And just go live with her sick dad? that doesn't seem wise at all to me. I understand Dean was the reason she lost her job but still---choosing to be a single mom when you just got fired and have no job is kind of stupid.
shareThe way I look at it, Cindy will be OK. She has her professional training and years of experience as an RN. That's a job that's in demand everywhere. Once he calms down, Dr. Feinberg would probably feel sorry for her situation and provide her with a reasonable reference.
Or even better, after everyone cools off, she might get her job back. No official HR documents were signed, after all, and it wasn't Cindy who came in drunk and rampaged through the office like a bull in a china shop. She's a hard worker with that one bad day to live down. Dr. Feinberg will be leaving the practice very soon anyway, to move to his new location.
i was in assumption that her old place would probably hire her back anyway once cooler heads prevailed.
Trace your footsteps back home. ^_^
She's done with him. No love. She's unhappy and miserable. She stayed with him this long for financial security and look where that's gotten her. Life is short. I'm sure she'll find more work and keep it moving. Thousands of single moms do it everyday without any assistance from the government.
shareI don't think he can actually fire her just because her husband caused a scene, surely he'd be liable to that. And even if he did she'd have no trouble getting work at a different hospital.
Ashmi any question
But you have to ask yourself: what does she gain by staying with him? Nothing but his (meager) income and his moony-eyed love talk. Both of which don't amount to much when you have an actual child to take care of. She had two children, basically. That's pretty tough, esp when you fall in love with someone and you both have unrealistic expectations. And...they were pretty young. This kind of thing happens all the time.
As previous posters have said, she will be ok. She can get a job in any city. She has her daughter. And after he's gone, she will have some calm and quiet. It seemed to me that she was going nuts taking care of a grown man, physically and emotionally.
When exactly did she "take care" of him? Describe one scene.
My guess is you are simply projecting from a previously failed relationship of your own where you left a guy you considered was too "childish".
After he buried the dog, she takes him in her arms and comforts him.
When he and the kid wake her up to make them breakfast, she gets up and does it, even tho he angered her.
She obviously makes the lion's share of the money, but you probably don't count that because she's just a woman and a shrew and a nut job and a bitch, right?
I'm not projecting anything on to the characters or the story. This stuff HAPPENED IN THE MOVIE.
Tho you are correct, I empathized with her because I too was married to a man who refused to grow up. I, too, had to walk around on egg shells because of his volatile outbursts, when he would destroy things I loved in a fit of rage (though never his own). This guy could write, draw, sing, play multiple instruments and was a great, entertaining storyteller, but wouldn't attempt to use these gifts seriously or go to college because it was too much work. It was enough to install cable all day, even though he hated dealing with people, as long as he could come home, drink some beer and smoke some weed and read his classic literature paperbacks. It was my job to "keep those f-ing kids quiet" after running a company all day. So yeah, I can identify with her desperation and resentment. I do not think the guy's wonderful sunshiny personality (and yes, I'm being sarcastic here) is worth the babyish bullsh*t he puts her through while she works a stressful job and is too tired to feel much joy anymore.
You know how I could tell immediately? Because its obvious you are turning a blind eye to a painfully persistent unbearably bitchy attitude of the woman here. I think your past experience has left you really biased. You are truly grasping at straws here if all you can come up with in the whole movie is one halfass hug in time of severe need and grumpily making inedible breakfast worth 5 seconds of effort while he takes care of the kid. If that's called taking care of the family then you have some nerve criticizing Dean who was comparatively a saint.
There is also no evidence that she makes the lion's share of the income. She is just a nurse and he a painter. Not that different in terms of earning potential. Not to mention not once in the movie has it been implied that he isn't financially independent or not helping out enough.
"...you have some nerve criticizing Dean who was comparatively a saint."
A saint. Really. A SAINT.
Ok, dude. Go ahead and judge me. Obviously you came here looking to strangle someone who reminds you of the wife character. But I'm not her. And neither is anyone who says he/she understands what Cindy was going through. So stop whining and taking out your frustrations on this board. Just understand that this movie is a success because it is able to generate a whole LOT of emotions in a whole LOT of different kinds of people. And that is brilliant. But don't confuse those who understand one character's POV easier than another character's with the characters themselves. Unless it feels good to you to attack someone anonymously on a message board. Then--hey. Knock yourself out. <shrug>
Peoples' pasts always influence their present, even when watching a movie. It doesn't mean that that person is right or wrong about the situation(s) in the film. Who am I to tell you what you're seeing as truth is wrong? I'm nobody, and I do respect your right to feel however you feel, and will not insult you. I'm speaking of my version of the truth. It might not agree with yours, but neither of us is truly right just because we THINK we are. So a little tact and respect would be appropriate in your response to my take on the film.
