been a really bad example though, because as I admit, she was frustratingly beautiful. Whatever.
To add another story to this, take this one girl I was in love with for around 5 years. I liked everything about her when I knew her - she had a great personality, she was easily humored, and she was gorgeous. But seeing pictures of her on Facebook now, I can't say I find this girl particularly beautiful. As it would seem, but I'm not entirely sure if this is true, the way she ACTED painted a completely different picture of her. I'm led to believe that her personality made her attractive to me in all aspects. But on the other hand, she could just have been one of those who look a lot better in motion.
In another case, we have this girl I never cared for, looks-wise. And then I heard her sing with a beautiful voice, and I saw her in a different light afterwards.
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Morning sun, vanquish me!
I didn't like when he tried to change her appearance. Why should women feel pressured to wear thigh high dresses and show their tits all the time? There was absolutely nothing wrong with the way Abby dressed going to work. And the hair extensions? Ugh, give me a break.
shareWhen we first meet a girl, yeah we're checking out looks. We're gonna be most interested in the women that we are most attracted to, but that makes sense. Life is too short to be with someone you're not attracted to. Sex ain't everything of course....but if the physical attraction and the good sex ain't there, it can be a huge problem.
Now when we're falling in love, there are alot more things than looks. As far as what, that depends on the guy. But a guy ain't gonna fall in love with you just because you have a great rack or a nice ass lol!! If that's all he likes, that's just lust. But when it's love, yeah there's alot more to it than looks. But of course, everyone has different taste and things they like about a woman's body, so there is no one "blueprint" to go by. For example, in the movie, he tells her to get rid of the ponytail....I personally disagree with that, I find ponytails to be very sexy and attractive on most women. There's also always been something about a girl in glasses for me...don't know why, but glasses always get my attention. Oh and eyes....yeah, it's definitely not all about the body. And as far as personality traits, say a girl doesn't completely wow me with her looks....if she can make me laugh lot, I mean really laughing and not just laughing to be nice, that'll make her much more attractive to me.
Looks may get the attention first....but we are looking for more than that in a woman, just like yall are looking for more than one thing in a guy. Looks are just icebreakers lol!!
**Greg Maddux is the greatest pitcher of this generation.**
Some guys do, but this movie wasn't written by a guy, it was written by women that think that's how all men think. The guys in this movie came across as effiminate to me, even Butler, despite his supposed macho personality, which was the female perspective seeping through.
I don't think any of the characters were very realistic, i especially didn't like the main, Heigl's, character. I know it's meant to be a comedy, not a defining statement on the nature of mankind, but it wasn't in the slightest bit funny either, mainly due to the annoying characters. I felt like they tried to get male viewers by casting Butler and having him by rough and ready, but that only works for those guys that, like Butler's character, find a film funny because of people saying things such as "sticks his finger up a guy's ass!". The dialogue made the main characters appear to have somewhat low I.Q's.
I can only speak about the first 40 mins though, as i turned it off at that point and re-watched Lemony Snicket's Series of Unfortunate Events, prefering to spend my time with Count Olaf than the one dimensional, pisspoor excuse for human beings that the screenwriters of The Ugly Truth ejaculated into my face, lol.
i think the best advice was dont try to learn about life from rom-coms.Unfortunately,many women take such movies or series like Sex and the city too seriously and copy behaviours with disastrous results for themselves and
even to the point of affecting social behaviour.
[deleted]
You are so gay Danny. Protest much? Keep dreaming of naked Christian Bale and trannies who look like Jennifer Tilly
http://lorddixiesblog.blogspot.com/
As a man, honestly, I have to be physically attracted to someone to be interested at first. I like a variety of women in a variety of ways when it comes to looks. However, looks fade at some point, and if I want to stick around it's because I actually like to be around her and that's a little more complicated.
shareNeonNoodle - that just about sums it up...
share