AKA The Wet Dream of a Straight Male Millennial Biden Voter

I didn’t see the first one but this one wasn’t enough for me. Aside from the retarded politics straight out of a CNN writer’s fever dream, there’s no meat to the story. Teenage Girl But John Wick is not a movie. It can’t be. Also, the movie’s already dated—at this point “don’t call me sweetheart” is better left for bottom feeders like Kate Smurthwaite. A cool chick wouldn’t bat an eye at an old guy being polite. Especially if she’s already a final girl and been through hell.

I figured there’d be more of a story than The White Supremacists. But, nope. For instance, it seemed like they were setting up the wackily religious foster parents for some shenanigans. Same goes for the landlady’s brother. That stuff goes nowhere.

Not to say there weren’t some funny parts (old lady with a knife in her head during her last shot) but they didn’t do enough to take this out of the realm of padded SNL sketch. A few fun kills and some laughs but disposable and unmemorable.