Ian had a great personality and was cute in the nice guy, socially awkward way. (The way Jason Biggs wishes he was.) Why can't there be more Ians and less Lance and Rexs in the world? Message to everyone with a Y Chromosome...be nice like Ian and not a prick like Lance or Rex, the right girl WILL come eventually, but not if you're jerk to her!
~Please don't reply to me unless you are addressing my post directly. Thank you!~
But girls always go for jerks..
If you disagree with me and think I'm a total ass_hole, then why are you reading my signature?
No they don't! I don't! Ugh. I hate this myth, it's totally wrong. Only some (stupid) girls go out with jerks, and if they really are jerks, it doesn't last.
~Please don't reply to me unless you are addressing my post directly. Thank you!~
True.
I Am Who I Am.
Your approval isn't required.
exactly.
Roadkill--your advice is just that--roadkill.
Be the nice guy and be involuntarily celibate your whole life
And then leave them when they're tired of their bull**it.
I Am Who I Am.
Your approval isn't required.
I'm nice too but girls are such bitches to me. Even if I didn't do anything. The girls I know go out with guys who are such a*s holes.
sharehaha. the nice guy pays for dinner, but the a-hole gets the dessert... if you know what i mean.
Brandon
my weight only stirs the ground
There's tons of nice guys in the world that don't have any problems with the ladies. I think most guys are "nice guys." Though, a lot of "nice guys" come off as un-confident, which women aren't attracted to at all. Being confident and a little aggressive does not make you a jerk, and that's what most women are attracted to (well, that and looks of course). And women almost never take the initiative, so if you're just sitting around waiting for a woman to come along, it ain't going to happen. Guys have to be aggressive (take the initiative), try to at least look/act confident, and not get upset when shot down (which will probably happen alot due to the nature of the game :)). Think of it like an animal's mating ritual: Male presents himself to a female, then if the female thinks the male would be a good mate, she accepts the offer. If the female doesn't choose him, the male presents himself to another female, and the first female waits for another male to present himself, and so on...
shareTruth right here.
shareFor chrissakes, people. Learn the difference between 'nice' and 'inept.' I'm nice. I pay attention to women, don't cheat on them, always treat them with the respect due to them as human beings, never demean them or deliberately hurt them...and have never had any problems getting a date. Most of the people repeating the 'women go for jerks' mantra are either jerks trying to justify their behavior or pushovers/social outcasts trying to justify their lack of dates. The reality is, women go for all sorts -- and, yes, there's a sad subset that goes for the jerks because they lack self-esteem themselves. But being nice *and* confident immediately sends your odds skywards. If you're nice and women aren't going for you, I guarantee you that the problem is almost certainly something besides your 'niceness.' Maybe it's your inability to sell yourself, or a fear of rejection, or some other problem (and sadly, yes, looks and such can factor into that. Hard truth, man, but that's how the world works. Luckily, it's not the *only* way the world works)
But I'm telling you this now -- being a jerk ain't the mothership you're hoping for.
[deleted]
For chrissakes, people. Learn the difference between 'nice' and 'inept.' I'm nice. I pay attention to women, don't cheat on them, always treat them with the respect due to them as human beings, never demean them or deliberately hurt them...and have never had any problems getting a date. Most of the people repeating the 'women go for jerks' mantra are either jerks trying to justify their behavior or pushovers/social outcasts trying to justify their lack of dates. The reality is, women go for all sorts -- and, yes, there's a sad subset that goes for the jerks because they lack self-esteem themselves. But being nice *and* confident immediately sends your odds skywards. If you're nice and women aren't going for you, I guarantee you that the problem is almost certainly something besides your 'niceness.' Maybe it's your inability to sell yourself, or a fear of rejection, or some other problem (and sadly, yes, looks and such can factor into that. Hard truth, man, but that's how the world works. Luckily, it's not the *only* way the world works)
[deleted]
With Great Power and Great Riches comes great number of women.... hehe
shareI'm nice. I pay attention to women, don't cheat on them, always treat them with the respect due to them as human beings, never demean them or deliberately hurt them...and have never had any problems getting a date.
