Mine:
Outside the diner
P.M.: They want my to coler my hair blond.
H.B.: With you colering?
P.M.: What was Barbra Steisand's eight album?
H.B.: Color Me Barbra
P.M.: Stud
H.B.: Everybody knows that?
P.M.: Everybody where, the little gay bar on the prarie?
there's more. that movie had me rolling.
Howard: I'm gay
Emily: You're what?
Little girl: He's gay.
Emily: (Shouting) I heard him!
Emily: Does anybody here know how many times I had to watch Funny Lady?
Howard: It was a sequel. She was under contract.
Emily: *beep* Barbra Streisand, and you!
Emily: Is everybody gay? Is this a Twilight Zone?
Emily: I need a heterosexual male, CODE RED!
"Is it just me or does anyone else see the little fashion elf?"
Emily: I'm ready! It's a medical condition! I love you.. I'm all packed..I have the airline tickets!
Peter: I'm gay.
What did everyone think of Kline & Selleck's drawn-out kiss at the intersection?? Pretty sexy!
"If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything!"....
Glenn Close nominating Paul Newman and Clint Eastwood for films called "Coot" and "Codger" - LOL.
The dancing scene to "I Will Survive".
The "Intersexual....homosection.....INTERSECTION!" bit.
The bit at the wedding when Debbie Reynolds looks daggers around the church when the priest asks if anyone objects....classic!
Sonya trying to dial a number on the 100-type phone....hehehe.
Howard's father coming with a paper pag containing food for Howard....
Howard: "What is it?"
Dad: "Wedding cake."
H: "She's diabolical."
D: "She's insane!"
When the women are "coming out" to each other with private things.
Besides anything from the "be a man" tape ("Men do not dance. They work, they drink, they have bad backs, they don't dance!" and "Be a man! Kick someone, punch someone, bite someone's ear! Think about John Wayne, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Arnold doesn't dance, he can hardly walk!"):
-Howard Brackett is a big homo, queer, Mary, sissy man! He just came out at his big church wedding! Martha Stewart is furious! There. Is that what you want?
-That was great stuff.
(Howard punches him)
"I love you!"
"As a brother?"
"No, I really love you!"
"As a friend?"
"No, I really love you!"
"As a cousin?|
"No, I REALLY love you!"
"As a pen pal?"
I laugh incredibly hard every time I see that scene.
IRON MAIDEN
JUNE 6TH, 2008
REXALL PLACE
BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE
"IS EVERYBODY GAY??!"
share"I was FAT!"
:)
Emily: "I'm a mess...and I'm STARVING...!" (And she's completely covered in her wedding dress so you can't see her at all - that's hilarious.)
Emily: "Is EVERYBODY gay?!?!?"
Peter: "Mom, Dad, Sparky, I'm gay."
Tape: "Untuck your shirt. Just one side."
Howard: "Awww."
Tape: "You hate this, don't you?"
Howard: "Well, LOOK at it!"
Tape: "You want to be NEAT! You want to be TIDY!"
(The entire masculinity tape is the best part in the movie.)
Tape: "So, how did you do, pussy boy?"
Carl: "Why are we talking about Howard?"
Teacher: "He likes dick, Carl!"
Carl: "Dick who?"
____________________
Screws fall out all the time, the world is an imperfect place.
No one's mentioned it yet but the part when Howard goes to see the priest and Howard tells him that he's never been "intimate" with Emily and the priest goes "he's gay.. yes, he is!" lol
I just died laughing at that part!!
I'm watching the movie right now and it's hilarious!
Ava Blazer: "You can't be gay! You're a tramp!"
The term "tramp" cracks me up. I think most people who use that term are old timers.
Emmet Wilson(postman)
-Is this national?
-you bet.
-Please, use your full zip codes!
- I'M A FEDERAL EMPLOYEE, AND I'M GAY!
Very funny film, and the postman's was hilarious.
Dude, I can't believe I'm the only one that hardly laugh when his mother tried to fix what he said, on wedding, which was something like this:
"Howard: I'm gay
(everybody in silence)
Mother: What he meant is he's having a wonderful day"
It felt soooo funny the way writers portrayed how mothers try to fool themselves and not believe when their big guys are gay!
My favorite scene besides the long drawn out kiss between Howard and Peter is between Peter and Emily the bar.
Peter: I've had a bad day...a very...very..very bad day.
Emily: Excuse me?!?!!
Peter: You win!
His timing on that line is hilarious!
Oh and "Is EVERYBODY GAY? Is this the Twilight Zone?"
If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, nobody else wanted them either.
(after finding out that her fiancé Howard is gay ON HER WEDDING DAY!)
Emily: Thank god my parents are dead. This would have killed them!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(talking to Howard about what motivated him to finally "come out of the closet")
Peter: You know, one day, I just snapped. I just got tired of switching pronouns and remembering to lower my voice. And I couldn't take lying to the people that I love. Does that sound familiar?
Howard: (lowers his voice in order to NOT SEEM "GAY") No!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
(while listening to the "How to be a man" tape)
Voice on tape: Now, repeat after me: "Yo!"
Howard: Yo!
Voice on tape: Hot damn!
Howard: Hot damn!
Voice on tape: What a fabulous window treatment!
Howard: What a fabulous -
Voice on tape: That was a trick!
Howard: Ugh! Damn it!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Howard starts dancing to the song "I Will Survive")
Voice on tape: Truly manly men do not dance!
Howard: (to the tape, after he stops dancing) Oh come on!
There's a diner down the block. Go eat something. I'm begging you.
You look like a swizzle stick.
Great Matt Dillon Line!