Busiest morning EVER! (Spoilers - if you can really spoil this anymore.)
Just watched the movie.
To quote Chandler from Friends: "It was the worst thing ever. And not just on TV"!
It's 2 hours later and i'm still reading this board in total disbelief that a script like that could ever get greenlighted and made into a film.
Sounds like all the studio execs had a case of "legal insanity" when they allowed this to be made. ))
My favourite thing is:
Ok, so I'm a lesbian psycho killer-lawyer in love with the maniac whose release I'm facilitating.
Apparently I'm a super-woman Terminator, I can shoot a gun, drive a bike, kill anybody at any time, I have a perfect knowledge of the law and forensics, I can take many hostages at the same time, etc
So, let's look at how I spent last days of my life.
I did research on Professor to find out about his sister who died 100 years ago.
I seduced Shelly and got SOMEONE else (who?) to get the secure combination to the secure area with secure files in the secure room - and I asked them to look closely around this entire secure room just to see if by any luck Professor has kept the tape of his sister being murdered. (Apparently it's easy to presume, that there's OF COURSE such a tape!)
Then my unnamed friend hands me this tape to never appear again.
I go and seduce a hooker and ask her to sleep with the professor in order to obtain his semen, and the hooker is happy to do that, she is of course bisexual and she likes me and would do anything for me, even if the request is totally crazy (but then - there's no crazy requests for someone who's brushing their teeth standing on one leg infront of the mirror naked!).
Now, for the last 12 hours of my life I'm gonna have a very tight schedule.
I go have drinks with Professor and my friends, then I set out to kill my classmate, having a busy night, recording a very good video and torturing someone like I've done it my whole life.
Straight after doing that, I go to the apartment of a hooker friend who is handing me Professor's condom and kisses me gently.
I go back to the killed girl apartment and fill her vigina with professor's semen and her apartment with the clues about professor.
I run to college looking fresh-faced and rested and attend what should be one of the shortest lectures in my life, but i still manage to show off with my great knowledge of the law (no wonder, been there done that!)
(Let's not forget that I already preprogrammed computer generated phone calles to the professor with the possibility of the dialogue beetween the man and recorded voice.)
I have my mysterious friend (or computer) call in the bomb threat.
I run and smash professor's car, which only takes me seconds, I'm such a pro!
Then I wonder around in the parking garage, wait untill Professor appears, hit myself in the face and ask him to look for the guy while standing there and waiting for ages.
On being taken to the police i manage to give my statement in the matter of minutes, I calm down completely and run to the professor's appartment to bring him highly sensitive files that his secretary is so happy to give to absolutely anyone, including a student who has just been assaulted by potential murderer.
I then pull out of my pocket a whole leather outfit with the helmet and I'm happy to shoot Guy Laforge who was the perfect suspect before that.
I exit Professor's apartment and put a bomb under his car having already programmed it to work with his remote control. (I'm such a genious!)
During this morning I'm still taking care of my client case and facilitate the stay of the execution...
I probably created the fire in the house just for the fun of it, but I forget really, it was a busy morning.
Then I only have about 3 minutes to run to my hooker friend and kill her straight away, while filling her apartment with the clues about Professor.
Then I go home and put on a heavy makeup and curl my hair - coz, you know, you always wanna look nice for the big reveal!
i go back to campus and kidnap the dean who's wondering about in the empty campus after the bomb threat.
I beat her up, make her call Professor, and put her in a special pulley while not killing her for some reason.
Then I'm happy to welcome my next victim who is knowingly and willingly arriving at this particular building at the right time and allows me to gag her and strap her to a chair and she's not fighting me despite seeing another hostage there. She also calls Professor.
Then Professor arrives and I make him give me a very strange forced confession, while juggling two women and confessing my love for the killer and my plan to set Professor up.
And let's not forget! All of this - before Noon!
Yes, I'm a super woman with special powers over Time!
Then i get a bout of bad luck with one of the dumbest FBI agents in town and get shot.
Damn, it seemed like such a promising morning right up untill that!!!