Tenet (2020) AKA the convoluted live action wankfest version of the superior video game Braid
SPOILERS FOR THIS FUCKING FILM
-so this film is about SCIENCE
-and its like really clever too
-there's lots of complicated plots points
-carefully explained via characters explaining each part
-point by point
-to each other character
-usually in a cafe or in the middle of the street
-even on a public bus one time
-anyway so following the plot is manageable
-if you turn the volume up when they speak
-and then down immediately after when there's LOUD NOISES
-but the plot is retarded and everyone looks retarded walking around backwards
-and the dialogue is gay as fuck too
-it sounds like it was written by me when i was 16 and trying to sound smart
-like with robin pattersons character
-he flicks his hot sexy hair about
-and is all like "time is an inversion of particles flowing
through time itself."
-"our inverted selves cant alter our present non-inverted selves by influencing change in our past selves present time"
-"its what we call a quantum leap of logic and inverted suspension of disbelief"
-*looks at other character and smiles*
-"But thats fate"
-and at one point they tell the gigantic blonde girl that everyone thats ever been born will die
-and she's like "but does that also includes my son?!"
-just so the audience understands her motivation in all this
-cos the cessation of all human life ever and the inversion of time and the world itself is not motivation enough to get up off your arse
-sums up all women ever tbh
7.5/10