MovieChat Forums > Borgen (2011) Discussion > The Husband

The Husband

posted 13 years ago by susan-wilde1
20 replies | jump to latest

spoiler ... season one

I love this show, really enjoy it, although I am not hugely political I think the relationships and moral issues are fasciniating

I was so disappointed that the apparently new-man husband who started so loving and supportive of the PM's election etc ... couldn't sustain it for even a year into his wife's term of office ... it would have been good to see bloke modelling a supportive role instead of him reverting to a stereotypes ego-centric whiner ...

I didn't know whether to be cross with the character of cross with the scripters for making him collapse so quickly!

What does everyone else think?

[–] originalpliget 13 years ago

I sympathise with you and can see your viewpoint even as a male myself :). I can see also however, how he would become disillusioned over the course of what looks like a year.

I think early on, when it was mentioned they would take turns to have their career come first that Birgitte was coming to the end of her period. Subsequently she makes Philip sell his shares and then give up his job and, all through this it is clear she is not really part of the family. Even when she is at home she is constantly rung up or pre-occupied with politics.

Philip is clearly meant to be a high-powered business person so it would seem there would have to be tensions and, I suppose, that is part of the story. I must admit though, I did like their earlier "flirting" very much and hope they can be brought back together again somehow.

[–] 13 years ago

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[–] Ras555 13 years ago

I think the beginning of the end of their marriage is when she says to him "End of discussion". Yes, she is the PM and she has to make the decisions at work, but it is too much for her to bring that home to her marriage.

I really don't even think he was having an affair. But then of course 11 months is too long for him to be living alone, I think.

[–] film_rat 11 years ago

I agree with you, Ras555. The problems, the (possible) conflicts etc. of the couple are spread over the various episodes, but put together, Philip tries to tell to his wife: "I am still in love with my wife, but I don't know about the p.m."; "You want that we talk? With you as the discussion leader?", and so on. Birgitte has changed so much in her first year of being p.m., and Philip does not recognicze her.

English is not my first language. Any corrections are welcome.

[–] trisul 12 years ago

She is doing her job, being PM is a 24h job, no way around it. The only way she could satisfy his needs would be to resign as PM. The choice Philip had, was to accept it was going to be like that for a number of years, or move on. Many, many women have made this sacrifice for their husbands and he could not. I think he failed her.

[–] Venilaa 13 years ago

I ended up hating him at the end of series 1. Just think if the positions were switched and he was PM. She would have been expected to stand by him. Instead he turns into this whiny jerk who runs out to sleep someone else because he's so unhappy that his wife has responsibilities like you know running the country

[–] oakcourt 12 years ago

I must admit I did think that myself Venilaa. On a lighter note he is just so attractive, I'd be really pissed off if I'd lost him!

[–] moviefan-3 12 years ago

I've had a crush on Mikael Birkkjær since The Danish Killing.

I hope he comes back. I'm watching Season 2, ep 2 and he wasn't in that one. Please come back in Ep 3! Though I agree that their marriage is over, still, their little son wants to be with him.

[–] oakcourt 12 years ago

I rather hope they do get back together, even though his new girlfriend is very nice. Cor blimey what about Birgitte getting it on with the driver!

[–] wunder-4 12 years ago

Don't worry he is back in season 3, that just finished running here in Denmark. But a lot have changed since season 2 - for everyone. That's all I'm telling.

[–] oakcourt 11 years ago

Just watching the first episode of new series here in the UK - just started. I have to say I think the hubbie is sexier than the current squeeze.

Don't be late, don't hesitate, this dream can pass just as fast as lightning.

[–] suicidea 12 years ago

I think making him a supportive, understanding, super-tolerant husband would be more stereotypical. The kind of man who always nods, gives a supportive smile and a pat on the back. That's not a real man, that's a woman's magazines' idea of man.

What Philip did can be interpreted as both right or wrong, but at least he acted on what he believed was right, not fold in like a house pet. He tried to discuss it with his wife at first, he mentioned openly that he was not happy with the arrangement. He did not sneak behind her back. So at least he was honest.

Plus, keep in mind that he's a very intelligent and highly educated man. He knows he's capable of running for high positions, yet he's stuck in a small job that does not satisfy him. That's a no-no for a man, knowing full well that you're wasting away your potential.

I'm not saying what he did was right, personally I don't think I'd ever leave a woman who's a loving wife, a good mother, successful at work and plus very hot. But try to see things from his point of view.

Never be complete.

