MovieChat Forums > The 40 Year Old Virgin (2005) Discussion > We need more Public Awareness of Involun...

We need more Public Awareness of Involuntary Celibacy and the Pain it...

posted 10 years ago by TheMasterDebater1985
33 replies | jump to latest

In America we need more Public Awareness of Involuntary Celibacy
and the Horrible Pain and Misery it Causes in Men and Women,
But women are Rarely Incel,
The Horrible Pain it Causes in Men, Men who want to score and get laid
but are unable to, men who can't get girlfriends or even a date,,
and the Horrible Pain it Causes Men, oo
I'm not talking about Men paying for Sex with Hookers,
Involuntary Celibacy is a REAL PROBLEM, wanting Sex and a Girl, but not getting it

[–] Icecutter 10 years ago

[deleted]

[–] leetron 10 years ago

What do you have to offer the woman that would make her attracted to you?

I see post after post after nauseating post on here by and about "incels" just complaining and complaining about their lack of loving, and how, if women were just more accommodating to their needs, things would be fine. You're putting all the impetus to change on the women, and none on yourself.

Maybe you should try a different tack, because whining about it on an internet movie forum doesn't seem to be resolving the issue. It might even be making it worse.

Instead of focusing so much on external circumstances (women) that you can't control, why don't you focus on self-improvement and turn yourself into something women would be attracted to?

Go take a long, hard look in the mirror and ask yourself: "If I was a woman, would I give this guy my number?" And be honest in your answer.

It's up to YOU to put in the effort to become attractive. To become boink-worthy. What do you have to offer? What makes you special? If you sit around waiting for the rest of the world to change to accommodate you while you do nothing, then you will die a virgin.

Hey Whitey! Where's your hat?

[–] SoFarDown 10 years ago

I see post after post after nauseating post on here by and about "incels" just complaining and complaining about their lack of loving

No offence, dude, but what are you talking about? Masterdebater's posts not withstanding, that is not happening on this board. This place is dead, and there are quite a few topics concerning the movie. One week, I counted three or four posters bashing this place. There were more complainers complaining about complainers than there were actual complainers complaining about themselves.

Again, I think you give pretty solid advice for a lot of people, but not the weirdos left mulling around this board. I don't know about masterdebator, but the rest of us know where we stand. Well, me and Hansen, anyway. Msgrand seems a good guy, he just works a lot. I haven't seen a lot of the real hardcases around for quite a while.

Anyway, on a related note: today's forecast--dark and cloudy, and chance of drive by.

[–] leetron 10 years ago

Sorry... sometimes hyperbole gets the better of me.

It's just that once in my life, I was very shy and just "couldn't" meet girls with an eye towards romance. I engaged in self-pity and blame transference, very similar to what I see in the current "incel" paradigm. And I stayed single and alone.

But, then, I bought into the idea that every man is in charge of his own destiny. I launched on a program of self-improvement that involved better grooming, better diet, greater frequency and intensity of exercise, and ceasing to numb my brain with TV and video games, and you know what? Real changes began to happen. I became attractive and the ladies started to notice. After that confidence grew, along with my shoulder muscles, and what do you know - Even more ladies perked up. At least two of them went as far as to see their unborn children in my eyes.

It's totally up to you, and only you, to create and present a package that is desirable. Women like and desire sex just as much as men. They're just a little pickier about who they take as a partner. So you gotta step up!

If I can do it, anybody can.

Hey Whitey! Where's your hat?

[–] 10 years ago

[deleted]

[–] brux (14840) 7 years ago

>> It's just that once in my life, I was very shy and

The main thing in life is the closed mind. You think you and your
experience represent everyone, or that everyone that does as good
as you or better is worthy and everyone that doesn't is not.

This is a fallacious way of thinking ... a form of confirmation, especially
dangerous for the young who don't know anything about life. They
are brainwashed to believe the garbage they read and see on TV, but
that is synethetic experience, there, paid for, to get people to think a
certain way for the profit of others.

When you get older and have more experiences, and know more people
with experiences and see how life is, if you are normal anyway you start
to become more aware of how little like other people everyone is, there
is no normal, there is no judgement that is valid.

It is very comforting to think you know something, but most people don't,
and it is built that way. Look at our news, and our schools, we are now
told as little as possible, because to know a lot makes us a threat to the
status quo. As long as people bicker over BS on chat boards they are
not unifying and questioning the government and the way things are.

