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You really messed up,ain't you?
She will find out sooner or later,it's just a matter of time.
If you trust each other,then you should admitt your mistake,some women appreciate honesty.
Be honest with her
MovieChat Forums > General Discussion > [deleted]
You need to tell her, preferably before she moves in. You f’ed up you need to own up to it.
shareIt's only going to get harder the longer you wait. It will be painful, but you will be better for it, whether or not your revelation breaks up the relationship. If it's gone, it wasn't meant to be and would have happened later under worst circumstances. If it works out, the two of you will ultimately be stronger for it.
shareSo, this is what was was meant by " taking this chat board to uncharted territory ? " And the infidelity thread was baiting ?
The pain of betrayal often runs very deep and is sometimes insurmountable.
I was trying to feel better about my actions by watching those movies but I can’t
shareHave you ever read Poe's The Tell Tale Heart ? She'll read your body language over time and figure it out.
You're just going to have to face the music.
Did you cheat for sex? Because your gf wouldn't? Or, wouldn't often enough? Or, wouldn't to your particular desires?
shareOne thing not to do is to delude yourself that watching movies about infidelity will teach you how to deal with your present situation.
You need to provide more information. How long have you been seeing each other? What kind of commitment, if any, have you made to each other? Do you both explicitly and NOT implicitly understand that it’s an exclusive relationship? How emotionally (not physically) intimate—CLOSE—are the two of you, e. g., can you start a sentence and she can finish it, or the reverse? Are you engaged? Is she, as someone implied, moving in with you? What are the circumstances of your infidelity? Did you pursue her? Did she seduce you? Were you sober? How many times? Are you likely to see this other woman again? And why did you betray your girlfriend? There is no one-size-fits-all to your question.
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If you tell her the images will stay there in her head, FOREVER. If you tell her you'll both suffer. If you don't you'll only suffer. It serves you right to suffer.
Do penance, make it up to her unbeknownst. Put her on a pedestal & keep her there.
In my experience, too many men don’t understand that a woman may forgive, but she will NEVER forget. She will take that memory to the grave with her. So I agree, Culburn; but, if this is a fairly new relationship, the best and hardest choice may be for him to break it off and spare her that pain and create space in her life for a man who truly treasures her. Only if he knows this will never happen again and that she is his soulmate will he be able to summon the strength to bear this burden. Even then, I would strongly recommend formal couple/marriage psychotherapy. Professional help can be a Godsend.
shareYour first sentence says it all. It is the goods, R_K.
shareWhat a thorough assessment. Since the OP is coming clean to us about infidelity in order to ease personal conscience, I sincerely doubt shouldering the burden like water underneath the bridge is possible. Best to be amicable and seek out professional help as you recommend if the relationship is to survive and prosper. Right now, it is only fleeting based on our assumptions.
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Be honest, and tell her. She'll find out eventually, and it will be better if it comes from you.
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