The OP is probably a 14 year old girl with ZERO life experience, so she doesn't realize how things work in the REAL world, not in stupid teen comedy movies. I'm not ragging on this movie, it's pretty good for what it is, and damn funny. But seriously, chicks dig a-holes. It took me a while to figure that out, but it's true. I'm not talking about beating women like a white trash piece of crap, but girls want you to be a bit of a bastard. Nice = Boring. Period. Free advice from someone who'd been there, done that and got the t-shirt.
shareNice is not boring. Boring is boring. I second the guy above who said there's a different between nice and inept. There's also a difference between being nice and being a doormat. If you do whatever she wants, if you pay for everything everytime you go out, if you never contradict her in any way, etc., it's not being nice, it's being a doormat. I heard a lot of stories by ex-girlfriends of mine. Like once she was on a date with a guy, and she asked what the guy wanted to do, and he said "I don't care as long as I am with you". All those things send the wrong message. That's not being nice, that's being a spineless doormat. I've scored hot girls in my time and I never treated them like bitches. But I'm not afraid of putting them in their place if they cross a line. Does that make me not nice? Or just someone with a personality who also has boundaries?
share[deleted]
LOL at this thread. OP doesn't even know what she wants.
Major Richard Winters: We're not lost, Private... we're in Normandy.
This is completely untrue. I've been a nice guy my whole life, to extremes... I still feel bad about things I did almost 20 years ago, if that says anything. Even remembering those things makes me feel bad. I very infrequently get girls by being Ian... but when I'm Lance, I can get girls that are way out of my league way easier than I should be able to. I even got a girl I had been crushing on since high school once when I happened to go to a bar she was waitressing at.
Basically, in my normal day-to-day life, I'm Ian, but when I want to get a girl, I know that the best idea is to be Lance because that's what works.
I have no enemies, but am intensely disliked by my friends.share
Men that think all girls just like jerks are most likely going for the supposed "hot girl". Maybe you should try being less shallow and go for girls that are intelligent and caring, and not just base your selection on looks.
If you go for a shallow but attractive girl, then you deserve whatever you get.
Get two birds stoned at once - Ricky
Who says a girl can't be a supposed "hot girl" while also being intelligent and caring? You're making it sound like looks and intelligence are mutually exclusive. You DO know that it's possible for a girl to be both attractive and intelligent, right?
I have no enemies, but am intensely disliked by my friends.share
That is actually not what I said, so calm down.
All I said was that guys should not choose a girl based JUST on looks but should look for a girl with a good personality first. Nowhere did I say that it was not possible to find a girl with a good personality and good looks... but you should be attracted to their personality as well, not just their good looks. I happen to agree that stereotypically 'hot girls' are more likely to go for an *beep* than for a nice guy but nice guys generally want those 'hot girls' and will ignore a regular girl like me because they just want some arm candy.
You probably have neither good looks, nor a good personality and I can see why you are disliked by your friends.
Get two birds stoned at once - Ricky
Physical attractiveness will always be a primary consideration for a person choosing a partner... what I find attractive in a woman might not be what someone else finds attractive, but regardless that person needs to be physically attractive in my eyes to be considered as a possible partner. Regardless of a person's personality, a real relationship cannot be formed if I'm not attracted to her physical attributes. Would you date or marry a person you found repulsive just because he had a good personality? If you say "yes," you are lying. I'm not saying a girl has to be a supermodel in order for me to consider her attractive, nor am I saying that her physical traits need to be perfect in my eyes in order for me to consider her, but attraction does need to exist.
It's funny that you would use my signature as a jab against me considering that you know nothing about me. Based on your attitude and your comments, you seem like a bitter, judgmental person... let me tell you, those are both pretty unattractive traits.
I have no enemies, but am intensely disliked by my friends.share
I've been like Ian pretty much my whole 24 years of life have only had one girlfriend in all that time...Most people tell that being a total jerk is the only way I could ever be with a girl
shareTo udonome86,
Well it all depends on what sort of girls you are looking for. From the other posts all I have heard is "girls". I can't get "girls". "Girls" don't like me.
But what sort of girls are they talking about. For example, I have known some very, VERY pretty girls who were nice, but they really were not interesting. They were ok, but nothing about them was cool. Now, if someone is just looking for a quick date or a one night stand, then it's cool. I personally don't prefer one night stands. I just feel that it offers very little.
Like you say you have only had one girlfriend in your life. Well why is that? If you could get a girlfriend then you probably have some sort of attractiveness. Maybe most girls are just "ok" for you.
Think of Lance in this movie. He doesn't have a girlfriend (until Mary). He just hooks up with a few. And while all that is well and good...so what?
I think finding someone who you really like and is really cool is the way to go.
But there is some truth in what some of the other posters are saying. Once you find that girl that you really like, THAT is the time when you have to be confident. When you have to take charge.
Don't stress out about only having one girlfriend. It does not make you any better or worse than anyone else. And I imagine the time you spent with her was probably a lot more fun than a one night stand.
Quality not quanity.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah?
There's a thesaurus in the library. Yeah is under "Y".