If Jackie's intent was to OD, why did she leave the bathroom? Why not die by herself?
Also, where did she get the heroin? Are we certain it was heroin and not cocaine?
Thanks much for your thoughts.
Literally just finished the final episode. She got the drugs from the coat of the junkie in the bathroom that she helped. He was the person the guy with the gun was looking for. The guy with the gun said "she just hit me with a brick and jacked my coke (I thought he said coke, but he could have said crank)". When they are transferring the junkie to the other hospital Jackie runs after him with his coat and he said he doesn't want it anymore.
I truly don't know if her intent was to OD, though.
Thanks!
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To your first question, I think her intent was to leave immediately (as she imagined), so that none of the colleagues she loved so much would have to see it happen. But this time, Jackie finally overestimated her physical ability to withstand drugs.
I do think she intended to die, however. Surrounded by the wreckage she'd created, completely unable to live up to being anyone's everything, a future of nothing but more of the same - at best - stretching out bleakly in front of her...
She just thought she would have made it a few blocks first.
"I'm a happy person, but an angry citizen." -- Lewis Black
I just finished the episode too, and was honestly confused & annoyed with how they ended the show. I'll assume she miscalculated her tolerance (not using for months during her probation at work), then possibly using a drug her body couldn't handle.
shareI also thought it was heroin, because as she was helping the junkie in the bathroom, she told him "let me clean up your arms", and something about his shooting in between his toes. I'm pretty sure it was heroin, something she was not used to, but I think she overdosed on it because she wanted to die. She didn't have much of a future, just more of the same old thing, over and over again. Very costly for one thing, and she just could not stop using, she did it for a year, but then went right back again, and she knew she would keep using. Snorting that much heroin would kill anybody.
Poyzunus 1
I honestly never thought she intended to OD. She had been clean for about 3 months and she just didn't have the tolerance level she was used to. that's what was so sad, she thought she could continue her using and everything would be peachy. and then she died.
shareShe got the heroin from the patient that had been in several times - the really belligerent heroin addict who said he would keep using, and was even shooting up between his toes. When he left for the last time, he told he he didn't want his personal effects, and that's where the heroin was.
As an educated nurse like she was, Jackie's intent was to OD. She was "out of it" when she walked out of the bathroom, thinking she was on the streets of NY. Considering the hospital was all out of meds at that point, the chances of her recovery were slim to none.
And, she knew she would be effectively ruining her career 100% when she OD'd and now she was being taken to Bellevue, which is where she got her new job.
Jackie was too smart to NOT know that amount of heroin would hurt her.
It was the junkie's stash that he didn't want. I was shocked at how much she snorted, as far as I remember she had never done heroin, so this was a deliberate thing. Zoey says "You're good" when Jackie prayed in opening scene to "please make me good."
++++++
Love means never having to say you're ugly. - The Abominable Dr. Phibes
Great connection...and sad that the only way she can be "good" is by not being.
shareI'm not certain whether her intent was to die; however, as an experienced nurse and drug addict she certainly knew she was overdosing. The final shot is ambiguous--she's still alive and semi-conscious. In a hospital, surrounded by trauma doctors and nurses, I think there's a decent chance she survived. If so, she almost definitely would have lost her nursing license. The rest of her life would most likely be bleak. The next season would have been titled "Burger Flipper Jackie".
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