MovieChat Forums > (500) Days of Summer (2009) Discussion > Are you Team Tom or Team Summer?

Are you Team Tom or Team Summer?

posted 10 years ago by rebellion32
45 replies | jump to latest

I'm team neither. They'd both make terrible partners. Tom is insecure, needy and naive. Summer told him from the beginning that she wasn't looking for anything serious, yet he still let himself get his hopes up and then blamed her when she ultimately rejected him.

Summer is no better. She knew Tom had a thing for her, yet she still kept sleeping with him, flirting and sending him mixed messages. No wonder he was so confused.

With that said, I would say Tom is the lesser of two evils. Tom would probably learn from this and not make the same mistake again. Summer would probably continue to manipulate people because she doesn't seem to care about how her actions affect others.

[–] Lincbond442 10 years ago

I'm team Rachel. She was the only one who had her head screwed on right.

"Don't tell me your little problems son, all I'm interested in is results."

[–] washcloud 9 years ago

...I don't know if this counts, but Tom had HIS head screwed,,,,right on.

Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the past

[–] Fruitbatt 10 years ago

I think a lot of people would be team Tom but mostly because the story was told from his perspective. People tend to emphasize with the main character.

[–] Fruitbatt 10 years ago

I mean Empathize not emphasiZe * lol

[–] sharpnova 10 years ago

you already said emphasize, *beep*

[–] Fruitbatt 10 years ago

You're mentally retarded

[–] washcloud 9 years ago

...in other words, what you're basically saying her is that "siZe" does not matter. Right?

Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the past

[–] blindvias-071407 10 years ago

Keeping score in these things as if they were having a boxing match might be missing the point of the movie.

These are human people doing the best that they can. Tom's heart was broken and we see how he let this happen. But in the end we are happy to see his spirit lives on, and he tries for the next girl. Hopefully Tom eventually learns his lesson and finds the right one.

For us, perhaps one lesson is we don't need to keep score, and even when things don't work out, we can still treat each other well.

[–] Minus_The_Beer 10 years ago

Team neither. The movie did a great job of showing that sometimes two people can be perfectly decent (and flawed) but otherwise absolutely wrong for each other. There was no bad guy/good girl (or vice versa).

Anyone here mentions Hotel California dies before the first line clears his lips.

[–] vyperman7 10 years ago

I think what Summer really meant is that she didn't want a relationship with that VERSION of Tom. Who she wanted, was the Autumn version - cool, confident, romantically assertive, and passionate about life. But Tom couldn't be his best self until he put Summer behind him.

She stuck around for so long because she saw that potential. But it just never came out. I mean she put herself in his orbit so many times so he'd ask her out. Never did. Then after karaoke night, she tried to get Tom to admit what he wanted and take charge. He never did, and she had to act like the man and make the first move. As a whole, she acted like the man leading the dynamic and that's why she saw him as Nancy. She also tried multiple times to encourage him to get back into architecture. But he never did. Instead he wanted to settle for a job he hated, and was content to obsess over Summer. So she felt smothered and unsafe with him in the long run.

[–] el-mo897 9 years ago

Agreed ?

[–] KevsHardLemonade 8 years ago

That was brilliantly put. I only saw that from this perspective after seeing it again at a different point in my life. When I first watched it, I saw Summer as a manipulative sociopath and Tom was a nice guy who got the shaft but recently, I see it as Tom was weak and couldnt handle his emotions while she was the stronger of the two.

[–] nishivijay 10 years ago

I would like to be on both their teams in a way because i can empathise with both of them.

Tom is depressed about his job and is in a funk and I know how it is like to be in a funk. I could be a great entertaining person; it just might not show when I'm not at peace with myself.