[–] [deleted] 6 years ago

What are you talking about leetron?

Firstly, the OP, to his credit, was not blaming anyone for his circumstances.

Okay, I can't, admittedly, sympathise and endorse his desire to 'score and get laid'. Perhaps if he didn't look at women as potential sex partners, and instead focused on building friendships and relationships, irrespective of sexual intercourse, he might, inadvertently, end up with a better sex life.

But that said, he doesn't appear to be blaming women for his single status (which would be deeply problematic and make him come across as a stereotypically misogynist 'incel'). At worst, all he's asking for is a bit of sympathy. And unless he's been abusive, either verbally or physically, to women, or spoken of women in a misogynist and sexually entitled manner, I don't think extending a modicum of sympathy to him is completely unreasonable.

As to your advice, I am tall, slim, fairly muscular, have a normal BMI, am well-dressed and well-groomed, exercise daily, eat a very healthy diet (no meat, no dairy, no drugs and very little alcohol), I don't play video games and watch only a minimum of TV, and I am regularly complimented by women and men, have various female friends, and yet I am still single. Sometimes it just comes down to personality. You can be the best-looking and dressed guy in the world, and still be incredibly shy, insecure, and worried about annoying women by asking for their phone numbers.

Ultimately, the OP has a point. Involuntarily celibate women and men shouldn't be demonised (unless they are misogynist and acting in a hostile manner), and although NO-ONE is entitled to sex, we can still sympathise with those people who aren't getting any.

[–] Jason-Y 9 years ago

Some women could be incel if they're overweight, socially isolated of both. In fact, I bet there are a lot of them.

[–] SALTER-pt 9 years ago

Why? What would increased public awareness do?

Salter you can paint your AUssie...you are a joke - Matty1933

[–] NoOneCares_LOL 9 years ago

(So why don't you make a thing for sexually frustrated men and women, then go meet each other and fvck?) LOL

[–] freebird1987 9 years ago

There's no such thing as involuntary celibacy.

[–] Jakethemuss 9 years ago

Public awareness? Awareness of what? Its not like this is some terrible disease or affliction. I have been celibate my entire life, very little of it by choice. I do believe that the world has bigger and better concerns than worrying about guys who experience loneliness and don't get sex. Its one of the pains of being human. It can suck to be a virgin and single your entire life, but that person can't expect attention or sympathy for their predicament. What you are suggesting makes the problem worse than it is.

I also see that Elliot Rodger was referenced. Yes, he did class himself as incel and was deeply troubled about his lack of experience with females. He was also however, extremely narcissistic, detached from reality, mentally disturbed and spoiled rotten. The kid was like a second-rate Patrick Bateman. Its a shame that so many wierdos saw him as some kind of martyr when in fact he just murdered a handful of random people after writing a huge, unspeakable essay displaying how far gone he was.

[–] Thee_Justin_Sane 8 years ago

First you get the money, then you get the power, and then you get the women.

Wether you pay a whore for individual sexual encounters, or you put a girlfriend on retainer.
Either way, you have to pay for sex.

If Mick Jagger was poor, he'd be a 70 year old virgin.

[–] Silverman (270) 7 years ago

You aren’t entitled to pussy. Here’s a pro-tip - if you aren’t interesting or good looking enough to get the girls you want, bang a fat chick. Keep lowering standards until you get laid. Problem solved

[–] not_a_virus.exe (1267) 7 years ago

How do you remain hard enough to finish doing a fat chick? How do you get hard in the first place?

[–] actionkamen (23176) 7 years ago

Viagra could help.

[–] not_a_virus.exe (1267) 7 years ago

I doubt it.

[–] Silverman (270) 7 years ago

Just jerk off with her pussy.

[–] [deleted] 6 years ago

Or, how about meeting and speaking to people, getting to know them, and then, potentially developing relationships based on love?

I doubt many 'fat chicks' would appreciate being treated as charity cases.

[–] Silverman (270) 6 years ago

I’m speaking a language “pussy whiners” may understand in order to convey where the imperative rests, and to erode the sickening sense of entitlement they possess.

[–] [deleted] 6 years ago

^ This guy is way more dangerous and disturbing than the OP.

At worst, the OP is a 'whiner'. But Thee_Justin_Sane, with his misogynist reference to women as objects to be purchased, is far more problematic.