MovieChat Forums > The Way We Were (1973) Discussion > Never feel this is a romance

Never feel this is a romance

posted 12 years ago by MistressKitty
13 replies | jump to latest

Their relationship was never portrayed in a very romantic light in this movie to me. I want to love them together and to love the movie but I don't. I just watched it again for the 3rd or 4th time and it still gets on my nerves.
She is so needy and he is so much of a jerk. He couldn't handle her being a strong willed woman and she never thought enough of herself to think she deserved him.
He cheats on her and then leaves her and his baby. This is not my idea of romance. There is also no chemistry between the two of them even though so many people seem to think there is. They never fit together. She fed his ego and he fed hers. That isn't love.

"Double, double toil and trouble; Fire burn, and cauldron bubble."

[–] ChitoRaffferty 12 years ago

They never fit together. "
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Yup.

There is also no chemistry
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Nope. There is chemistry.

Really I don't know why some posters don't get it but you can be absolutely crazy about someone but still find them impossible (for whatever reason).

" See dat scenery floatin by, you're now approaching NewportRI." Cole Porter

[–] hodie 12 years ago

And what I will never understand is how two people who drive each other Crazy can stay together for the long haul. Oh, wait...

"Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?"

[–] TANSD76 12 years ago

I think they had moments but I agree with you for the most part. Any romance was very underdeveloped and mainly left to montages. But if you don't believe them as a couple then the rest of the story loses its tension.

[–] seahawk3133 12 years ago

I feel the fact this wasn't a perfect "romance" is what made the movie better. We got to see deeper into two personalities that just don't work together.

The "drunk sex" scene really shows that even though she is strong and independent on the outside, she is desperate and vunerable on the inside. An amazing scene for a movie I was just lukewarm about

[–] Jockey1 11 years ago

Agree completely about the sex scene. Probably one of the most emotionally well done I think I've seen.

I agree too with the last point that the fact it was an imperfect romance made it more real. Most movie romances tell us love overcomes all obstacles...in the real world, it so often doesn't. It reminded me of Annie Hall, the way the relationship feels doomed from the start, but you're kind of willing your gut to be wrong! I think to enjoy any romance, you have to believe in who the characters are and their relationship. Not the greatest film I've seen, though I enjoyed it, and that was because I believed in the characters. They loved each other, but that was always likely to not be enough to keep them together.

[–] 11 years ago

[deleted]

[–] hmguk90 11 years ago

That's the point. It didn't last because the relationship was completely forced and based on her chasing him right from the start (which is a lesson for every woman watching it - if you have to chase him, he's not interested enough).

I couldn't stand Katie and she was basically, to me, an example of a woman doing everything wrong.

I liked the fact that the movie was realistic. They weren't right together and it wasn't one of those romances where they wanted to portray an "impossible" relationship working out.

[–] first-things-first 11 years ago

They both loved with conditions, conditions that were part of their foundation. Unlike those conditions that can be swayed, where to live, how many kids, pets, sometimes careers and politics. Hubbell's line in the sand was hard to find because he could change it to meet the situation, as long he didn't fail. Failing was something he couldn't handle. Whatever he failed would be the thing he wanted most, and it defined him. Katie was idealistic, wanted the best in everything, and that's not realistic. One of the best scenes is when Hubbell reminded Katie of Roosevelt's support of Germany before our participation in the war and she laughed it off. Hubbell had a valid point, but Katie knew better. Just like her support of communism. On paper, any government can be great. It's the details of the plan that prove it if works. What it does to the people.
In my opinion, there was romance when they were on the same page (however they got there). But it wasn't a strong bond because it was challenged by failure, and not supported by truths. When Hubbell and Katie meet at the end, he knew he wouldn't meet the family he gave up. But that didn't stop him from missing her, so there was love. And Katie finally understood him, longing to be with him. That's called love too. I bought their bittersweet love story, better understanding it now.

If we can save humanity, we become the caretakers of the world

[–] jfitz_returns 10 years ago

I agree with much of what you said but I think there was chemistry, it just wasn't sweet romantic chemistry. She was clearly infatuated with him, idolized him, yet nothing he did was good enough for her. He seemed to admire her passion and intellect but she was just exhausting. It was a chore to be with her. It was quite the role reversal wherein it's usually the guy that is the nerd placing the cheerleader on the pedestal then forever being disappointed with the real thing, and she finding his endless expectations exhausting and stifling.

But Redford and Streisand certainly had chemistry.

[–] oknar1977 10 years ago

not only it never felt like romance even moreso the dialogue and their "struggles" they seem childish and katie's character is making fuss about non important small things, it looks funny. as if a small child acts like what it saw adults fighting and then it mimics the adults. nevertheless, i liked the movie. i feel like leftist myself but katie is annoying. i can understand why other hates her aggressive act in collegue and at parties. robert redford's character is not jerk, he acts and behaves like normal person, tries to help katie to settle down and become normal sociable lady. why would he stay with someone who is stubborn child trapped in grown woman boday? i don't see katie as strong willed woman, she is just plain drama queen. i prefer communism over cruel american sort of capitalism but the truth is that with her salary back in 1940-50s as a waitress she couldn't afford an apartment in a communist country.