How dare Robert (spoilers)
Once a cheater, always a cheater. Robert being mad at Sol for sleeping with Frankie and not telling him is ridiculous. After all they cheated on their wives for 20 years with each other. Learn to share I guess
shareAgree, and I thought Frankie apologising to Robert was very misplaced.
To me there is something wrong with the central premise of the series, that peace and happiness can be won at the expense of others' pain, especially the pain of people who love and trust us. Sol articulated this very well.
In Grace or especially Frankie's position, I do not think I would want further contact with my ex, and I wouldn't offer support either. It would take a long time to forgive the deception and betrayal.
I didn't think Frankie apologizing was misplaced. That's something I would do. Grace and Frankie are actually really good people. They both have character you don't often see in television.
Thank you for agreeing with me on Robert overreacting. I'm still mad about it haha
Are you saying that if your husband of several decades left you for a woman/man, after carrying on an affair behind your back for 20 years, you'd apologise to his new spouse if you slept with him once?
share[deleted]
As Calibay said, yes. It's often referred to as being the bigger person. I have often apologized to people for things that I didn't start. Even if that person is wrong I'll apologize. Life is too short to argue and be mad at one another, and honestly, I can't remember any of those disagreements.
I can't say I wouldn't be torn apart and heartbroken if my husband cheated on me. Of course I would, but what does "getting back at him" or punishing the person he cheated on me with accomplish? Absolutely nothing.
Ok then! Good luck to you both. I am sure you have warm friendships with burglars who rob your house, ex-lovers who give you STDs, backstabbing co-workers who sabotage you to your boss, vandals who spraypaint your house, and other lovely people.
shareYou sound like a bitter person. How can you compare someone robbing your house to this situation, where these people are still friends but had a setback in their relationships? People with attitudes like yourself are the reason this world is becoming so bitter. Learn to forgive others, including yourself. You'll be much happier
shareAnd you sound like an idiot. Twenty years of betrayal culminating in the abandonment of a marriage to a 70 year old wife for a (male) friend she trusted is a SETBACK? Forgiveness is one thing, but lack of boundaries and lack of self-respect is another.
shareHow is remaining angry going to solve any problems?
shareThis is television and it's always an unrealistic mystery as to how characters who have had incredible conflict and done each other enormous harm are somehow interacting peacefully in the very next episode. Generally life doesn't work that way. While I do not personally know of a situation like the one depicted in this series, I do know of plenty where a loyal, unsuspecting longterm spouse has been abandoned by her husband and a good friend or even her sister. Such women do not recover easily from such betrayal. My impression from watching this series is that Robert and especially Sol are selfish and immature, expecting support and friendship from the wives they betrayed. Although the series shows Grace and Frankie as having landed buttered side up from their husbands' betrayal - they have everything going for them, including new romance on the horizon - realistically, this is unlikely. Women of that age, in that position, are likely to end up alone and broke.
shareI completely agree with you. I actually posted another thread where I stated unless the first series took place over the course of a year, I would need a lot more time to feel comfortable around Robert and Sol, but a relationship with either of them, is almost inevitable, especially since Sol keeps coming back to Frankie. I also agree that Sol and Robert are not good people.
Having worked in nursing homes I can tell you it's completely realistic people in their 80's and even 90's to fall in love. It's a human necessity to love and be loved.
You do sound very bitter, and I'm sorry for saying that. Not everyone hates their ex. Yes, this is a TV show and there is a bit of suspension of belief that needs to happen, but I also think that as viewers we project a bit of ourselves into the situation on screen. To say that
Women of that age, in that position, are likely to end up alone and broke.isn't all that true either. My opinion on that matter is that it would be just as easy if not easier at that age than a woman in their 40's to start over. I also think that being left for a man is very different than being left for a woman. I don't think that the level of betrayal is the same. I'm not saying that it isn't as hurtful or any of that, I just think that it's on a different level. Also, no one was abandoned. Abandonment is entirely different than being cheated on and getting a divorce. Why would they end up alone and broke? Grace had a successful business. Even if neither one of them ever worked, they were married to lawyers, who I would have to assume make good money, they would be entitled to either some support.
Again, this is my opinion, but there would, or should have been some part of Grace and Frankie that knew, if not the affair, but at least about the sexuality of their husbands. It might not have been obvious, but somewhere deep down, they should have suspected. People do get hurt and betrayed all the time, not all of those people turn to hate. While this show might not be the norm, I don't think that it's that improbable either. share
I don't have a dog in this particular fight, as I am quite happily married and my husband is unlikely to run off with anyone, male or female. But I found Frankie's heartbreak following Sol leaving her for Robert to be very moving, thanks to Lily Tomlin's excellent portrayal. Grace and Robert obviously had a lot of distance in their marriage, and I doubt she would have been surprised had he left her for a younger woman, but the Bergsteins really did seem to be a close, happy family, and Frankie was blindsided by Sol's decision.
As to your opinion that women over 70 have an equal chance of starting over as women in their 40s, (remarriage) statistics do not support this. Also, women's standard of living is generally reduced following a divorce.
What a great response. Apologizing is such a great way to clear the air even if you didn't initiate the issue. Even if the other person never apologizes to you, it frees you too be on in a positive way.
shareI agree with you. Frankie apologizing was the not only the right thing to do for Sols sake but most importantly it was the best thing to do for herself.
And though it was not her intention, it shed light on the fact that Robert never apologized for the pain he caused her. Frankie is also not one to hold on to negativity and emotional baggage. She had to cleanse.
I wonder if she apologised to emphasise that Robert never did apologise to her for a much, much greater wound, similar to someone being excessively polite as a rebuke to someone who had been rude to them. To me, it's just so implausible that these discarded wives could be on cordial terms with their unfaithful exes, at least not so soon, given that they are not sharing child-rearing. But yes, if you do have a cordial r'ship with your ex, it would be normal to apologise for causing any upset.
However, there is no doubt at all that both Robert and Sol were ashamed and sorry at having hurt their wives as they did. Not enough not to do it, but still..