MovieChat Forums > Nigel Lythgoe Discussion > Making the first move…

Making the first move…

posted a year ago by Ripkens25 (2066)
5 replies | jump to latest

I’m not saying I don’t believe Paula Abdul. However, any time an intimate moment happens… it’s because someone makes the first move. If not, there would never be a first kiss, a held hand, a hug, etc. etc. Granted, a great deal of this is predicated on being able to read the room, and pick up on signals. However, what once may have been considered simply someone making the first move spontaneously… these days, may very well be considered “an assault“.

Men in particular need to be extremely careful these days when initiating ANYTHING. Fair or not, that’s the climate we now live in. And I do see this as an opportunity for SOME to take advantage of the situation financially.

[–] sslssg (35178) a year ago

Again, this is all alleged, but I don't think that the first move should involve touching anyone's genitals or breasts. If he did that, then yeah, it's assault.

[–] Ripkens25 (2066) a year ago

You make a fair point….and sure, I suppose there’s a spectrum.

I’ve had women grab my ass before. Never considered suing them for millions. A woman grabbed my junk on a dance floor in New Orleans. Didn’t consider suing her. But yes, there’s certainly a reasonable line that shouldn’t be crossed, unless the signals to do so are unequivocal.

I just think that (some) people are playing victim…for a money grab.

[–] sslssg (35178) a year ago

I do disagree, and have an issue with the suing for millions. In so many cases in the past, that's how so many wealthy men got away with rape, assault, and harassment.

I don't know about grabbing ass being assault, but I do think that the woman who grabbed your "junk" on the dance floor was assault if it was uninvited. The problem is that Lythgoe is rich and can be sued for millions. That woman on the dance floor, probably not. It's too bad that a lot of people won't look at these as the same situation, but I think they are.

One thing that I am happy about is that consent is being discussed a lot more now that it was in the past. I don't know how often those of my generation and older were told to take unwanted groping as a compliment.

[–] Ripkens25 (2066) a year ago

At the rate society is moving, between lawsuits and cancel culture, I think just about any spontaneity will have to be replaced with verbal consent. And even then, the regret of a sexual encounter after the fact (the next morning, or 20 years later) could turn into a huge payday.

[–] Stratego (31075) a year ago

I don't believe Paula for one minute, she clearly needs some dough.