Well.....It was better than Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III....

.....but that's really not saying much. If anything at all. TMNT 3 was a complete throwaway. No redeeming qualities whatsoever. Even the eccentric Stuart Wilson couldn't save that turkey.

Finally saw the 2014 one, and watched TMNT III for the first time as well, right before. You know, so that maybe the 2014 one would look good by comparison. It did, but not by much.

Things they did well:
I liked the turtles. The look. The attitude. The humor. Their personalities and relationship to one another. That was all fine, and I really had no complaints.

April O'Neil: Fox did an okay job. Was really bummed when I heard she was going to play April, because I'm not fond of her as an actress at all. But she did okay. Not great, but it worked. To Bay's credit he did seem to keep the 'Megan Fox is the sexiest woman of all time' gags to a minimum. Well placed, and funny in their way. When Vern crashed the van because he was staring at April's butt, that was funny.

Vern: BEST part of the film in my opinion. Will Arnett was great as Vern. Very funny, and the source of the only real 'laugh-out-loud' moment in the whole thing. When Mikey blew up his car at the end with the turtle van rocket. That was brilliant. Hadn't laughed like that the entire film, and didn't laugh like that at all during TMNT III.

Things that were poorly done:
Visual Effects - Yes, they were praiseworthy by volume. But really didn't add much to the experience. Looked like CGI, felt like CGI, sounded like CGI, was CGI. Takes me completely out of the story, and I get REALLY bored when I see it. It just doesn't work as well as practical effects, and maybe never will.

Splinter - Didn't like the look. Didn't like the voice. Didn't like the use of the character. I kept going back to how well Splinter was done in the 1990 film (which I love). THAT was Splinter done right. Great voice, and felt like a sage, or master.

Shredder - Again, done MUCH better in the 1990 version. In the new one, didn't like the voice, hated the design (HE'S NOT A ****ING ROBOT!). Nothing about either Splinter or Shredder was done well in the 2014 version. I was very disappointed.

I give Bay some credit, at least he's using some of the great characters from the TV show. But I've yet to see any real spirit in his vision of TMNT. Maybe the next one will be better, but given his track record, I'm not holding my breathe. Too reliant on boring CGI (no matter how much work went into it, it's still boring). Too much exposition in lieu of real, organic storytelling. Grotesque lack of buildup. They are always dropping you right into the action, with no buildup, no suspense, no delayed gratification. Those are all things that make a film work, and Bay and his crew have no idea how to use them properly.

But anyway, better than TMNT 3.