I can relate to summer too because I know how it is to make a joke or be the life the party, and then i stop being a real person... Like someone wants me to make a joke or 'remember the time you said this' but then it's shutting out my voice and my real concerns and the real person too, like i'm not being heard because the personality is drowning out the person.

and at the movie when summer did the meanest thing she did it for revenge and recovery, and as bad as it was, how much credit is she going to get for the good intentions and how much blame is she going to get for the bad intentions? If that was the only thing about her, she would be really mean but she made a really cruel mistake after showing concern for a long time (she stayed with him hoping for more and honoring his needs, she didn't date his best friend when she knew tom was interested) but it's going to ruin her reputation (and she accepts that because that's how he's going to recover) so there's also a self sacrificing element in a way... I couldn't do what she did but i know how it is to be in a position of mixed intentions knowing full well you're just going to take the blame...

the thing about tom is that he is so much more than we will ever see.... if all he was was the guy in the movie he would be neutral that leads towards evil... he doesn't care until everything goes bad... but the way i see it almost everyone could get that way for a period and once he gets his career going he'll be so much more... Summer we see the good (maybe not all the good) and there are things that mitigate the bad... him he's just a much better guy than we'll ever see in these 500 days... No matter how good that is he could be so much more...

[–] joaovictorlr 10 years ago

I'm Team Love

[–] homercles11 10 years ago

I'm Team Set Summer on Fire, set a pack of rabid dogs at her and throw her off a building into traffic.

[–] SUNNYandSTORMY 9 years ago

THUMBS UP

[–] TrapLordRonSwanson 10 years ago

I emphasized with Tom when I first saw this and I was younger and more naive. I saw this again recently, 6 years later, and now I side with Summer. It's not like she tricked him or anything, she always made it clear from the start what kind of relationship she wanted. It was still heartbreaking, yes, and I see why Tom thought he could "change" her, but ultimately it was his own fault.

[–] patrickbohn 10 years ago

she always made it clear from the start what kind of relationship she wanted.

Well, she always said what kind of relationship she wanted. The question is, did her actions send Tom another message? Don't get me wrong, if you want to be friends, that's your right. But it's strange to continue to take a "We're just friends" stance after you've been spending the night in each other's beds, not to mention watching porn and attempting to recreate the moves together in the shower. Relationships progress, and obviously Tom's and Summer's did. Refusing to address that fact doesn't make it not true, it simply creates confusion.

That said, Tom had major issues of his own. If you explicitly tell someone "I need X from you" and the first words they say in response are "I can't give you that" then she's not the one for you, and you should realize that. Summer's not a mind reader. If Tom's having a problem with the relationship, but decides he'd rather keep it to himself or vaguely allude to it than address it directly, that's his issue.

[–] TrapLordRonSwanson 10 years ago

The question is, did her actions send Tom another message?

Yeah, because that's what exactly what friends with benefits are. Summer seems to think more like a dude in this case, she just wanted someone to hook up with and not have the emotional baggage that comes with it- Tom should've seen it coming far away, I agree with you on that.

I agree that it does seem harsh, but Summer wasn't really in the wrong here. Even watching the story from Tom's point of view, I could tell that it was all his fault- his fault that he thought he could "change" her, his fault for falling so hard. It may hurt but that's the truth.

[–] patrickbohn 10 years ago

because that's what exactly what friends with benefits are.

Right, but she didn't say she wanted to be FWB

[–] TrapLordRonSwanson 10 years ago

If someone said what she said to me I would assume they would have wanted to be friends with benefits. It's pretty obvious.

[–] patrickbohn 10 years ago

If someone said what she said to me I would assume they would have wanted to be friends with benefits. It's pretty obvious.

But that's the problem. Both Tom and Summer sit there assuming that it's obvious what the situation is, and they don't realize the other person has a completely different view of what's going on.

It's why Summer tries to tell him they're just friends, and Tom cuts her off and says "This is not how you treat your friend." It's why she says she doesn't want a relationship and he angrily replies "I say we're a couple!" It's the point of the expectations vs reality scene. Tom thinks it's going to be the rekindling of their romance, but Summer knows she's just inviting a friend over to a party with a bunch of other friends.

In Tom's mind, it's obvious they're a couple, in Summer's it's obvious that they're not. And since they don't actually have a conversation where they hash it out, there's constant conflict.