"If you actually read my message then you'd notice that I did say a year apart in high school is pretty noticeable. I mean personality wise and maturity level. Freshmen and Juniors are a lot different.If you don't see what could possibly be wrong with a 14 year old with a 16 year old, you yourself are probably only 14."
Seventeen, actually, and I know people at school that date people one or two years younger. Is there anything wrong with a junior dating a college freshman? That's two years, and they're in different schools, not just grades. But plenty of people do that, too. Hardly anyone dates people in their own grade--probably because they've known them forever and remember their annoying or awkward elementary school years.
"In case you didn't know, adolescents go through a lot of growing during their years in high school. Once you become a junior you will definitely notice the differences between yourself and a freshmen. At least in my experience there have been several. Maybe you go to a magical movie-like high school where all grades are indiscriminant. Also her age is the maximum expected for a girl "graduating" junior high. She could be 13 for all we know, does that make it any worse? A three year age difference?"
I've already finished my junior year, and while I personally wouldn't date a freshman, I know plenty of people who did. Usually they're the somewhat more mature freshman, but they are still freshman.
For all we know, maybe she's fifteen. Maybe her birthday is in September, so she's a bit older. Does that make it any better? A one year age difference?
As with puberty, it doesn't happen all at once. So yeah umm...she's still developing and in the early stages of puberty. She won't stop growing till she's 18. So she still has about four or five years to go. Granted she looks somewhat developed, but in real life she was 16 when she did the movie. Also your average is WRONG. Last I read the average age for the onset of puberty in a girl was about 12."
Well, I'm not going from reading, I'm going from experience. By fifth grade (10 or 11 years old) over half of the girls in my grade had started puberty, and by sixth nearly everone had. Some girls began in third or fourth grade. That would make the average age, here at least, about ten. (Fifth grade, of course, being the year when guys realize the can snap girls' bras.)
And of course it doesn't happen all at once, but most girls are pretty close to done growing by the age of sixteen. It is possible to continue growing until the age of twenty-one or so, but I know most girls won't grow too much more after they're sophomore or junior years of high school.
But you're right, everyone is different.
However, as for the title of the thread, ignoring the technicalities in age, you have to have sex with them to be a pedophile. I don't know about your state, but in mine the statutory rape law is under 16, 4 year age difference. So 14 and 18 would be illegal, but 14 and 17 would not. Since we assume she's 13 or 14 and he's 16 or 17, it would completely legal.
Morally or socially acceptable is completely different matter.
When you consider the age and popularity together, though, it does seem a little less realistic. He is, after all, popular; she might become popular, but up until that point was pretty unpopular. If you add the age difference, it does seem a little odd that a popular junior would date an unpopular freshman.
Odd, yes, but not perverse.
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magoox26
17 years ago
“Is there anything wrong with a junior dating a college freshman? That's two years, and they're in different schools, not just grades. But plenty of people do that, too. Hardly anyone dates people in their own grade--probably because they've known them forever and remember their annoying or awkward elementary school years.”
Just because people do, does not mean they should. Like I have stated before a year can be a very noticeable difference, particularly if one of them if embarking on such a momentous change in their life. College is really different than high school. Just as high school really different than middle school. As for the “Hardly anyone dates people in their own grade…” I think you are making a too general statement with no substance to back it up besides your own high school experience, which may or may not be a typical American experience. You might have gone to a private school or a really small school in the middle of nowhere. Either way it is not pertinent to the discussion.
“For all we know, maybe she's fifteen. Maybe her birthday is in September, so she's a bit older. Does that make it any better? A one year age difference?”
Yes I do believe it is better. Fifteen and 16 is a better age match than 13 and 16. I have stated why in earlier posts. In the movie one girl was at least 15 and driving. None of the main girls were able to drive a real car so I assume that they were all the “typical” age for their grade, so 13 or 14 it is.
“Well, I'm not going from reading, I'm going from experience. By fifth grade (10 or 11 years old) over half of the girls in my grade had started puberty, and by sixth nearly everone had. Some girls began in third or fourth grade. That would make the average age, here at least, about ten.”
Once again you are going by your own experience which makes your “data” bias and there is no way you could really know when anyone started puberty unless they relinquished the exact date they started menses and even then it is not the precise date they may have started puberty. The “official” start of puberty is when a girl becomes able to reproduce aka bear children, as in the day she produces an egg. Since there are no reliable outward signs of ovulation, most people regard menstruation as the starting point. Also puberty does not equal maturity. Just because one is physically “mature” does not mean they are ready to have a relationship with someone older.
”However, as for the title of the thread, ignoring the technicalities in age, you have to have sex with them to be a pedophile. I don't know about your state, but in mine the statutory rape law is under 16, 4 year age difference. So 14 and 18 would be illegal, but 14 and 17 would not. Since we assume she's 13 or 14 and he's 16 or 17, it would completely legal.”
An adult does not have to have sex with a pre-pubescent child in order to be considered a pedophile. Look up definitions before you make such bold statements. They just have to have a sexual inclination, partly or exclusively, towards pre-pubescent children. Statutory rape laws are for splitting hairs. They are to determine whether an adult has had consensual sex with a minor that is or is not “competent enough to consent to sex.” Statutory rape laws are different from state to state. The minimum for most is 16. So legally she cannot give consent for sex and if Sean Faris’s character was 17 then I would still be careful because he could be tried as an adult if her parents choose to press charges. Despite all that, just because one can does not mean one should.
The popularity issue is a good point. One could argue that popularity is an unfair advantage which could sway Alexa Vega’s character into doing something she is not ready for, but say Sean Faris’s character is.
“Odd, yes, but not perverse”
Odd and perverse could be said to be synonyms. Odd is something that is not ordinary, while perverse is something that goes against what is normal. Perverse does not always have to mean something sexual. It could just be something deviant to what is considered normal. Odd and perverse could both be defined as something abnormal.
"It's not stupid, it's advanced!" ~Purple Tallest
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makm76
17 years ago
"Just because people do, does not mean they should."
Very true.
"The “official” start of puberty is when a girl becomes able to reproduce aka bear children, as in the day she produces an egg."
Official, but it's generally marked as the point where sex hormones are first released and development first occurs, which is actually about two years earlier.
But you're right, physically and emotionally mature are two completely different things.
"Odd and perverse could be said to be synonyms."
Fine, how about odd but not sick? Is that better?
I'm not trying to validate or rationalize the relationship, just pointing out that calling it pedophilic is exaggerating to say the least.
However, considering how easily she was convinced to do the scavenger hunt, I think it's safe to say that he could easily get her to go farther than she wants to, since she really doesn't seem to be a very strong-willed person. Whether he does or not, we don't know, because the movie ends before they really have a true 'relationship.'
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