[–] susan-wilde1 12 years ago

Depends what you think the male stereotype is .. I think making a man do something right and not being ridiculously selfish would have been the novelty,

You think the new-man type is the prevailing one .. where are you you seeing his appearance, then? I would be interested to watch some drama where an intelligent man actively supports a strong woman ...

[–] suicidea 12 years ago

I don't mean a real-life male stereotype, I mean a stereotype in movies, tv, etc. The supportive, ever-giving, always smiling man is a myth. It's easy to do it when everything is all sunshine and roses, but I wonder how many men in real life would still keep their mouths shut and support their wives when she had a great job that earned well, kept her in fron of the cameras and away from home all times, when he himself was stuck at a job that's far below his standards or ability.

We all tell ourselves "I'd do it, I'd still support my wife. I'm a modern man, not a brainless macho pig" but our genes will keep whispering to us in John Wayne's voice, "who's wearing the pants in this house?"

It's not enough just to have a loving wife, a man also needs to feel and know that he's the man of the house.

Just to make it clear, I still think what Philip did was wrong, but I think it was what we should have expected. Like Bent said, the politicians are not masters of business when it comes to their family life.

Never be complete.

[–] Stirchley 12 years ago

He did not sneak behind her back.

Except when he snuck into someone else's bed when things started to go wrong in his marriage.

[–] sokeyt 12 years ago

Perhaps it was a tad unrealistic that they didn't have a nanny or au pair to help out. The Prime Minister of a rich country dashing off to do the school run.... please!

However, she never expected to be PM, it all happened very quickly with no long term planning in place, so they just had to make it up as they went along.

And given that premise, it was a huge leap for Philip, without any payback. Birgitte got to be PM and everything that went with it; Philip did the school run, etc.

I don't see him as particularly egocentric or a whiner. It takes two to make a marriage and she changed first. The deterioration of the relationship was gradual and well done. When she scheduled two evenings a week for sex, you knew where this marriage was going.

Morse.Thaw. Redcap. Little Red-cap. Little Red Riding Hood

[–] frankey200 10 years ago

I know it's an old thread...

I completely fault Philip. They both made an agreement, and he simply folded due to his own selfish wishes. This is a once in a lifetime experience for his wife, and he couldn't show some patience for a couple of years, at least until her term ended? She's struggling 24 hrs a day to keep things together, and he completely abandons his support. What a jerk.

He's supposed to be this smart, strong man, and he couldn't control himself, and needed to act out within a few months? Of course there would be stresses and extra demands between them, but if he's such great CEO material, he should have been strong enough and smart enough to figure out some solutions. There's some flaw in the writing here.

As for the au pair situation, even though they had agreed earlier they didn't want one, they were both smart people, and should have figured out getting a nanny would have been the lesser evil. Again, some writing deficiencies here.

Edit: now getting to the end of season 2, she says basically the same thing to him: "you bailed on me after less than a year..." Nice to hear that.

[–] Pequod88 9 years ago

I've recently finished season one, and am very much looking forward to season two. I am very impressed with Borgen. The stories and cast are excellent. My only complaint about the first season is the way Philip reacted to Birgitte's demanding job as PM. He failed as a husband and father.

While increased tensions and a need to adjust were to be expected, Philip goes from smart, loving and supportive, to unfaithful and unreasonable in rather short order. While appreciating the need for conflicts to drive the various story/character arcs, I felt Philip's actions were selfish and somewhat unrealistic. As frankey200 rightly points out, there are some writing issues at play. The hiring of an au pair should have been a no-brainer.

Worse, the adulterous husband demands a divorce over the nature of the TV interview. Needing to manage public perception in the name of keeping her government from failing was a mild deficiency, imo. He took a job without discussing it with Birgitte, then used his having to resign as an excuse to be unfaithful. Childish. I, too, completely fault Philip (and I am a man, fwiw).

While the disintegration of the marriage was rushed and rang fairly false, I have no other serious criticisms of season one. I had read about the high caliber of this series, so my expectations were high. I was not disappointed. I'll have to avoid this board until I finish the series, but wanted to add my two cents in agreeing with those critical of Philip.

[–] roulin 9 years ago

I agree with you. I thought he came off badly. He seemed peeved that she couldn't be prime minister *and* be home to vacuum and make dinner. At one point she said "We could get an au pair" and he replied "We agreed not to do that." Why not!!?!?! Get some help in. As season one wore on he just got more and more whiney. "Let's talk about our relationship," she said. "Do we have to get parliamentary approval for that first?" he said. One snarky, miserable remark after the next. She's well rid of him.

[–] 9 years ago

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