MovieChat Forums > Catch and Release (2007) Discussion > Guys Who Cover For Their Friends

Guys Who Cover For Their Friends

posted 18 years ago by ljt99
33 replies | jump to latest

First I would like to apologize if this topic has already been posted since I have not read all the threads. I realize this probably sounds like I am being uncomprimising and taking some things about this movie way too seriously (heck I am, I'll admit it) but I simply do not understand guys like Fritz's character. Sure he lived in L.A. but I was left with the impression that he at one point lived in Boulder for some time, or came to visit. At any rate, he had probably met Gray more than once and knew her while Grady was cheating one her. Yet he essentially decided to cover for his friend who was doing something blatently wrong.

The fact is the real world is full of friends just like Fritz. Friends who either know or are even friends with a person's significiant other, and continue to cover for their buddy even if it sometimes means lying to their face. I'm sure every person has their reason, I don't know him/her well enough or their relationship, its none of my business, loyalty to their friend, people aren't perfect, etc. etc. etc. However the fact is that cheating on someone is just worng. People don't always do the right thing, but I guess I'll never understand guys(and yes many girls too) like Fritz. Oh well.

[–] Promontorium 17 years ago

I knew a woman who was being cheated on and I told her. She told me to F%#K off and that was it. What right did I have to tell her about her life? She never left him and they lived happily ever after.

The kind of guy that would be the friend with the kind of guy that cheats, probably doesn't think it is a big deal. Some people just don't stay with one partner. I don't think that in itself is wrong, but lying about it just makes them all douches. If a woman is with a douche, then she's probably a douche herself, and F%#k them all.

Or at least, that's why I won't ever try again.

Appreciation isn't a test of intelligence.

[–] acquiesce03 17 years ago

This is sort of a confusing story, but it relates to the topic.

I was a music ed. major in college, and was very close with the other people in my department. We were always in the same building together, we took classes together, and we were in ensembles (band choir, etc.) together. Everyone knew everyone's business. Well, there was this one guy who was notorious for sleeping around. We're talking more than 10 people. Whatever. He's a good friend of mine. Well, he's also one of those guys that can be so sweet that he can catch you off guard. A real gentlemen (except for the sleeping around part).

Anyway, he started to charm one of my really good female friends. She was also my sorority sister (you know how that goes. we're supposed to be like REAL sisters *rolls eyes*) Like any girl who has never really seen the evil nature of a broken heart, she thought that he was really into her, and that he would change for her. The rest of us knew that he would never change.... not even for her. She asked me if she should date him. I told her the truth. I didn't call him names or anything, but I told her about his reputation. I just didn't want her to be hurt. Not only did she date him, she freakin' told him that I told her not to date him. I can imagine how that conversation went. "I'm so happy! And to think that acquiesce didn't think I should date you."

The next time that guy and I had a long conversation (a few months later), the topic came up. He told me that he knew I said that, and asked me why. I fessed up... I told him that he's my friend, but so is she. I was trying to save her from getting hurt. She asked me my opinion, and I never thought they were a match... so I told her. He wasn't mad about it, and we're still friends.

Now that you've read that lovely little glimpse into my boring college days, I'll tell ya what I think. People are only going to believe what they want to believe. Sometimes you could tell someone, get someone to back you up, and even have a video of the cheater in the act, and the person you tell will still say "No. He/She would never do that." That girl had seen him cheat on other girls, but she still went out with him.

If you feel that you should tell the person, then it's really up to you. You do need to be careful about your own reputation, though. Sometimes people have a way of turning these things back around on you and making you look like the bad guy or girl. I'm not saying that it's not a perfectly lovely thought to tell someone, but I am saying that more often than not, you'll lose a friend (maybe 2) if you do. I've had friends that I've told, and friends that I haven't. I guess it just depends on the people you're dealing with.

"... you can't drink and come to work, you're not airline pilots ..."
--Dr. Cox

[–] SirusBlue 17 years ago

As with most people I agree that this sort of situation should be determined on a case by case basis.

If it's sort of a confession that they needed to get off their chest at the time and it took place in the past, and it's long and over, there's no need to dig up the past. It'll only cause heartache.

However, if it's a present situation, while covering for that person would seem to be the most honorable thing to do, placing your friendship above their relationship, I believe both the friendship and their relationship should be on the same plane. Them putting you in that position doesn't exactly make them the greatest friend in the world. If I was stuck in that position, I believe the best thing to do would put them on a time constraint, giving them a week or a month based on the situation, before telling their significant other. They can cuss and scream all they want to, but in the beginning they were the ones that put themselves in that position, and in reality you're doing them a favor, cause if they were happy with their relationship they wouldn't have cheated in the first place. In time they will realize that you did them a favor, and instead of probably losing both friends (that is if the significant other was a friend) you more than likely will strengthen them both.

[–] lovely1089 16 years ago

i personally think cheating is wrong. i mean if your gonna cheat then DONT GET INTO A RELATIONSHIP!!!
you cant have it all. and that person will eventually find out.

anyways
if i was in fritz situation i wouldn't say anything either its none of my business ......

thats just something i wouldn't bother to mess with.

[–] RoxyGirl77 16 years ago

I completely understand your point of view. We know that Grady was very close with Fritz, as Gray said he was the only one that Grady could be himself around. That's close friendship. That being said, wouldn't you cover for one of your closest friends? Your best friend? If your best friend cheated on his/her boyfriend would you bust them? Is it worth your friendship? My two closest friends and I have been friends for 15 years. Even if I didn't agree with what they were doing, which I would probably voice, I wouldn't tell on them. It's about loyalty to your friend, not their partner.

[–] Howlin Wolf 16 years ago

Ok, not seen this movie yet but this is more of a general question so I'll weigh in with my approach...

As calculating as this may seem, it all comes down to who I've known longer. I may disagree with something a friend is doing, but if it's a choice between protecting them or thinking about the feelings of some person I wouldn't even know had my friend not introduced us, then I'm there as backup. As a considerate guy it would pain me, and I'd do my best to try and get them to suck it up and take the rap themselves, but if push comes to shove then my loyalty is to the person that I go way back with. You don't throw away a longstanding friendship just because a pal of yours makes what you consider to be a mistake.

So yeah; I've had to gloss over the indiscretions of a friend before, and I'd do it again, too...

It's made from bits of real panther, so you know it's good...

[–] shmourtney 9 years ago

It's definitely wrong. I had a friend that cheated on her boyfriend. I didn't even like her boyfriend, but I didn't cover for her. I didn't tell, either. I was just like "leave me out of it." I kind of stopped being friends with her after that, but if she had asked me to lie for her or go along, I wouldn't have. Lying for your friend IS getting involved. Staying out of it is neutral. Telling the person they're cheating on is also getting involved, on the other end. I don't think you should have friends that cheat. What's to stop them from cheating with YOUR significant other if they wanted?