I have not lambasted you, or any other poster, who could relate to Dean. Hell, I "get" Dean. Like I said before, I think I would have been charmed by him too. You can't really blame Cindy for liking him, can you? HE LIKED HER TOO! The scene where he sings and she dances, I thought, was a great illustration of attraction at work. But things change when infatuation wears off and you realize that maybe this person is not right for you. And neither is faultless, or completely at fault. Nothing is black and white, really.
Great post and a very well constructed response to yinky.
"Doublethink. To deliberately believe in lies, while knowing they're false." Henry Barthes
...before burying the dog though, he explicitly told that dumb blond of his "to not leave the door open". Numerous times. What she did was the opposite. 'Cause she was "too busy" or "too tired" to follow this simple, yet vital rule.
And YOU claim that it was enough, after she indirectly KILLED the dog, to "take him in her arms and...comfort him".
*She killed the dog. Gives hugs to make up for it* Yeah, sounds "enough". Jeez....
Had it been a sole instance, she could be excused. Everyone makes mistakes/everyone can be forgetful. But no, the thing is that "princess Cindy", simply didn't care ENOUGH to follow vital rules. Much as she did with that crappy seatbelt thing, which she obviously had also been told before : "wear the freakin' seatbelt. It's vital. You're not alone. You got a kid that doesn't need you dead. And a husband too". TYPICAL of people who dislike taking directives (needless to say "orders"). Even if they are of utmost importance. I have/had people in my life (companions, relatives, friends) that are exactly like that : they don't give a rat's ass about following simple crap that are ESSENTIAL to life, unless they FEEL like it. It's like talking to a god-damn wall. Their constant excuse? "I didn't do it on purpose!". Yeah, you didn't - yet you didn't care ENOUGH to act responsibly, EVEN after you've been told about for so many freakin' times.
Not caring enough is a CRIME. Period.
...now as for the breakfast, he didn't just wake her up because he merely was such an a$$ : she HAD to get up anyway to go to work. And she didn't even tell him "can you give me another 15' mins of sleep honey and take care of Frankie's breakfast, please?" to see how much of a prick he is or isn't after all. In other words, by waking her up he simply followed the everyday routine. And, no matter how good he probably is with her frequently, he can't always offer himself to take burden off of her. In such times, the other one HAS to ASK for help. Did she? Nope. And don't tell me that he strikes you as the type that he does not care when his spouse is struggling. Plus, they already weren't in good terms with each other. Which makes one not being too eager to run after the other in order to serve that very other. In that case, one may stay "neutral". The thing is, when asked, has Dean ever turned her down on something? There's no evidence of the kind. If we had evidence that whenever asked for help, would say "that's not a man's job" or something of the like, then I'd agree that this would make him an a$$hole.
...what "lions" are you talking about btw? She's a NURSE. Not a doctor. And I guess being a nurse at some private clinic does not pay enough for the recipient to be considered a "top cat"...Plus, he paints homes. Which, around the globe, is kinda profitable as a craft. We of course do not know how exactly much he makes (or for what he has to pay - say, a mortgage maybe?) - but no especial financial issues of the couple are addressed in the movie. The only hints that are there, are his not being able to pay for more than a night at the hotel and her trying to "push" him to take advantage of his talents as a person. In the first case it isn't adequately explained if this situation is temporary or not. In the second, his wife could simply be bitching, without there being actual need (women do this ANYWAY. Even Michelle to Barack I guess, for him not being President of the whole Earth or something).
Anyway. The only stuff of what you wrote I can identify with, would be
"she's just a woman and a shrew and a nut job and a bitch, right?"
I only wish you meant it. It of course would first be a cold day in hell before any woman would actually mean THAT. :)
Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the pastshare
Oh, I can call a bitch a bitch is I think she really is one. I just don’t think she is one. I think she is trying to be an adult and her Peter-Pan husband made it impossible because he would rather drink and go to sex hotels, rather that address his problems. “If we have a romantic weekend, everything will be ok.” Well, it doesn’t work that way.
