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Pieces of Her, Lou, and The Old Man are the Same Movie, and Its a Bad One (SPOILERS for all)


Movie stars and TV stars -- in slightly different ways(movie people are more elite, TV people are more relateable) eventually become the FIRST reason to watch a movie or new series. That's why studios and streamers hire them.

And that's the first reason I took a look at three recent "streamer" productions -- two of which were one-season series(with maybe more to come) one of which was a stand alone movie of less than two hours.

I watched "Lou"(the stand alone movie) mainly because Allison Janney was the lead.

I watched "The Old Man" (a series) mainly because Jeff Bridges was in it -- and for the special reason that Bridges(one of my favorite stars) had to survive both cancer(now in remission) and COVID to make it. It is a star performance that is also an act of bravery. Moreover, the high caliber character star John Lithgow(also now old) was along for the ride as Bridges colleage-friend-nemesis.

I watched "Pieces of Her" at someone else's insistence, but quickly came to realize that the star selected to anchor this one was Toni Collette -- not really a movie star at Bridge's level, not really a household name like Allison Janney (who also, like Jeff Bridges, has an Oscar to her name) EVERY new TV show, streamer show, cable show or even garden variety network show has to have at least ONE name actor in it. Consequently, any actor who was ever in ANYTHING is castable forever after. Rainn Wilson, for instance, or Oliver Platt(who takes break acting on his Chicago TV series to act on the Chicago streaming series "The Bear" about a chef.)

And here's the thing. The Old Man, Pieces of Her, and Lou are all pretty much the same movie. With the same lead character. And pretty much the same premise:

Character: An old person who lives alone and gives others a wide berth. But this old loner turns out to have "a past" as a spy, and "a specialized set of certain skills" that allows their 60 or 70 something old self to beat much younger people in fights, sometimes to the death.

Premise: For various reasons, the "past comes back to haunt them." Their cover is blown -- in the one with Toni Collette, ala an old movie called "The History of Violence," their killing of a psycho criminal in a public restaurant saves lives, gets TV coverage -- and brings old enemies on their trails.

Complication: Our old loner-spy with a past -- has a family member and either a broken bond or a strong one with that family member. We're talking sons, daughters, grandkids.

It remains open as to whether the series "The Old Man" or "Pieces of Her" will continue to a second. It would seem dicey with the 70-something Jeff Bridges as he continues to deal with his bout with cancer. It would seem unlikely(unnecessary) with Toni Collette if only because her series wasn't much.

And while there is an opening for a sequel with "Lou" -- the first damn movie is so bad, predictable and lazy(less Janney's committed performance) that the idea of a sequel is downright offensive.

But lets look at what these three lookalike movie/series tell us about entertainment circa 2022:

ONE: The aging Baby Boomer population needs action heroes. This started with Liam Neeson in Taken back in 2009, but actually Neeson only seemed middle-aged in that one -- believable enough in his many fight scenes. Neeson has since made more and more "Taken" clones(none as good as the very good "Taken" was) but he is looking progressively older in them (just as Charles Bronson did, back in the day.) No matter, the older audience must be served. We were given The Flintstones when we were kids. Now we get old people beating the crap out of young people in mano-y-manos(Bridge's big fight was a believable close range grapple and strangle) and martial arts (the idea being that old people and tiny women can best bigger foes with the right quick moves.)

TWO: Name actors love Netflix and Hulu pay. Especially Netflix pay. "Lou" is a very bad movie but you can bet that Allison Janney saw the biggest payday of her life to make it. Big stars like The Rock and Ryan Reynolds (and Leo and J-Law for prestige) have done Netlfix movies, along with Sandra Bullock and Adam Sandler. None of the movies are particularly memorable but the pay has been astronomical. And if it works for Sandra Bullock, it will work for Allison Janney. I'll bet even the lesser known Toni Collette got BIG pay to have SOME kind of name for "Pieces of Her."

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THREE: The plots and dialogue can be pedestrian. We got movies just like this back in the 70's -- "The ABC Movie of the Week," which was never REALLY a movie (just a one-time piece of episodic TV), the plots were predictable, and the casts were drawn from current and fading TV stars("Tonight -- Christopher George, Vic Morrow, William Windom and Lynda Day George IN!") These Netflix/Hulu movies have a professional, digital gloss that "disguises them" from the more flat and tacky looking 70's TV movies but the demoralizing effect is the same: these are REAL movies. REAL effort didn't go into the scripts. And the only REAL positive to any of these films are, quite simply, their stars. Jeff Bridges, Allison Janey and Toni Collette have proven themselves elsewhere and we welcome them into our homes, no matter the vehicle.

You can say: "If you didn't like these movies so much, why'd you watch them?" Especially the series. The answer: oh, I had nothing to better to do. And I like Jeff Bridges and John Lithgow and Allison Janney. ("The Old Man" even pulled 90-something Joel Grey out of mothballs, fascinating to see HIM.)

And I can also say: the history of movie and TV entertainment is that a lot of mediocre stuff has be to made to "feed the maw" of entertainment audiences. Audiences and (sometimes) the Oscars know the movies that MATTER: Hitchcock movies and Ford movies back in the say; Scorsese movies and Spielberg movies(sometimes) and QT movies today. Generally you aren't going to find something as unique as "The Sting" or "The Exorcist" on a streamer.

But sometimes you WILL get quality. Scorsese gave us his prestigious and valedictory "The Irishman" on Netflix, and The Coens gave us the stylish quality of "The Ballad of Buster Scruggs." But these are anomalies born of "major filmmakers lured to Netflix" -- yet again by the super budgets and pay doled out there.

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For the rest of the time you get The Old Man, Pieces of Her and the truly awful "Lou" and here's the thing:

These productions may not be much WORSE than the old "ABC TV Movie of the Week"(s) ....but at least we got those "movies" for free on broadcast TV.

The streamers make us pay for that kind of mediocrity now.

Thank goodness theatrical films and occasional surprises like "Buster Scruggs" and "The Irishman" break the mold.

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