Weird things you did as a kid...?

Cute stories, barry. Mine are more about the weird ideas I had as a kid, although some of them made me act accordingly.

I believed:

- a perfect career goal was McDonald's cashier, as I believed they got to keep all the money in the register.

- on the rare occasions I was allowed to have Coke, I would insist on adding ice cubes to my cup, because this seemed to magically increase the amount of Coke in the cup

- characters on television and movies are just pictures. But newscasters (for some reason, particularly those on PM Magazine) can see you in your living room. Thus, when news shows were on, I would not be in the living room wearing only my underwear. Though it was okay when watching the Muppets.

- At night time, the sun turns into the moon.

- When playing at Daytona Beach, I really wanted some binoculars so I could see Africa.

- The water in a water fountain goes down the drain and immediately comes back out of the spout. So don't drink after someone you don't like, because their spit is in the water now.

- I found a box of checkbooks in my dad's desk. Checks are money. Dad has lots of checks. We must be very rich.

Things I had trouble understanding:

- Leave it to Beaver was from almost 30 years ago, so it was in black and white. Little House on the Prairie was 100 years ago, so why was it in color?

- If Star Wars was a long time ago and in a galaxy far far away, why did they speak English and have spaceships?

- How can all record albums look the exact same yet play different music?

- The offering plate at Sunday school and church made me wonder- when and how does God come pick up the money? And would he really mind if I kept my quarter and spent it on a Sno-Cone instead? After all, if he really needed my quarter, he could just take it out of my pocket. So if I get home and still have my quarter, it's going to the ice cream man. (Just that once, of course.)

- We love the Dolphins. We love the Seminoles. Who do we love more if they ever play each other?

- Why is there a rest area on I-4 right next to our exit? We don't need one so close to home.

These are funny!

I collected rocks as a kid but I went beyond that to drawing them a house on poster board for them to live. The poster board would lay flat on the floor & I'd draw a floor plan of a house. I'd use a marker to label my rocks mom, dad and then name their kids. I'd use tissue for beds, raisin boxes for furniture and so on.

When I first saw sap coming out of trees I would cry because I thought the tree was bleeding and dying.

I use to think that when my dad went to work he would draw lines and work on drawing them all day long. I'd over hear him talking to people and he's say thing like "I work the line." My dad worked at a factory where they made plastic bags and managed a group of people.

My grandmother use to always say "Heavens To Betsy" when she was shocked or surprised. She would look up as she said it. So as a kid I thought she praying or blessing someone who was dead named Betsy. I use to ask who was Betsy and didn't understand why people laughed.

Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop & look around once in awhile you could miss it - Ferris

I was still playing with dolls when I was learning about puberty and sex and such, and I occasionally made my dolls more anatomically correct with Silly Putty, and darn it those dolls made use of their new genitals.

I used to think that Stop signs were two-sided. Of course the reverse side had a green "Go". I thought there was just someone basically hiding on the side of the road to turn the sign from Stop to Go, and then back to Stop once the driver drove on. Think about if that was an actual job, how low the unemployment rate would be.

Haha, I like this thread. I can't think of anything overtly weird I did or thought as a kid, but I'll try to recall and come back!

I remember thinking that when I watched TV, that it was actually peoples lives we were watching. And that through the TV, people were also watching my life too.
And when I would get in trouble or sick or something, I would be so embarrassed that everyone saw it on "my life show."
WTH???? Ha Ha Ha

whenever my parents were being obnoxious to me and I would stand up for myself like Theo Huxtable, I would walk away for a couple of feet and wait for the audience to applaud and the scene to end.



Oh God. Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more.

These are hilarious. Bordering f-ing adorable.

When I was around 4-5, my mom made me wear jingle bells on my shoes, so she'd always know where I was, so I couldn't cause any more trouble... Like the time I sent a display of mannequins rolling down the aisle at Bergner's, or drew a picture of boobs on a desk calendar at the Christian book store.

Oh boy what didn't I do that wasn't weird!?

1. I LOVED sliding a barbies high heel shoe on and off repeatedly lol WTF?

2. I was terrified to ever get the mail because my grandma said The Boogeyman would get me. I imagined a black figure with a top hat?

3. For the hell of it I said aloud "I love the devil" for absolutely no reason or provocation! I was 4 haha, and I didn't love him lol. I Got Spanked that evening.

4. I would prance around saying "Chica chic aaa um bow bow" after watching The Secret of my Success and loving that song.

5. I actually thought Gushers Fruit Snacks were going to turn my head into a fruit.

6. My mom and aunt have told me that I would walk straight to the pantry upon visiting my aunts house and pull out a Mrs Butterworth bottle and wait for her to talk!

7. I had a fascination with oil wells calling them Puck Pucks?

There's many more lol! I was very impressionable haha.