It was obvious to me that Kay wanted to, especially in the club bathroom scene where he turned Marc around. Do you think thats why Kay left because the relationship was mostly on-sided?
Writers get paid to lie and tell moronic, sophomoric, biased, vapid, and empty stories.share
Obvious, was it? Really?
Remember Marc was unsure his own sexuality, and to have gone "bottom", if you insist there has to be a "top" and "bottom" (not my personal experience over the years)would have diminished his masculinity in his own eyes, and he would have run away from gay sex,and any gay relationship, in all probability permanently.
Kay left because he saw or thought he saw his love (not only the sex)was a one-way street. Who with a degree of self-respect stays in such a relationship? As it was, he over-stayed.
Imo at that point Marc wasn't yet confident enough, he still needed to feel like the 'man' in their (sexual) relationship. Maybe like that he could still deny that he was actually gay (or having gay sex).
Do you think thats why Kay left because the relationship was mostly on-sided?Yes and no. Not because of that certain situation, but because Marc wasn't ready to live freely. Marc clinged to his delusions because he was afraid to face what he felt and the consequences that would follow, and Kay realized that Marc wasn't ready for a relationship with him.
I really agree w/ what ronfirv said, but in my opinion and feeling, Marc seems to be the guy that likes to do with giving, Kay didn't seem that way to me, just a bottom to Marc. Lol
"Just because you can't understand something, doesn't mean it's wrong!"
Seriously? That's what's important?
shareHow do we know he didn't? A lot of assumptions are being made based on relatively few scenes. Scenes which we get only glimpses of. We aren't shown the entirety of any of their sexual encounters.
Not even the handjob in the forest. That was also "cut for length", so to speak. In all likelihood, Marc didn't cum that fast. But did the director really want to film, and have the audience watch, a character get jerked off for several minutes? As it would happen in reality?
We don't know what happened fully or in between any of their scenes. Kay mentioned that Marc sucked him off. Did we have an oral sex scene? Would we have known that happened if Kay hadn't said it? Would we have assumed it happened anyway?
It also assumes that anal sex occurred. It might not have. I'm not saying it didn't but it's a possibility to be considered. They could've engaged in frottage or intercrural sex which can look very similar. That having sex must mean penetrative sex is a heteronormative viewpoint of the sexual relationship between men. More gay men than you know don't engage in anal sex at all.
Some men, but not all, are uncomfortable with the idea of "bottoming" their first go-round. Given what we know of Marc, that was probably the case. But we can't assume that he didn't bottom at any point either. He could've just needed to be worked up to it, and was.
Yes, some of us are strictly tops, or bottoms. When the man is more versatile, though, he may be more or entirely top in one relationship, but more or entirely bottom in another. Some relationships it's egalitarian enough that both are switches. It depends on the guy. Whichever it is, Kay strikes me as versatile.
By the way, Marc turned around to close and lock the toilet door. They were drunk and stumbling into each other. It wasn't because Kay was trying something sexual. Kay was busy wanting to kiss him and get to the Ecstasy in his pocket.
The point is, let's not make assumptions, or generalizations, about two men in a relationship when we're not given enough information to do so.
Kay left because he was done with giving Marc chances yet still being treated like a piece of ass on the side. Especially when it was clear that they had something together, or could have had. Marc needed to make that leap though and he didn't, or wouldn't. Kay had too much self respect to keep putting himself out there and sticking around any longer. Also, Marc told him to transfer and gave him back the key. That's a pretty clear indication to someone that it's over. Marc was the only reason Kay transferred in the first place. There was nothing else for him there, so he moved on. Probably heart-brokenly, but moved on nonetheless.
Exactly so.
Returning a key to a partner is as clear as it can get that the relationship is over.
Kay had enough self-respect at last to move on so he did. Hurrah for that.
Marc couldn't have made it any more clear other than by saying directly "it's over".
I've been on both sides of the equation at one time or another. I understand why Kay stuck around for as long as he did. There was a hope there. He would come so close with Marc, but then not quite. Marc gave enough to have Kay believe that if he pushed just that little bit more... Kay didn't want to miss the opportunity for something real. There was a spark from the beginning and he wanted to pursue it.
I don't know that Kay's had a lot of love relationships, but I don't think he's the cruising type either. He's probably just like most people - going from one monogamous relationship to another with some breaks in between. That doesn't mean that Marc wasn't a special case for him too though.
I'm glad that Kay had enough self respect to move on too. It sucks that he always got the *beep* end of the stick. Particularly when he wasn't at all demanding like most lovers can be in that same situation. Marc loved him, obviously, and made that clear in a lot of ways. But he also treated Kay like a disposable piece of ass on the side whenever it was convenient.
