Things we learned from LHL
1) It's perfectly normal to have a teenager (one of them deceased) and pull up to your vacation house with little toy animals and a little red wagon on the lawn.
2) You can time your swimming speed by only looking at the watch when at the end of the swim.
3. It's perfectly okay to work at a store during tourist season and close it in the middle of the day to go to a motel to get high.
4. It's perfectly normal for two young girls to follow a guy to his creepy motel room and not question why he's there.
4. If a party of weirdo freaks shows up at your home in the middle of nowhere, it's okay if your husband leaves you alone with them to turn on the generator and escort them to the guesthouse.
5. If you have to empty the blood out of someone's lungs in a hurry, use a tube from a bottle of Windex because they're abnormally long.
6. If you're a teenager who has witnessed murder and rape by your father, don't run for help. Just sit against a tree and look up at the sky.
7. Blood money is sometimes literally blood on money.
8. If you've borrowed someone's boat, hide the key in a wine glass.
9. If you've used someone's house and boat for free, leave a bottle of champagne worth more than $4.
10. If you've escaped from a gang of killers, stand on a hill and yell to somebody a hundred feet away driving a tractor.
11. Don't tell a gang of killers that they're "pathetic".
"So, what would you like to see on your honeymoon, Mrs. Cord?" "Lots of lovely ceilings."