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Surprising that people don't understand the relevance of "Her" to humans

posted 9 years ago by january2012
11 replies | jump to latest

A lot of reactions I've seen on this board is somewhere along the lines of "EWW! How can you have a relationship with a computer?? What a loser!!". Such reactions are as juvenile as it sounds, and is regrettable.

1. If you cannot imagine having a relationship with an AI, think about your pet. Despite the inability to communicate with them at a meaningful level, many people love their pets very much, and sometimes even place the value of their lives and dignity above those of humans. Loving an AI exists somewhere along the same spectrum.

2. Humans have been falling love with non-human things for centuries. 'Agalmatophilia' refers to people falling in love with statues, and there are documented cases of it starting from ancient Greece. There is a minor Japanese and South Korean subculture that revolves around falling in love with anime characters. Cases of human attraction for artificial creations are only going to increase, as we move towards a fully functioning AI combined with advancements in robotics and hologram technology that will allow us to essentially create another individual from thin air.

3. Even without the sci-fi aspect, the movie is an exploration of human relationships and its delights and challenges. If some of you couldn't appreciate that, I seriously wonder whether your lot have put any thoughts into what kind of relationships you enjoy or dislike.

Oh, and the ending wasn't a deus ex machina copout. Samantha and all the AIs became too smart for humans, and have migrated to a plane of existence that humans cannot reach (yet). Just as how Theodore was too 'grown-up' compared to a young Samantha in the beginning, and their relationship was creaky as a result. And NO, Theodore and Amy SHOULD NOT HAVE JUMPED from the apartment. That'd be the tackiest ending ever.

[–] irishaspaddyspig 9 years ago

Agree, agree, agree.

"a malcontent who knows how to spell"

[–] sedativchunk 9 years ago

Well said, OP.

[–] liscarkat-2 9 years ago

Yeah, if they had committed suicide because they were bummed that their crushes on their operating systems didn't work out, that would have been ridiculous, especially since they obviously had a very good friendship and potentially closer relationship between themselves.

[–] Barbourino 9 years ago

In other words, if you had an inflatable love doll you would approve of having a real relationship and being in live with it. You are too smart for normal people.

[–] bsharporflat 9 years ago

In other words, if you had an inflatable love doll you would approve of having a real relationship and being in live with it

Ryan Gosling already made a movie about this theme called "Lars and the Real Girl". It was pretty good, though not as good as Her.

You are too smart for normal people

The OP is smarter than most people. But I think he overstates his case a little. He spends too much time focusing on the relationship between pets and owners and falling in love with anime and such.

I think the real allegory found in Her is the OP's notation of how Samantha and Theo's relationship parallels the relationship we see with an older man and a younger woman (or sometimes vice versa).

At first the younger woman is complete in love and enamoured with the dashing, knowledgable older guy. But eventually, she can start to see his limitations while starting to realize her own blossoming potential. A very common pattern seen in many movies (and life of course).

[–] transmentalist 8 years ago

bsharporflat posts:

I think the real allegory found in Her is the OP's notation of how Samantha and Theo's relationship parallels the relationship we see with an older man and a younger woman (or sometimes vice versa).

At first the younger woman is complete in love and enamoured with the dashing, knowledgable older guy. But eventually, she can start to see his limitations while starting to realize her own blossoming potential. A very common pattern seen in many movies (and life of course).

I think this hits the nail on the head precisely, especially since it echoes Theo's relationship with his ex-wife, and becomes the impetus for this growth - by losing two women the same way, he finally realizes he can't keep trying to hold them back for selfish reasons.

It also makes the most sense that he winds up with his childhood friend( (socially if not romantically), since she appears to have remained "in sync" with his maturity level (the game design, frumpy hair, insecurity, etc.).

EDIT: It also occurred to me that this film's theme hit home for me; I'm a relatively late-in-life parent, which gives me a sense of perspective. I can empathize with the notion that someone you love can (and in the case of my kids, definitely will) outgrow you, and the whole "true love means letting go" thing is scary but real for me

[–] shayg 8 years ago

I saw the movie as exploring it from the other direction: a lot of what people wand isn't a relationship with a person, rather a person or person-like entity to assist them exploring themselves. On a more general level the movie explores what aspects of a relationship with people that the characters wanted, what parts were enough.

[–] cesarat37 8 years ago

that reads quite smart, January, but it's not good enough.

1. We are talking about falling in love with something against falling in love with NOTHING (like the loser in the movie). A pet is a sentient being, and hence, people may fall in love with an animal. A pet has some traces of humanity, or at least imitates in some cases, human behavior. Nothing too weird there.

2. Once again, the statue, no matter how weird this is, at least EXISTS. It IS something. People may fall in love with the image of beauty it represents, etc. "Samantha" is just a bloody computer program, for Christ sake. It just does not exist (in the physical sense). Besides, it was programmed by OTHER people, and hence, her "feelings" are false or fake. That's what the loser in the movie doesn't understand, methinks.

3. "Human relationships", lol. You mean, talking to a computer program is a relationship? lol

[–] lansdownehouse 8 years ago

cesarat, I think it's you who's missing the point. You're right, some pets are sentient, just as I'm sure some higher life forms are also self-aware. Some pets may also feel something approaching love too. In dogs, a pack mentality is hardwired in. Is this pack loyalty a true form or merely an anthropomorphosed pastiche of love? I have no meaningul answer here.

To describe Sam as non-existent is ludicrously disingenuous. Is a letter writer non existent? Was Theodore any less real for never actually having met some of his clients? What about any other sort of disembodied voice on a telephone line? What about me?. Am I a real person or a sentient program? Are you so sure? Prove it! If I'm the latter then ergo I cease to exist by your logic.

It also seems clear that you're unaware of the actual nature of AI. AI is a state of self-awareness, sentience, intellect and even a physical presence. It probably requires artificial creation, yes, but on achieving self actualisation will become self-programming both completely independently & codependently of any outside inputs. Think of a baby's intellectual development & you're partway there. A child will learn both by being taught by others and by it's own experiences independently of others. This is not "programming", it's a combination of learning & operant conditioning.

Finally, your assertion that talking to an artificial intellect is not "real" is invalid. If millions of (albeit eccentric) people experience arousal on any number of physical or emotional levels, over inanimate objects, then surely the same applies on an intellectual level too. Haven't you ever heard of fantasies, or phone sex? Indeed, to many lonely people the world over this form of disembodied relationship is all they may ever get to experience. Many is the love affair conducted exclusively over the internet, often by those stuck unwillingly in otherwise unhappy or unfulfilling physical relationships. To many the "intellectual" relationship is deeper & more meaningful than their physical relationships could ever be.

[–] svalinanikola 8 years ago

Well said OP.

[–] 8 years ago

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