It would be funny if Katie actually died of...
...a baterial infection due to having sex with a shower curtain.
"Jake, I'm sorry to tell you this, but Katie didn't die of the virus. She got a bacterial infection. It appears that she had sex with a shower curtain. I know you really cared for her, but she must have been into some sick *beep*
"Sex with a shower curtain? Uhhh...yeah...what kind of a freak would do something like that..."