MovieChat Forums > Revolutionary Road (2009) Discussion > Do you think Frank loved April?

Do you think Frank loved April?

posted 13 years ago by est333
44 replies | jump to latest

It was made clear in the movie they jumped into marriage too early, and that April quickly found she wasn't in love with him, but it didn't seem clear to me if he loved her. It seemed like he was more realistic and willing to make an effort with their marriage after his affair considering divorce was out of the question for them. I think most (if not all) relationships lose the spark after so much time, and couples get tired of listening to each other as was shown at the end when Mr Givings turns his hearing aid off when his wife speaks. However, I think Frank made more of an effort and tried to speak up when things were going wrong and I think that showed he loved her (or at least more than she loved him). What are your opinions?

[–] whitespirit26 13 years ago

Oh, he definitely loved her. And I think she loved him, but had a problem disassociating him with her failed dreams.

[–] wicked-artur 11 years ago

I complete agree, they did love each other madly, which made their separation and her death all the more tragic. Read more about exactly why their relationship fell apart here: http://alphashadowsblog.wordpress.com/2014/03/06/revolutionary-road-film-review/

[–] manderin-m 13 years ago

I haven't seen the movie (apparently it's not on Netflix) but I read the book. I hear they're pretty close, so this should still be accurate.

I don't think Frank ever loved April at all. In the book, it says that Frank thought of himself as just an ordinary guy and he always loved a certain type of woman but he never thought he'd actually get one for himself. Then he was at a dance (I think?) and he saw April and she was his idealized type and somehow they ended up together. He didn't care that April was emotionally damaged. He went for her based solely on her looks and how he thought she was going to be, based on those looks. They obviously had enough in common personality-wise that the relationship continued, but I think he loved the idea of her, not April herself. Yes, he complained about suburbanism and being forced into the molds of society, but he still did what was expected. He found a woman he thought was ideal, he married her, he talked her out of inducing a miscarriage even though HE didn't really want kids either, he got a boring desk job (at his father's company no less), he got a house in the suburbs, he supported his family, he was a MAN. Despite all his protesting, he still conformed to what society dictated and part of that was loving one's wife and with such an amazing woman as his wife, why wouldn't he love her? He thought he did because that's how things work.

[–] ThatPeskyGhostWriter 13 years ago

But isn't that the basis of just about every relationship? The idea of your expectations colliding with the reality of things? Just because Frank had an ideal woman doesn't mean he wasn't attracted to April. I think he did love her, but over the course of their relationship, the romance wasn't enough for April to be happy. Frank was challenged by April and felt the same desperation April felt but manifested it in a different way.

Yes, Frank fell into the hole of reality, but he accepted and confronted and conformed even to the situation he was about to enter. All he wanted was April's support. April, on the other hand, just didn't want any of that. It doesn't make her a bad person, and it doesn't put her at fault either, this lifestyle was just her undoing.

"'When you are grown up and very lonely, you will understand. Love, Uncle Fester.'....He's a dead man."

[–] tbradydvm 13 years ago

I watched the movie a while ago and just finished the book last night and I mostly agree with you. I think Frank loved that April was "a first rate" looking woman and she seemed to admire him. That made him feel good. I also think that is also part of the reason his marriage went so awry. In order to keep her admiration he constantly felt he had to be a certain kind of man ("the most interesting man I ever met"), which meant he couldn't allow himself to accept that he could be happy with a steady job and a family, living in the suburbs. To do that, he betrayed her image of him and the image he tried to cultivate of himself in his mind so he always felt confused and torn and uncomfortable.

However, I don't think it means he never loved her. I think he did love her in his way, but I think his love for her was based primarily on how she made him feel when she was happy with him, rather than on a real understanding and appreciation of who she really was.

