Has this been Considered?

Yeah, I definitely think there was a moment where she was in the relationship seriously. I think (unlike Tom) she just wasn't the type of person who usually ascribed 'soul mate status' to people she was just getting to know, so it took her a lot longer to figure out her own feelings for him. I definitely think she went back to his apartment after the fight because she cared for him and was emotionally invested by then. Maybe not soul-mate invested, but she definitely cared. And I'm one of the viewers who doesn't think her break up with him was actually that cold, but that it would have been quite hard for a person like Summer to bring up her problems with the relationship in a direct way without Tom losing his *beep* (but had he been paying attention he would have seen ages ago that she was unhappy).

I like this more than most opinions I've heard. I still side with Tom (I am basically Tom) but I think Summer is a lot more complex than just a "b!tch" or a "tease". Over the course of 500 days, human beings can change a whole lot, and even through a single day feelings aren't 100% one way or the other. I think Summer's view of Tom evolved over time, even as Tom's view of Summer seemed to grow and grow in intensity. What started as a cute office fling became a full blown idolization of "you are The One for me" in Tom's mind, and I think that's ultimately what put Summer off. But she did care about Tom; she spent almost two years with him, and having to break up with him was very hard for her to accept. I think she did consider a serious relationship with Tom, probably numerous times. It just never felt right to her.

Oh, for sure. Your entire argument is validated by my favorite line in the movie: "What I was never sure of with you." She was never sure if she wanted a serious relationship with Tom, which means she asked herself the question in the first place. By the end of the movie, it's clear that her emotions were more complex than Tom or the audience may have realized. That's why that last bench scene is so awesome. ^_^

I think Tom formated Summer for love. He showed her that she can trust somebody and true love is a possibility.

I think that without him she could never trust anybody. After him, she found true love. He opened her world for the possibility. Like a construction worker that build expensive houses he cannot afford.

I watched this movie again and i needed to say something about it. I love this movie.

And i will watch again and again.

Sorry my bad english, by the way.

They sat together having a penis shouting match. I had to admit that on some level they were acting less like lovers as much as a couple of college chums.

Going to a bar is not the best place for a couple to hang out and appreciate each other. That seems like another clue the relationship is not so good.

Even though Tom felt like he was on top of the world with Summer, to me the scene with the marching band was a clue that was making too much out of the situation. Poor fellow. Of course we empathize and even love him a little, but splitting with Summer seemed inevitable.

I agree with you that Summer's perspective is not presented in the movie but this is it's beauty, it makes you feel the same pain as Tom does. And there are even deeper layers to this story.

The first time I watched it I could not stop crying because I have experienced exactly the same story as Tom's (although I am a woman) exactly when the movie was promoted, in 2009. There is that kind of love that is so powerful that transforms you, it completely vanishes your ego and this aspect is hard to be presented in the movie. But it is subtly presented with the ending scenes of other character's opinion of what love is because it makes obvious that there are many people that never get to experience this kind of love. His love IS true and it is hard to not be obsessed when you're dealing with such strong feelings. But he is not trying to control her, as he says, he just needs a little more consistency. I think Summer doesn't so much grow bored with Tom or suffocated by his possessiveness, she is more disappointed that he does not understand her conflict. She is just not ready to admit she belongs to him by making it clear to other guys, as she already told him in the beginning - she is not comfortable accepting the role of being someone's ANYTHING. She is afraid of any sort of label, be it gf or even casual sexual partner, maybe this fear of labeling extends to a profession or other roles as well - isn't this her opinion about adulthood that she shared when they first met?

Their whole interaction began with this game she plays, she is communicating him in a coded way a conflict that she has, using their interactions just as an illustration. But these coded messages are related only to her conflict in general, and not related to her feelings, as her feelings are shown in her actions. She says, she does not want to be anyone's gf but then she sends him notes and kisses him in the copy room. She does not want to get serious but she drags him to IKEA to play house. She does not want to get married but cries in the movie theater at a wedding scene and invites Tom to her engagement party. The tragedy is that he did not understand her to the bottom of her conflict. He had a small victory of winning access to understanding her when she shared her dreams and fears that she hadn't told anyone before. But in all other situations he failed to decode the hidden meaning of her messages and only listened to her literately - he thought that her problem is about bf-gf status, is about committing to a relationship and is about getting married, when it is not, it is some abstract fear in general of labeling that goes way beyond the ongoing people and situations, who knows why.

I don't know about other viewers but I got the feeling that her relationships with her fiance is not that romantic but more practical and predictive. I would assume he does not try to understand her deeply as Tom does and doesn't enter into that game of hers. He just doesn't assume that she might have a deeper layer as Tom did. This is why she is not afraid of her fiance to understand and reveal her deepest secrets and face her with her fears, as Tom did. I think she was too scared of Tom and the possibility of him facing her with her own fears so she imposed control over her feelings towards him to protect herself, in the same way she did when her parents got divorced and she cut her hair as immunization. She didn't really stop loving him and you can see that when she enjoys Tom's company in the train, wants to dance with him, it's like a date. He knew this and this is why at the bench he asked her why she wanted to dance with him when then there was already a new guy in her life. Her response was not convincing.

I really feel for Tom and love him for I understand the pain you have when you find someone who is so afraid of their own feelings and you fall under the illusion that love will make them feel better and cure them. In many books I have read that people are so used to conditional love that they don;t know what true love is, and when they meet someone that loves them unconditionally, they are afraid as we are all afraid of the unknown. Sometimes people in their defenses affirm the opposit of their true desire and this is what I think of Summer's words to Tom in IKEA. After having so much fun playing house with him she tells him that their interaction is only casual.

...you got several things wrong. I.e. , Tom never became "selfish" and "possessive". Or Summer never lied to him (even partially, as you put it), about anything. What you basically missed is that Summer liked Tom much and wanted to give this a try - but it wasn't some huge crash that she had on him. And it simply took some months time for it to wear off and her to renounce it. In other words, there wasn't enough chemistry on her part, even though she did like/care lots for Tom.
Simple as that (happens ALL THE TIME in everyday life too), and there's no need to make it complicated...

Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the past