That's a good observation, but I believe that East Germany "loosened up" (for lack of a better term) because of the natural progression, or rather the natural political decay, of totalitarian systems. We will never know if Nazi Germany would have decayed into a post-totalitarian system, because the Third Reich, the only example of right-wing totalitarianism, was utterly destroyed and its host country rebuilt along a capitalist democratic model (half of it, anyway). We only saw what happened to left-wing totalitarian regimes such as the USSR and its satellites. The GDR wasn't trying to impress the West, given the confrontational Soviet rhetoric its government parroted, and it's not like the U.S. and its allies would invade in order to bring down the repressive regime (in fact, East Germany itself had plans for the invasion of West Berlin). Rather, totalitarianism across the Eastern Bloc decayed into post-totalitarianism because of internal politics and relations among the Warsaw Pact countries.
The Stasi, while covert, was yet another secret police force of Eastern European communist states, following the model of the Soviet secret police (I'm not naming it only because it went through so many name changes). The GDR was not the only country with an extensive system of informers to supplement the actual secret police, Romania's Securitate also had a large amount of informers. Finally, the existence of a wide, intrusive secret police force is in itself a totalitarian characteristic, the GDR had one because it was a state founded on the totalitarian model.
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