Not even a text when his son was born, and shrugging off his "congratulations" like it's nothing? Really? That's the least he would do with a friend, if nothing else. No one's going to think you're screwing each other by showing some common decency, Marc.
All in 24 hours, Kay was humiliated in front of Marc's family, beaten up by Limpinski, and broken up with by Marc in a rather *beep* way. Total *beep* day, that. I'd move on too.
We are in agreement again.
I also understood why Kay stuck with Marc for as long as he did, but unsure from the film if it was weeks or months, but more likely months. As you said (again so spot-on) he saw hope.
Like you, I was there once, about 10 years ago. Fell for a guy who was hetero., recently finished with a relationship and had newly started a new one but to cut a long story short, we just got on like, well, a house on fire. trouble was we worked for the same organisation. We saw eye to eye on everything and had a near perfect work relationship too, and yes, it was noticed. He was a real looker. He was the perfect flirt, kept giving me hope, in lots of ways. I said once to a close friend (female) after I had quit the company,and spoke of the guy to her, that he had put his foot in the water and must have found it too cold, and she said, no, he put his toe in the water only and had been in love with me being in love with him. So, yes, like Kay, I saw hope and the guy, like Marc, kept me dangling. It's unfair and selfish, but no one forced me to wait, I was willing.
When Kay moved on, as brutal a way as it was, to be honest, Marc had it coming. He prevaricated with Kay and dithered, because on his side, he was mixed-up inside and by the time he knew which side he must jump on and get off his fence, the prize bird had flown the coop! A lesson there for those who hesitate in Life?
It's always the attractive, charming, attention-loving ones. Seriously. I feel bad for what Marc went through too because I've been there myself. But I didn't treat my Kay, for lack of a better word, as though they were expendable. It's not easy for any of the people involved in that sort of situation. Marc did have it coming, you're right. Who of us haven't missed an opportunity because of fear? The ending was painful because it's so true to real life.
shareYou're right again ; we have to stop agreeing like this! :)
Missed opportunities? yes, been there for the reason you gave but through advice from a best friend, became bolder and with it, more success, not 100% of course, but way better. Not all guys have that impetus, alas.
Yes, a painful end but as you have stated, Life.
Strange in a way, the OP hasn't returned to defend her statements or expand on her questions? Or maybe not.
We live and we learn, and we hopefully don't make the same mistakes. I think if life hasn't beaten a man down then more of us would be bolder from the start. That's not the way it most of the time though. We have to work through and overcome all those years of conditioning first.
Yeah it is weird. I'm opinionated and antagonistic though. If I were any of these OPs I might not want to respond to me either. :)
Yes, so true, in Life, especially forming relationships, how many times have I said to myself, if I'd known then what I know now!
What's the ancient saying - Fortune favours the Bold? It usually does.
Or, as the SAS motto - Who Dares Wins.
I empathise with your final para. I suffer similar "virtues" and have been accused on IMdB more than once of arrogance and sounding as if my view is the only one. Not the case but I am so sure in my opinions, or beliefs, I do naturally come over as perhaps a tad arrogant. Not my intention at all.
Underneath that, I am a regular guy, honestly! :))
Now, c'mon guys on this board, join in - all this agreement between the 2 of us is getting humdrum! (Just jokin').
I've been accused of being arrogant more often than not. Which, exactly, isn't my intention either. I'm actually very open to other viewpoints and totally a regular guy. I'm also very strong in my convictions and enjoy metanalysis and a good debate.
shareI think he left because he felt ditched. He wanted more, maybe just attention, and was "caught in the act" by his supposedly girlfriend.
Anyway marc was a responsible father who did not want to screw up his family. What would you do in that situation? Pack up and leave? Plus the wife was getting suspicious.
Blondie kay or brownie marc?
shareIn my opnion Marc was too pussified about bottoming, it's clear he strugled with his own sexuality, there is this idea that bottoms are less of a man than tops and that was why Marc didn't bottom, Kay was open, but maybe Kay preferred bottoming, it's nice to feel someone loving you and kissing you while you stand doing nothing, i would say Kay felt more loved like that (With Marc doing everything, pleasing him and touching him), but i agree Marc feared bottoming.
Kay left cause he was far too much rejected, he was also in a bad situation, couldn't stay to suffer more so he left (but he still had hopes Marc would change his mind).
"No one is gonna take my soul away i'm living like Targaryen"
I agree with you.
Writers get paid to lie and tell moronic, sophomoric, biased, vapid, and empty stories.