[–] firstclasstrash 13 years ago

I actually think he did. He really did. I figured from a couple scenes, because he really tried to make it work, to help her the best he could, but I really felt it in their last scene together: breakfast.
He seemed so confused yet delighted that she was interested in him, in his job and not judging him for wanting to stay in Connecticut. When he asked her "so you don't hate me, or anything?" is what did it for me. The relieve on his face.

And for a moment I thought that she loved him too, that her "hating" him was heat of the moment talk. But the way I see it, she cared about him - how could she not? - but loved him? No. She cared about him enough to give him the breakfast he wanted and tell him what he needed to hear, because she knew full well when she woke up that morning what she was going to do.

She cared about him, but Frank, he really loved her.

[–] ally_peters 12 years ago

I agree! You summed up my thoughts exactly.

[–] whitespirit26 12 years ago

I think she loved him, but when you're as caught up in depression and insecurity as she was, it's hard to step outside yourself. She planned to abort, not to die.

[–] burger1124 12 years ago

Great post. You summed it up beautifully.

[–] jimmypage195 11 years ago

i agree with your post, for the most part april wanted to make frank happy so they could go to paris so she was using him but frank did really love her.

[–] TwoThousandOneMark 13 years ago

He loved her but he wasn't 'in love' with her.

[–] coco-su 13 years ago

Yes. He loved her very much. I agree , he wasn't "in love " with her anymore. They were too different, she was a free spirit and he was more old fashioned, stable - and in a way - a coward when it comes to changes.

[–] 13 years ago

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[–] lavinder11 12 years ago

I.... don't think she was a free spirit at all. She was confused. They both had their own ways of showing their cowardice. Hers was blaming her "misfortune" on him.

My word is my *beep* bond!
-I Love You Phillip Morris

[–] Loomis_Orange 13 years ago

Frank wanted to possess April. It hasn't really changed that much. Men still try to possess women and act like they know what's best for her and shush her in public places and talk over her and grab her physically by the hand and remove her from situations the man deems unsavory or controversial or when she is "getting out of hand" It's men's nature. Back then women were changing and men didn't know it. Men went on as their fathers did.Expecting " their " women to act as their mothers did... but BANG! Something blew up in their faces and the women they'd taken for their own possessions suddenly had a mouth to speak up and began using it. Men felt freakishly small and demasculated. They no longer had control. They flew off the handle and tried beating their women into submission.. had them analyzed and submitted for observation.. She's not actin right - She must be crazy

Accept Loss ~ Jack Kerouac

[–] ThatPeskyGhostWriter 13 years ago

That's true, but I don't think that was the case in Revolutionary Road.

"'When you are grown up and very lonely, you will understand. Love, Uncle Fester.'....He's a dead man."

[–] Loomis_Orange 13 years ago

How wonderful to be drawn back here for something as utterly empty as that thought. Thank you frank01.

Accept Loss ~ Jack Kerouac

[–] ThatPeskyGhostWriter 13 years ago

No problem.

"'When you are grown up and very lonely, you will understand. Love, Uncle Fester.'....He's a dead man."

[–] 13 years ago

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[–] maggimae83 12 years ago

Good discussion here. I think Frank was in love with the "idea" of April. She was a good looking woman whom other men desired. And he "possessed" her. Never mind that she was emotionally damaged. And I must say, good old Shep would have probably dumped his wonderful wife to hook up with April. Pretty much an indictment of men in the fifties. Hope things have changed, but not sure they have.

maggimae83

[–] jajceboy 12 years ago

I think he did love her actually! He loved her more than she loved him!
But he wasn't in love with April any more. He loved her enough in order to make their relationship work, because he felt that was his duty as a husband to make it work!
But he wasn't in love with her any more. He fell in love with her when they first met, but it quickly ended. Their marriage was just a long continuation of their first date, and shouldn't have happened

That's how I see it at least!

[–] Gary-Oldman 12 years ago

I think that Frank loved the idea of April and the woman that he wanted her to be. Frank loved himself

[–] Brendan86 12 years ago

Totally agree with this assessment.