The girl Hervé was obsessed about was not a Japanese. She was a Chinese. Most probably a reward or a loot from China. She was the Jap village leader's companion or prize, but not wife. Naturally, Hervé could not have made love with her. She only brought to him a prostitute to spend the night with, as a sign of the lasting friendship between Hervé and the leader.
As to the second part of your question, a woman's intuition can sense if there is another woman. After the final voyage, Hervé was god-awfully depressed and pulled himself into seclusion. So she tried to look into the matter. Baldabiou knew he looked for a Jap translator, so he could have shared that little piece of information with her, and apparently, there was only one translator nearby. If Madame Blanche's memory served her right, it was not difficult to find out about all this at all.
There is nothing difficult to understand in it. I don't get why you did not get it. It is not really desirable to explain every procedure step by step. It's a good thing that the director never explained every single detail, because it does not matter exactly how she found out. What matters is what she did when she found out.
EDIT: I think cmcurrie2 has been badly beaten and harassed by some Japanese or Japanese mafia or someone else related to Japan, or maybe he wanted to be Francois Girard's gay lover, but was turned down. He calls this wonderful movie porn because it had 3-4 minutes of nudity in the whole film. It really gets on my nerves when losers with pathetically miserable educational standards or hidden grudge come here, thinking they are quite somebody and can also comment on films because they are qualified enough to type some basic English!
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