1. Never mind real-life documentaries about pedophiliac priests whose lawsuits could bankrupt the Church into oblivion. What the Vatican REALLY doesn't want you to see are fake re-enactments of exorcisms.
2. Ozzy was right. Satanists really do use upside-down crosses in their ceremonies.
3. As per the video in the exorcism class, demonically possessed individuals will often quote dialogue from The Exorcist.
4) Everyone in Italy speaks brilliant English and will let you perform baptisms and sermons in a foreign language
5) Documentary film-makers have no idea how to focus a camera
6) You need atleast 3 different angles if you want to shoot footage inside a car
7) Hospitals will let you do as you please if you tell them that you're a priest as seen in the 'I'm a priest, help those people' line
8) A doctor will let you take one of his patients and perform an exorcism in his hospital no questions asked. He'll even give you 2 hours to conduct this.
9) There are 4 signifiers that a person's possessed but they need to show all 4 at the same time for you to fully believe it
10) A demon can transfer itself by simply touching you
11) If you are drowning a baby in Italy, nobody will stop you doing so. They'll just shout at you a little bit. You will also be allowed to leave the church.
http://benendsbasement.blogspot.com/
5) Documentary film-makers have no idea how to focus a cameraSame one I wanted to stress: documentary cinematographers can not possibly hold a camera still for more than one second and think that you're not doing your job if you're not zooming in or out.
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@10) A demon can transfer itself by simply touching you......didn't that happen in the exorcist as well
share11. The best cameramen suffer from Parkinson's disease
12. You only need to sit in a lecture for 5 minutes to learn everything you need know about excocisms.
13. Males can only be possessed by an already possessed female. Men, if you want to avoid being possessed avoid possessed women.
@12, i think they said you need to sit in a real exorcism for 5 minutes to learn it all
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Re point 11.
To be fair, these people would have hoped the priest would have known what he was doing and initially were unsure what was going on, eventually you did hear shouts and see people trying to stop him, and as for leaving the church, he was possessed and had superhuman strength so to speak. That's probably how he was able to escape.
Re: << 11) If you are drowning a baby in Italy, nobody will stop you doing so. They'll just shout at you a little bit. You will also be allowed to leave the church. >>
Right!
When the preist came back to his apartment after that, I was like, "Um, don't they want him? Like, down at the POLICE STATION???"
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17. When you know your friend (Isabella) is being possesed, put her in your car unrestrained, so that she can have a fit (turn into devil) and fight the driver, etc to get the car to crash so that you can die instead of tying her up first or putting her in the trunk of the car to be safe.
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14. Your mother gets possessed, you die
15. Connect the cuts was somehow, related to Connecticut...?
16. The ending credit of this film played for 8 minutes in a believably 1 frame/sec rate
17. These two were quite possibly the worst exorcists ever - The Laurel & Hardy of exorcisms if you will.
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"1. Never mind real-life documentaries about pedophiliac priests whose lawsuits could bankrupt the Church into oblivion. What the Vatican REALLY doesn't want you to see are fake re-enactments of exorcisms. "
But if you are really curious, there's a school with classes you can just go to whenever you want.
13. If you're going to baptize a baby, don't hold it underwater for no more than a couple of seconds.
I was kidnapped by a pack of mimes. They performed unspeakable acts on me
14. Eat a steak in a dark room. It'll make you look intimidating.
15. All possessed people walk around with pissed looks on their faces and never speak. This might get confusing if it's a possessed woman as she'll just be acting like she's having her period. (Speaking of...)
16. Possessed women will also start randomly bleeding like they're having their period. This is apparently scary/unsettling if you have a very religious old country Italian family as they won't know what a period is, or if you're a pre-teen boy that has yet to find out about that sort of thing.
If it's been fifteen years or more, it's no longer a spoiler.