Look. Dean is a loveable guy. He is someone I wish I knew in high school. But as an adult? Naw, I already have a couple of kids to worry about.
Everyone is entitled to view the world in one's own eyes. Granted.
Yet, I think it's too much to call Dean a non-adult considering behaviour.
The way you mean an adult character, he would anyway not spare a single thought considering dealing with Cindy's weak persona in the first place and send her off. Not to mention that a "matured one" (aka the "adult" that you mean), would calculate and take into account adversities when she's braking the news that she is pregnant with somebody else's seed and send her off even sooner than that.
Cindy is a weak bitch lesser than life and actually does not deserve "immature Dean" all together. If you ponder on it you'll realise that she's actually looking for excuses in order to break it with him - in the sense of "one more thing out of him and we're done". And THAT'S bitching.
Meanwhile he's the one that is trying to keep it alive - in the sense of "let's do whatever in order not to part". Get it? She's sooner or later bound to break it, whereas he's even referring to their wedding vows.
Don't get me wrong though - I'm not saying she should stay with someone that she doesn't care enough for any more. What I'm saying is that Dean's "issues" are NOT actual issues at all : for example he doesn't let his family starve, he's not molesting his wife, he's not being bad or indifferent to the kid they're raising together. She's tired from everyday chores and she easily cracks up due to that, yes, but do we see her asking for help? Does the ever-giving-to-everyone Dean seem to be the kind to deny helping around the house/taking even more "responsibility"? Do we see him being a dominating a$$hole like her father or the jughead that impregnated her? Not once. He's simply "desperately trying" to get her back to him/"make her what she should be, considering the relationship and responsibility in general". His efforts do of course crash and burn - but the alternative to that would be kicking her ass out. Can't blame him for trying - even though it's against his best interest.
The problem with her is that she's not adequately appreciative and enduring.
The problem with him is that he has too big of a heart for his own good.
THEIR problem is that "she wants something else".
Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the pastshare
Well, your reaction is obviously based on your own background influences your impression of Cindy. Just like mine personal experience is with a Dean, as I pointed out earlier in this thread. I did not see Cindy as a weak person; I saw her as a strong, exasperated woman desperately trying to live a happy, normal, vanilla middle class life. Dean? He just wants to play.
shareI know better than projecting my background against my judgment, Yinky.
Other than that, it isn't an issue of how you decide to see things, but of utilising evidence. Evidence being a romantic person that is not easy on giving up - while on the other hand the other is of the kind that focuses on personal benefts.
Acting on ones own interest colors you even wise - yet not necessarily strong by definition.
She's a weak bitch.
He's the foolish and heroic strongman that will "finish last".
Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the pastshare
I am completely neutral in this argument, but I just wanted to say that it's fairly safe to assume she is making the lion's share in the household. I can't see him making more than $15-20 an hour, tops, while it's not entirely inconceivable that, with her experience, she's making at least twice that, despite the fact she works in a clinic and not in an inpatient setting. In other words, she's making at least $60,000 a year (before tax), minimum.
Just to put things into perspective, and this is coming from someone who lives on the East Coast, nurses who work in hospitals can make over $100,000 a year. Sure, not a doctor's salary, but the point is more than him, so at least give her that.
That's all I wanted to say.
Well the logical question to you, as well as Cindy would be, why did you marry him? Dean was the same as he was when she married him. If she didn't want a man like that, she shouldn't have married him, just like you shouldn't have married the awful man you CHOSE to marry.
shareStaying in a dead, miserable relationship would be the bad idea.
shareHer boss hit on her and then fired her after Dean hit him. Cindy was trying to get Dean to leave, too.
All this is to say that she either has a job, a MASSIVE wrongful dismissal suit, or both.
Given her dad's clear anger management issues, I think the bigger problem is taking Frankie to live there. It's also bad for Cindy. Her closed, cowering body language in the past scenes any time she's around her father tell me that a lot of her cycles of misery are coming from this guy. Her bad choices are enforced by the strain on her psyche that her father puts her through, and even though she wasn't in a great mental space with Dean, it's not going to get better - or it'll get worse - around her dad.